Should we involve Child Protective Services

[lilp777]

I have a 4 year old SD who lives with her mother (CP).  CP got custody in August.  At the time SD, DH and I were living in TX, and when SD had to go to CP's in GA,  DH and I also moved.  CP has moved SD into and out of BF home 5 times since August.  The BF has a documented past of family violence and a violent temper in general.  (The judge was aware of this.)  Custody papers state that no one of the opposite sex may be in the home overnight with SD.  Obviously BF is there every night since it is his home.  After being suckered for $2000 from our attorney we do not want to get another one.  But it is becoming increasing evident that someone besides my DH and I need to become involved in SD welfare.  CP has been warned about living with BF.  SD has spoken several times of the BF spanking her with belts and paddles.  SD has witnessed at least two violent outbursts that CP denies.  BF also watches SD while CP is at work, typically late night shifts.  Obviously we would love a change in the current custody arrangement but considering the judge pulled SD out of a stable loving home and moved her across country we don't think we would be successful.  However, due to the overall well being of SD would anyone recommend getting Child Protective Services involved?  

[tulip]

I'm curious, why did the court take her from the home she was living in?

I would call CPS in the area they live, and report that sd has told you she is being spanked with belts and paddles. I don't know what guidlines they have to follow to determine abuse, so you should at least call and ask them.

If CP is in contempt of the court order, file contempt charges against her.

[lilp777]

We do not know why the judge removed her from our home.  Everyone we knew was shocked.  She had been registered for school and had been in a stable home for a year.  She had lived with her mother for the first three years then her mother sent her to live in our home because the BF beat her up and kicked her out.  CP does have a son with the BF, that is the ONLY reason we could think as to why.  CP even lied under oath and it was proven.  

[wendl]

be carefull when calling CPS, don't have DH call them, they really don't take what a NCP says to heart, it's better coming from some one else.

Wish I had more to tell you.

Continue to document document document.

[Kitty C.]

Generally, CPS won't listen to an NCP because they know custody issues are involved.  What you need are 3rd party reports, like from her teachers.  Inform the school of your concerns and if you have a good rapport with her teacher, sit down and have a heart-to-heart with him/her.  All school employees are mandatory reporters and if they even suspect abuse is going on, they are mandated by law to report it.

And if it is reported by them, it will carry more weight than if you reported it.

[lilp777]

Thank you for all your advice.  I am so thankful that summer is almost here so she will be in our home for a few months.  Luckily we got full summer visitation even though NCP and CP live within 20 miles of each other.  

[wendl]

well hmm since you only live 20 miles from eachother, is there anyway your sd can call you late at night when BF is watching her, you could call the police and inform them or have them do a welfare child check, that way if BF is watching child you will have it in a report.

Just a thought.

Also could try hiring a PI

[lilp777]

We have thought of both ideas.  We are currently in the process of teaching her phone numbers and number recognition so she can call us when she needs something.  Her mother does not work with her on such things so its taking us twice as long to help her learn.  

As for the PI he would be after a long list of expenses we still need to pay related to the first time in court.  But thanks for the suggestions.