It's over!!!

[crayiii]

I posted the following on Soc's board but thought I would put it here as well and thank everyone for the support!!!  

I learned a bunch over the last year and a half but here are some of the big ones.

Be aggressive at protecting your rights as a parent.
Be aggressive at protecting your child's rights to have both parents.
Your attorney doesn't care about your case (that sounds harsh but keep in mind, they are there to make a living and have multiple cases.  You need to manage your case)
Don't settle for less than you feel is in your childs best interest.
Your soon to be ex is not your friend (in a custody dispute)
Keep records - EVERYTHING.  Phone calls, face-to-face meetings, etc.
BE a good parent.
Don't give up.
Don't give an inch when in comes to the other parent not following orders
Follow the orders.
You must prove that you are a good parent.
You more than likely won't be able to prove the other parent is a bad parent, don't focus on that unless you can PROVE it.
Don't agree with "bad" stuff in a temp plan, it will more than likely stay.
If you think the other parent will screw up go for a temp plan and stall the final orders so you have proof of the screw ups.
Keep your emotions in check.

There are a bunch more but I'm going to go eat now...


I had the conference with the judge today and he started it by saying he wanted to get a settlement by the end of the meeting. He had our settlement agreement and asked my wife and her attorney if they agreed with it and they said yes. He then asked me (I did agree with it but figured it never hurt to ask for more) I said that I pretty much agreed but had some issues with it.

The judge asked what my issues were and I told him that I wanted more time with my son. He wanted to know what I wanted so I shot the moon. I said that I wanted every long weekend in the year, I wanted Christmas break, Thanksgiving break, Spring break, half of summer break, my sons birthday, my birthday, fathers day, and on top of all of that, one additional weekend per month.

The judge then went through the calendar and picked out the additional weekend each month and said "that sounds reasonable" IT WAS AT LEAST 2 AND MOSTLY 3 PERIODS EACH MONTH!!!

He then asked my wife if she agreed and she said that she didn't because she worked 6 days a week and could afford the ticket costs and the time away from work to drop off/pick up. The judge told her that that's the cost of being a parent and moving away.

He then asked about anything else and I told him that I wanted to include my bankruptcy and that she agrees to my petition and I did not want a hold harmless clause. He said fine, her attorney said fine.

I said that I wouldn't agree to any spousal support and that I wanted a 200 per month credit on my child support. Again, the judge said "that is reasonable"

At the end the judge said that we are now going on record. He read everything and told my wife that by agreeing she was giving up her right to go to trial and to ever get spousal support. She said yes that she agreed after heated discussion with her attorney.

The judge then said that the agreement was on record and the her attorney was to fax it to me and I was to sign it and fedex it back.

Her attorney called tonight to let me know that he was faxing it and that he wanted to make sure I would mail it. I told him that I would because I was happy with the outcome. He said "well, you should be."

Looks like I'm done!!!!!

Oh, and the judge made me drop the contempt charge.

[MYSONSDAD]

Your child won!

From how I read this, you got everything you asked for. Congrats!

[crayiii]

Yeah, and somethings that I didn't ask for like the tax exemption.

[Kent]

Congratulations, Crayii.

I know you had many disappointments, doubts, and discouragement, but you did the right thing.
It was all worth it in the end!

Kent!

[MYSONSDAD]

Check with your tax preparer. If there is nothing in the agreement, you might be able to deduct him if you get there first. But check this out, laws seem to change with the wind.

"Children learn what they live"

[wendl]

Caryii,

That is wonderful.  I know how frustrating things have been for you.

:)

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[crayiii]

No, the judge DID give me the exemption!!!  It's written in the order, I didn't even ask...

[crayiii]

Thank you all, I am soooooooo happy!!