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Child Support Rant

Started by jilly, Aug 18, 2005, 09:03:37 AM

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DH got a form letter in the mail yesterday about his child support.
stating that he is behind in his support payments, last payment they received was on 08/09/05, he is supposed to pay $560.00/month for child support, $25.00/month towards arrears and that his past due support is $626.08.  Well duh!!  He's been in arrears since CS was modified in August 2003.  Modification was filed in May 2003.  As we all know that creates an automatic arrearage.

What's really stupid about the whole thing is: 1) CS and amount for arrears is withheld from his WEEKLY paycheck.  The amounts that are whithheld are EXACTLY what the withholding ORDER states they should be for a weekly pay period and 2) when he was approximately $2K in arrears (due to the retroactive nature of modification) they NEVER bothered him.  Now that he's got it down to where there's light at the end of the tunnel they want to start bitching and demand he pay it in full immediately.  HA!   Needless to say, when DH read this letter he was furious.

And ya know what is even more stupid?  Even if he COULD pay the $626.08 the BM wouldn't get the full amount because he has a PRIOR child support order so ALL child support that comes in is DIVIDED between the two!!  What a bunch of dumbasses.

I suspect that what has happened is: DH now gets bonuses.  The first bonus check he received he didn't actually get because it went to child support.  Seeing the handwriting on the wall they're probably gearing up to take him back for an increase.  Also, the BM is in a custody/CS battle with her ex over their two children.  Things may not be going or may not have gone good there so she's trying to recoup her losses.

I swear...some days I think we just need to find a deserted island where we can't be found to get away from all this bullshit.


been in your shoes, got a Tshirt for our efforts.

sounds like your state got a new system or an enhancement to their system.  the arrearage letter or status of arrearage was pretty typical for us when we were behind.  

it just happens to have been issued the same time as he got his bonus.  relax, you're almost done, the light is at the end of the tunnel.  


Island sounds real nice right about now!!! ;)  
Here I am back at the beginning...BF has yet again disappeared into thin air.  (Funny when I wanted to move, I got a resounding "NO" and a restraining order!)  I do know what city he has moved to, however no clue where and only know because another of his baby's mama's told me!  Do you really think he is going to tell me where he is working?  HAHAHA.  My CSO has a great attitude too "he has to live and survive too you know"  Well you know as long as he is living and surviving to hell with his DD and her survival.  What happens to the kids that have a CP that can't or won't step up when NCP won't?  Oh well, So now my back support is drastically picking up speed number wise!  Like I will ever see it!  Thanks for letting me vent!  


wow that sounds so familiar!  DH was in arrears one months worth of 557.40 and during the month that I was trying to catch up we were served a contempt of court by the child support enforcement agency stating we have to pay it by august 30 AND go to court, oh yeah don't forget to bring a pay stub so we can see if we can screw you even more!  I swear I understand child support but I'd be more willing to pay that much towards bills or clothes day care costs etc than just handing over a friggin check so she can do with as she sees fit!


WOW!  What state are you in?
BD is months and months behind and all they have done to him is take his license away (like it matters, he still drives). I am on both sides of child support.  DH has to pay CS.  SD (7) has started coming over asking him if he had a job and saying "you are poor" "you are broke" "you don't have any money"  this is all so funny to me becasue we started paying CS at the end of the month instead of the beginning.  The 1st month we did this, 3 days before the end of the mo. BM called her attorney to tell her that DH was 1 month behind. (Nope! Guess again!) It is also funny that she tells SD DH is broke considering he just took SD on a trip to GA. (from WA!) for a week!  This is also coming from a woman (if you can call  her that ;)) that has held 1 job for LESS than 9 months in AT LEAST the LAST 4 YEARS!!!  I would REALLY be far more willing to buy clothes, bills, etc.  ESPECIALLY considering every time BM gets CS she (BM) is sporting new clothes and SD will have one or two new things like a new dress or shorts and her shoes are still too small!  and then say "my mom spent (amt. of child support) on me" I am looking at her like ya right, so then where did BM get all her new stuff (she has NO OTHER visible source of income~not even state assist.) That BURNS me up SO BAD!  We have decided to pay her weekly instead of one monthly lump sum to see if that will help curb some of that, doubt it, but it is worth a try!


We live in NC but I really think that in my state's case it's really what county you live in.  Example.  mY best friend has an ex husband who doesn't pay his cs payments on time.  She actually has to take his butt to court and the judge has to lock him up b4 he'll hand over any amount of money.    


We live in NC too.

I called the enforcement officer that signed the letter yesterday because they wanted a response from DH before 08/26. He was out of town and wasn't going to be back until 8:00 last night.  I just called to let her know he'd gotten the letter and that he was out of town and hadn't had a chance to call her before he left.

I explained to her how it was coming out weekly as ordered, that he didn't have the money to pay it off and that even if he did BM wouldn't get the full amount because it would be divided due to prior CS order.  She was actually pretty nice about the whole thing.  Of course, she was trying to "encourage" me to have DH pay it off since he's so close to being caught up.

If I understood her correctly the reason why they sent out this letter is because they're reviewing everybody's file who is in arrears $500 +.  They will then be notifying the IRS of those who are in arrears and then sending out letters informing NCP's that their federal tax refund will go towards unpaid child support.  Oh well, IF we even have a federal tax refund then they can have it just so DH can get caught up on this crap. The State has taken part of our refund for the past 2 years.  Haven't had a federal tax refund in the past 2 years because DH did side work and reported taxes on that money at the end of the year.  He hasn't done that this year so will be interesting to see if we get a refund or not.  You can believe I'll be filing an innocent spouse form!

I was surprised she actually talked to me. Most of the times they're all snippy and saying they can't discuss it with me because I'm not a party.  Although I understand their reasoning it still irritates me because it DOES affect the income of my household.

DH called me before he left for the airport and I told him about the conversation.  He tried calling her as well but she was gone to lunch.  He's going to try calling her again on Monday.


That is just so crazy to me!  It must just be WA then.  BF has been in arrears since he STARTED paying CS.  I didn't request back support and CS only ordered him $25 a month.  He was in arrears from day 1.  Than I took him for a review and CS was raised and at that time I requested it be taken from his check.  They agreed.  So he did manage to pay, but he worked for a school district so when he didn't work in the summer I didn't get CS.  (He worked temp jobs during the summer, but they wouldn't touch it because it was "just temp")  So now he is over $1200.00 in arrears! and he moved and CS has no clue where he is.  I did call and I at least know what city so now it is just a waiting game.  I am sure it will be several more before they catch up to him;  
And they are harrassing you for $500.00?  That is rediculous!  I am so sorry....


Yeah....I believe that's part of the statute on CS.  If you're in arrears of $500 or more they go after you.  May just be state specific and where you live it may be different.


Yep 500 $ is all it took for them to come after us.  It makes sense about the income taxes being withheld but I swear it's like they don't even give you time to catch up without taking you to court.  GRRR.  I swear I am really looking forward to being done with this crap.  My youngest step kid is 4 1/2 so we've got 13 1/2 yrs left.  Yeah I am counting down.


Again, I am sorry!  They really make it difficult for those that try to do right!  And those that don't, well they get every chance and then some!  DH was behind because he didn't even know their was a SD (and BM had no clue who the BF was it was a 1 in 7 shot)  so went DNA came back he had to repay the state and pay for testing.  They took current support and some arrears from each check and then took his income tax for I think 2 years.  Some how that isn't quite fair either.  BM had no responsibility for sleeping around.  Oh well it is said and done and he hasn't been behind since then.  I know that if we miss a month we will have to file a harrassment suit!  ;)


I am really ashamed to call myself a woman sometimes.  The actions of some of these women make me feel physically ill.  I bet your DH was shocked that he was the 1 in 7 that came out positive.  I don't think it's right that they could make him pay arrears for a child that he didn't even know he had.  A more appropriate approach would be to just start from that date, because this was the date he actually became a father!


I agree!  I detest that I am "a baby mama" I pose no drama, yet most females that I hear about are just like that.  
I too feel like he just got blind-sided and now he has to fight at every bend in the road just to see SD and have a relationship with her.  BM is constantly showing her sociopathic behind and making visits miserable for all involved!  
I have BEGGED my DD BF to be a part of DD life, but he refuses and yet men that do want to step up and be men are denied...it is a true tradgedy!


DH and I went to court yesterday about our 1 month late support, which was paid by the end of the July in full.  We just had our receipt showing that the arrears are caught up and showed the cancelled check.  So we were told DH wasn't in Contempt and that we could leave.  Why wouldn't they have told us this before the court date? I dont know, however DH did have a question to ask the judge.  He wanted to continue paying weekly instead of having his pay check garnished.  That was when we found out that it was a state statute that it be garnished.  Oh by the way we were the last ones heard and the person calling the cases KNEW what we wanted to ask the judge.


 am writing to you today so that I can share something with you that I found or stumbled on more or less. I hope this information can help to set men free of the tyranny of Family Court. Anyway here is what I found. I was reading USC at Title 18 sec. 1581 Peonage when it occurred to me that enforcing an order to pay support cannot be enforced without voluntary compliance. Black's Law defines Peonage as a condition of servitude (prohibited by the 13th amendment and Title 18 sec. 1581 of the USC) compelling persons to perform labor in order to pay of a debt.   TITLE 18 > PART I > CHAPTER 77 > § 1581  

§ 1581. Peonage; obstructing enforcement

(a) Whoever holds or returns any person to a condition of peonage, or arrests any person with the intent of placing him in or returning him to a condition of peonage, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than 20 years, or both. If death results from the violation of this section, or if the violation includes kidnapping or an attempt to kidnap, aggravated sexual abuse or the attempt to commit aggravated sexual abuse, or an attempt to kill, the defendant shall be fined under this title or imprisoned for any term of years or life, or both.
(b) Whoever obstructs, or attempts to obstruct, or in any way interferes with or prevents the enforcement of this section, shall be liable to the penalties prescribed in subsection (a
  TITLE 42 > CHAPTER 21 > SUBCHAPTER I > § 1994
§ 1994. Peonage abolished

 The holding of any person to service or labor under the system known as peonage is abolished and forever prohibited in any Territory or State of the United States; and all acts, laws, resolutions, orders, regulations, or usages of any Territory or State, which have heretofore established, maintained, or enforced, or by virtue of which any attempt shall hereafter be made to establish, maintain, or enforce, directly or indirectly, the voluntary or involuntary service or labor of any persons as peons, in liquidation of any debt or obligation, or otherwise, are declared null and void.

Also Minnesota Supreme Court Case Clausen v. Clausen  which reversed the order of a district court for violation of the elements necessary to find a party in civil contempt.
250 Minn. 293; 84 N.W.2d 675; 1957 Minn. LEXIS 631