DEALING WITH GAL

[Kitty C.]

'The GAL stated "I don't want the death of this child to be the focal point of change in custody and placement". He also stated that point in itself isn't enough to warrant a change either.'

Does this guy talk around himself like this ALL the time????  Tell him to either sh** or get off the pot, it's either one or the other, but it CANNOT be both, with him being in the position of overseeing their welfare!!!!!!!  Make sure your atty. is WELL aware of what this GAL is telling you!  

[snaab93]

This is the type of c#@p I am dealing with on a daily basis.  Whenever something new comes up, I am immediately on the phone to GAL.  I am almost certain he doesn't have a clue.  

90% of info he's recieved has been hand fed.  He didn't know the children were in therapy until I told him, he didn't know the children were picked up by their Grandmother until I told him, he's been trying to interview the BM but she keeps breaking the appointments and plus she lied to him.  Also, the youngest one's behavior at school wasn't brought to his attention until I found out!!!!!!!!   He said he talked to her on the phone a week prior to me giving him this info, and I recieved the info a Month late!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My lawyer is a tolerant man with a long fuse.  He doesn't get upset over anything.  His philosophy is don't get upset, get SMART!!!!!  If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be standing with my KIDS today.  Even my lawyer is upset with this GAL.  My lawyer called him 5 X's before the GAL returned his phone call.  Plus he had to kindly remind him why and what he's doing.   Looking out for the welfare of the children.  

Yet all this that has been going hasn't any effect on his decision.

[snaab93]

I find your statments really harsh.  They may or may not hit, nor boarderline the truth but harsh in itself.  

My children are GOOD boys.  They are acting out because they have something to say and no one is listening.  The trouble is they only will talk when they feel like talking.  One can't force it out of them.  Patienct along with time will help them in the long run.  Plus getting them away from the environment they have been exposed to, such as their mothers.  

[Kitty C.]

Time for your atty. to ask the judge for a replacement GAL then.  Sounds like your atty. could make a very strong case for it......

[StPaulieGirl]

Ok, lots of people are social butterflies when they drink. Drinking does that.

The reason I asked about the bedwetting, etc. is because I found an article detailing a syndrom called the "homocidal triad", many years ago.  I wasn't looking for this info, but if fit my boy back when he was a younger kid.  He no longer engages in that type of behavior....I beat hell out of him for setting fires and hurting the dog.  That was when I was still married to his father.  He eventually quit all the above behavior....but graduated to other destructive behavior.  

You need another GAL.  Right now.  

[StPaulieGirl]

[p]I'm sorry if you took offense at my comments.

My children are GOOD boys. They are acting out because they have something to say and no one is listening. The trouble is they only will talk when they feel like talking. One can't force it out of them. Patienct along with time will help them in the long run. Plus getting them away from the environment they have been exposed to, such as their mothers.

[p]You are comitting every mistake I've ever made with my ex husband, and now my son.  We'll move...he'll find better friends!  It just takes patience!  I'll always be there if he needs to talk!

[p]Talk to me when you end up in court...liable for his monkey business.

[snaab93]

Here is the continuing saga.  I just found today that my youngest sons BM took him to see a therapist at Oneida Social Services.  I was never told about these appointments.  I called last week and they told me that no appointments were made. In part, he said he talked about my wife spanking him.  She never spanked.  I asked his older brother if he knew about that.  He said that he was lying.  When I asked my youngest one about who told him to say that, he said "Mom told me to say that".  My youngest one is 6 years old.  

I tried retrieving medical information about the sessions and they told my I would need a court order because they felt the information was detramental.  So the GAL had the medical info supoenaed.  Oneida Social Services said it was going to be a while, because they had to omit certain information.  I am not tribal, the biological mom is, how can I get this info?

[nosonew]

Our ss "acted out" due to emotional abuse by bm.  A stable and loving home can cure what ails him.  Don't give up on him, 6 is WWWAAAYYY too young for that!!

[nosonew]

As someone who has been there, done that, I wouldn't hold my breath regarding those counseling records, and even if you do get something, it will probably be a "report" by the counselor that with-holds info YOU want.  Our bm took ss to a counselor for 2 years before we found out about it (paid in cash so insurance wouldn't give it away), part of the PAS, trying to prove to counselor we abuse, physically, sexually, and emotionally.  It didn't work, and in the "report" it stated any and all notes could not be released as "bm was afraid of retaliation by dad".  Hmmm, wonder what those notes say???  That was 7, yes SEVEN years ago, and WE still don't have them!  But we do have ss, so even without that info, the good guy can still win.

I hope you do get them, AND I suggest YOU make an appt with counselor to meet and DISCUSS IN PERSON what has been going on.  My dh and I went, she verbally told us alot, but wouldn't put it in writing. She also interviewed my son, who was also being accused of abuse. and FOUND ALL OF US to be nothing like she EXPECTED, (per her words), and stated she felt that mother had "anxiety and separation difficulties" and that WE should TRY to help BM with this stuff!  Hello, she can kiss our @ss!  Keep in mind these bm's do this to TURN you into an evil demon in the eyes of the counselor, so make an appt and show that you actually have a halo over your head instead of horns!  Also, maybe your counselor will see that bm is full of __it, and will more readily release records.  

Another thing:  Can it not be said that if someone lies to cover up a murder, they will lie about ANYTHING!  Hello!  I hope your judge has a bit more common sense than your GAL.  You may have to point this out as some people may just miss this very obvious point.  How can ANYTHING she says be trusted?  

[snaab93]

Thank you for your support!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I like to believe the half full theory regardless of the circumstance.  Evening attending nursing school, working part-time, and spending countless hours in clinicals, I still believe there is more I could contribute to the KIDS than time allows.  Once again, thank you.