mom telling kids about upcoming court case

[ape032]

Quick history:
Jan 2004 kids( currently girl 10, boy 8) came to live with DH and myself, stepmom. We won custody during the school year and BM gets custody for 2 months during the summer. BM lost custody due to her anger management issues and mainly PAS.  There was no child support awarded, me and dad pay for everything during the school year and most activities during the summer. BM refuses to help contribute financially.  Because BM's behavior has not changed since the custody change and at the recommendation of our co-parenting counselor- we have filed a motion for change of custody- asking for full custody.  At this point we've been through depositions and that's about it. BM has asked for a GAL and we have already spent $15k on a pysch evaluation back in 2003 in which the pysch recommend DH to get full legal and physical custody.
Problem:
Tonight we have learned that the BM has sat down with the kids and explained to them that we are taking her back to court. She told them she is having to show the court she wants them to live with her and that she wants to be with them. She wants them to know that their mommy loves them. She also told them that we were taking her back to court because of their homework. One of our many issues is that she is not capable of helping them do simple elementary homework- it's usually incomplete or just flat out wrong.

We found out because she was discussing this at ball practice with another parent and they felt that we should know what was going on.
The kids have been acting aggressive and very aggrivated towards DH and me since they've been back. They are very argumentative and emotionally very fragile.
Any suggestions on how to handle this? What to say to them? We have never discussed court, attorneys or any other adult issues with them and certainly don't want to start now.  But, now we know they are in serious emotional distress and other than loving them and being there- how can we assure them we only want to help them?

[wendl]

She should not be discussing the case with the kids, if this other parent has heard her discussing the court issues with the children, see if this parent will write an afidavit (sp) in regards to this.

[gidgetgirl]

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[wendl]

Gidget I will send you a pm.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**