How can this be?

[stepmomtwo1]

I have a friend who's daughter is in a custody battle with her ex husband. This man is a real loser. He has four kids with four different mothers and pays no child support for ANY of them because he claims he does not work. (He was only ever married to this woman and that only lasted 3 months because he was seeing ANOTHER woman).

So at the last court date the court advocate said she thinks they want to give custody of the child to the father. I don't think it's a bad idea as the mom is odd but I think both parents are not good parents. I just wonder why they would take a man who is thousands of dollars behind in child support to 4 different children and not put his darned butt in jail.

If my dh were late (which he never ever has been) they would be on his butt like flies on poop! And that I know. So why can some men just walk away and pay nothing while others like us are paying more then we can ever afford and nobody seems to care? I guess the mother of the oldest child doesn't want child support because if he pays then she will have to give him visitation and she doesn't want him to have anything to do with the child.

The courts know where to find this guy,he is in the court house a lot fighting to get this child. Why is he allowed to just walk away from what his children are due?

Heck my dh's ex has not lifted a bleach blond,fake tanned finger in 14 years but she "showed a need" for more money last year and took us back to court....yeah like our kids are getting reduced lunches and wearing school clothes from the re-sale shop because we're rolling in the dough.

Sorry but this really REALLY makes me MAD. Our court systems really S*C*!

[KAT]

Because support & visitation including custody are seperate matters. Our judge gave biohag custody even though she never paid a dime for SEVEN YEARS (was only ordered 20. per week), bought a loaf of bread a gallon of milk or even saw her own children on a regular basis (gone for 2 years straight with no contact) simply because the judge felt 1. the teens wanted to live with their mother now 2. the mother needed to bond with her children.  She wasn't ordered to pay back support because she was a *hardship* case. Ever see a man get away with that?  The bias judge actually told Mr. KAT "She can't pay you back support, she needs YOUR money now to pay HER bills. She is indigent, can't YOU see that? What is the matter with YOU SIR, she has nothing!". Then asked me how much I made so she could increase the $2,000 PLUS per month award. Luckily, I wasn't sworn in. They live in a 350 per month trailer. Both kids have ONLY 8th grade educations, have done jail time...Support is the same now even though it's only for one teen (luckily only for the next year) AND NOT ONE OF THEM WORKS!!! This isn't CHILD SUPPORT, this is family support & hidden alimony! Supporting them all the way to jail because stealing & scaming is going to be the only way they can support themselves once the income stops. Biohag is an expert on living on OPM (other peoples money). Since SD is 18 she is now preggers, on welfare & has a slip/ fall going to court. Nice eh?
Sucks eh? Trust me, I have stronger words.
Sorry for venting.
KAT

[cinb85]

The deadbeats (like my ex) get away without paying their child support because the courts get tired of dealing with them (locating them is often difficult and then they claim that they are not working).  It's deadbeats like my ex that make it difficult for good men who are decent fathers to survive.

The courts only harrass the fathers who ARE working and who are EASY to find.  It's not fair.  My ex has 7 children by 5 different women.  He doesn't pay support for ANY of them, yet he's been pretty much getting away with it for over 13 years now!  The courts just don't want to be bothered with him.   It's said to know that there are 7 children out there that the courts just don't seem to care about!

[cinb85]

Yes, I HAVE seen a man get away with that.  Over and over again!!!!!
Yet he keeps fathering more children!

In my opinion, the courts only go after the people (both CPs and NCPs) who are decent, hardworking people who just want to do the best they can for their children.  Those who don't even try to be good parents, those who don't even try to get a decent job to support their children, get away without supporting their children!  The system stinks!