court yesterday....long

[hatewelfare]

Well, now that that's behind me I have another hurdle to jump. The court was schedauled for 11 to 3, we ran from 11 to almost 5PM! I represented myself at the hearing.

2 days before, her attoreny served me with a anmended order, they wanted me to attenden parenting classes, make a seperate bedroom and bed for my son, she wanted 3 weeks of my summer visitation and everyother weekend during my summer visitation. Plus they wanted me to not be able to have my son spend the night at any non-relative person.

The judge asked at the hearing if we still wanted to go ahead with the evediatry hearing as the opposing party amended their order and didn't want a hearing now. I said I did want the hearing, her attorney objected to it. But the judge ruled that I had made my motion in a timely matter and made enough evidence in it to hold a hearing based on interfeance and such. So we went ahead with it.

I, the judge and even the GAL caught her in many many lies. When she couldn't lie she would answer a YES or NO question with "I can't remember" or "I'd have to look at my calander" or some other dumb lame excuss.

A few I caught her in was when she moved into her boyfriends homes in St. Cloud...I asked how many bedrooms they had, "2"
I asked there were 2 other guys living there right? "no" (lie)
I asked if my son slept on the couch ever?  "for a few weeks"
Where did you and your boyfriend sleep?  "in a bedroom"
Why did my son sleep on the couch then? "because jerry rented a room from her boyfriend"
I then asked "I just asked you before if anybody else was living with you other than your boyfriend"
At this piont the judge looked back at her and then PBFH said " you asked if 2 guys lived with us, it was just one"
How long did he rent from you? "a couple of months"
And my son sleep on the couch for that time "yes"
Did you watch TV in that room, living room with him on the couch at night. "we had 2 other TV's in the house"
I said did you watch TV in that room at night, YES or NO! "ummmmmm yes"

Another one was later in the day when the GAL got to ask questions. GAL said that my son was tardy alot for school and that was a concern back then and asked how many times he was late. PBFH "6"
I then slid a report I had printed out over to the GAL that showed 12 tardies
GAL then said she was just shown a report that shows double that amount PBFH "I can't recall"
I got that enterned into evidence after a round around with her attorney and the judge.
Another one was when I asked her if she was evered interviewed or taped when she was sexaully abused as a child. Her attoreny objected to the quewstion and the judge overruled and allowed the question.
PBHF " I can't recall it was back in '82...I don't even know if they had video camras then"
ME: But you where interviewed and asked questions about the assult?
PBFH: I can't remeber...I've tried to block it from my memory
ME: So it was that tramatic that you tried to block it from your memory and yet you put my son though it instead of calling me to ask about what had happened?
PBFH: I was just trying to protect him, that was my first priorty all  I was thinking about.
at that point the judge stepped in and aske PBFH what my son told her.
PBFH: that his Dad touched him on his bottom.
Judge: so that is consitant with the Police reports, the taped interview and the CPS conclussion that he had just touched him.
PBFH: I never watched the taped interview
Judge: well, you where given the oppertunity to...if you haven't that is your own falt then. Did he ever say anything else had happened other that his Dad touched him?
PBFH: No

Another one that PBFH pulled was when we wher discussing a police call PBFH made on me about the end of the summer visitation. It was about a question of "end of the week" Sat. Or Sunday. The order was writen that I have to have him back by the end of the first week in Augest.
She called the cops on me when she was waiting in Windom on Sat. I told her I would be there Sunday not Sat.
In the court room now...
Me: you called the police on me this summer correct?
PBFH: yes
Me:I told you I would be there Sunday correct?
PBFH: yes
Me: you faxed up a copy of the order to the police department and they came to the same conclussion as Sunday correct?
PBFH: well, yes
Me: you wanted me arrested right?
PBFH: I thought you where in contemt of court.
Judge: Did he tell you he would be bringing him back on Sunday?
PBFH: yes
Judge: you called the police from Windom?
PBFH: no
Judge:???????
PBFH: I didn't have the court order with me in Windom and had to drive back home then.
Judge: But he said he would be there in Windom on Sunday?
PBFH: Well, I was confuzed...the order was written poorly and is very confuzing.
Judge: looking down and away rolling eyes....anything else?
 LOL The judge wrote that order herself!!

This type of stuff went on all day long...

not that I did a great job, but I think I prooved my point. At the end The judge told the PBFH that she had allowed the move to Iowa based on party that she was moving to get away from her abusive boyfriend and now she has maintaned contact and even called him many times...
Judge asked the GAL to get on the stand and give a recommendation...
She said she had some concerns before and said she was VERY concerned now and recommended a phyc test on us both.

So now it is ordered that both she and I take a MMPI test.

I just got off the phone with the GAL and she said that the custody will be based on the results of this test.

I have gathered that the judge and the GAL think there may be some emotional problems with the PBFH. The GAl said she was at my home and my Girlfrieds home and said she isn't concerned with the physical envioment at this time...but is more concerned about the emtional envioment of the child. I can't see how they would be concerned about me...I think the PBFH is the one that is in question. But they want a "pyc. picture" of both to make a fair ruling.

This may be the oppertunity for me I've been waiting for. At least I think I'm normal and stable...I'll leave that up to the test to show.

Pray for me and my son....

[lucky]

You and your son will definitely be in my prayers!!  It does sound as if it went well for you though.  She obviously knows she's screwed up or she wouldn't be lying on the stand about stuff.

Is there a deadline for you both to take the MMPI?  I hope so or she could drag this out forever!

Keep up the good work, your son deserves it.

[hatewelfare]

When I talked to the GAL she said that she'll be sending a report of where to go next this coming week. She wants to get it done ASAP. The judge has a muder trial next month and the next court date won't be until May sometime.
The GAL wants it done by then for sure.

The cost is what I'm worried about...not for me, I can take some out of my 401k, but she'll raise a stink about it I'm sure and try not to pay or say she can't pay.

I asked the GAL about this and she said that she doesn't have a choice in the matter now...it's been ordered be the judge, if she doesn't she'll be in contempt.

Finally after 9 years I have a judge that may actually see through her lies and the effects it causes our child.

[hisliltulip]

Good luck, I know this has been a very trying time for you.

How is your son holding up through this mess?

BETH