custody issue for scared dad/his family

[determined]

1.  Because all of these things take an inordinate amount of
     time, I would go ahead with things in NY, but I wouldn't
     concede on MA in the meantime.

2.  Middlesex County has district courts in Ayer, Concord,
     Framingham, Lowell, Malden, Marlborough, Natick, Newton,
     Waltham and Woburn (believe me, I got dragged into most
     of them by an ex who was forum shopping for a better
     answer).  

     If you were stymied in one of these, go down to Cambridge.
     It is the Superior Court, at least half of the Judges in District
     Court go through Cambridge at some point, and the worst
     excesses of the Middlesex Court have at least started in the
     Districts where it is easier to pull shenanigans without anybody
     else noticing.

3.  Cambridge Court has a "lawyer of the day" that you can sign
     up to see.  He is sitting just outside of the registrar's office on
     the second or third floor (I think it is the second floor, but in
     any case it is well marked).  You might try asking him if you
     are in there anyways.

4.  Most all lawyers around here will give you a free consultation.  
     They are looking to drum up business and you needn't express
     to them any concerns about affordability until after they have
     given you a knowledgeable response to the issue of jurisdiction.
     I'm not qualified to pontificate on the subject, but a "former
     sitting judge" certainly sounds qualified to me.

5.  As a Father who feels "beat round the head" by the system, I
     really have sympathy with your husband in that he is not at all
     excited at the prospect of going into court.  But if the two of
     you are persistent and have "right" on your side, sometimes
     you can prevail.  Unfortunately it took me over seven years
     (but I did not persist at first, only after I finally realized that
     the alternatives in my case were worse than the pain of dealing
     with a broken court system)

[wendl]

well tonight I don't have any great advice (sorry not feeling well)
HOWEVER--I am a stepmom too and WELCOME to Sparc.

I can say document everything tape phone calls if allowed in your state.

Many here can give you great advice, when you feel you are at your witts ends, come vent she won't blow you over.

Good luck:-)

[determined]

Be careful.  MA is a two party state (both parties MUST consnet to taping of recording).

[mbatde]

hi, all.

We have some news, and it mights be good.  We hired a lawyer to just assist us with filling out paper work, assessing what we need to do to "prove" our right, and assist us with the schools (they still refuse to give us records, and refuse to give us her personal items. they also refuse to go thru the *B.S.* Mass process of notifying the CP and giving them the option to provide proff of restraining order\, etc.)
Well, he is Lic in MA and NY.

He initially told us we had little chance, being that the order was from so long ago, and my husband never "disputed it" Once he read the 45 page fax i sent him, he seems to think that we have grounds to have it seem in Middlesex county !!!! In MA!

So, we will go in there on our own Monday and file for custody and emergency temp order,  and see what happens.  Worst case, they will give us an order refusing jurisdiction, and that will prove to Erie that they HAVE to hear it.  Ya'll know best case would mean we get her back till there is a final judgement.

And, if this doesnt work the lawyer will still help us with the rest of it on the MA end, and we can get the assigned counsel in ny.  I am pretty positive that we have to go to NY anyways, but this MIGHT work, and then the other court CANT refuse jurisdiction.

Does it "LOOK BAD" to have a court appointed lawyer? Could that come back on us as not being able to provide for the child?

Thanks for everyones advice.  Reading all of the thoughts and advice on this site entirely, gave me a real leg up as far as knowing what info would be helpoful to the lawyer, and what was not.  THANKS!

One more ?.  If we get a temp order  of custody, what do we do?  Go to NY and get her?  Some Police wont get involved.  My husb has full legal custody of his oldest son, who the mother just convinced to "stay" with her.  He is 16.  The same police that took lecia, or forced us to let her go, will NOT go get his son.  No sense in that!
Just curious.  i dont want to drive 1500 miles to find out the police wont enforce the order.

thanks, AMY

[determined]

I never heard the suggestion that it "looks bad" to have a court appointed lawyer.  

[mbatde]

I guess what i SHOULD have said was: Does it look bad to have a Court Appointed lawyer based on having a low income?

We arent poor, and our bills are paid.  We just cant afford the retainers.  The lawyer we are hiring in ma said that it might make an obvious statement that we cant AFFORD this other child.