Somewhat Legal question.

[Arkleron]

I feel lost. I have a son that I havn't seen since he was 2. The mother got married and moved him outta state without telling me. I've been paying child support for the last 5-7 years.

Now I understand the department of justice's laws against releasing any info on the mother, but when I ask for info on my son such as SSN#'s and full names for taxes, their like Tuff luck. I tried to talk to a lawyer but he wanted $5000 upfront.

What can I do in this situation?


Also, I want to get a paternity test done cause I felt like I was bullied into signing the birth certificate and wasn't really sure he was mine. How can I make her do that now that I live in AZ and she's in Oregon?

[Giggles]

Do you have a custody order?

Do you have a CS order?  Is it through Child support enforcement, or do you pay directly, do you have a wage withholding order?

Do you have a visitation order?

What do you need DS's SS# for?  If you are paying support and havent seen the child then it's highly unlikely that you can claim him on any taxes and CS payments are not tax deductable.

[Kent]

It's not that complicated, and yet, it's very complicated.

Apparently there is a custody order, since you're paying child support.
Did the order also specify parenting time for you?

The most important thing for you to do is: FIND HER.
If you have court ordered parenting time, you need to inform her (in writing, certified with return receipt) of your intentions to resume your parenting time.
If you do NOT have court ordered parenting time, you need to file for parenting time, obtain a court hearing in the county the child lives, have her served, and go to court.

Keep in mind that your son has no recollection of you, and your sudden appearance will put his world upside down. Don't march into his life like an elephant in a china cabinet.
Start with letters, phone calls, etc. etc.

You can also petition the court for a paternity test. However, since you signed the BC, you will not be able to get out of paying CS even if the child is not your son.

Good luck.

Kent!

[Arkleron]

As far as i know, there is NO custody. I went to court just for child support. My wages are garnished and its been like that for a while.

Now my family has told me that I can claim the garnished child support on taxes, is this not the case?

The CS goes directly to the state then turns around and sends it to the mother.

[Arkleron]

You mentioned that i need to file court in the county the child lives in? The mother moved him out of state without informing me, doesn't this give me the right to file in my state for a custody hearing?

It seems backwards if the other parent takes the child out of state and then the parent pursuing them needs to chase them down and only file in their state....

[Kent]

Backwards as it may seem, that is the case.

If you had acted within 6 months of her leaving, then you would have to file in the county the child used to live.

After 6 months, the new residence is considered the long-term residence, and therefore that court will take jurisdiction.
Only exception: If your current court order says that your court will keep jurisdiction.

Also see it from her point of view; She moves, you don't do anything about it, leave her alone for 5 years, and now that you have a change of heart, she suddenly needs to make all sorts of expenses to go to court in your state?
Doesn't sound fair either, does it?

Good luck!

Kent!

[becky]

nt

[Ref]

You CS is not tax deductible and you can NOT claim the child as a dependent. The only way you can is if you get the BM to agree to it in writing. This is true with ANY non-custodial parent. It sucks, especially when BM decides not to work and you are paying all the kids bills, but it is the rule now. Check out posts dated around April 15th on these boards and you will see some interesting discussion on it or go on the IRS webpage, irs.gov.

Good Luck with the rest

Ref