15 yr old daughter wants to come live with Dad

[overseaesdad]

I recieved a letter from my daughter, saying she wants to come live with me.  My problem is that I am in Germany and her BM lives in Florida.  Any suggestions?

[ocean]

What does her mother say about this? What is your current court orders state?

[overseaesdad]

The current order states that " The parties shall share joint custody of the children and placement of the children shall be with the mother.
I do not believe that my daughter has told her mother.  reason is before I left for overseas, she had wanted to go with me, but at the last minute changed her mind.........    I am not sure if it was her decision not to go .

[Bolivar OH]

I do not know the relationship you have with the other parent.  However, in order of easiest to hardest:

    1. Work out something with Mom.
    2. Go to court and modify visitation.

I am reluctant to even mention this last one because it is almost impossible to do.
    3. Go to court and try to change your custody status.


The Childs wishes are just one of many items considered by the court.

Check out the this sites FAQ stuff.  

Here's one link I think you'll be interested in:

At what age can my child decide who he/she wants to live with?
http://www.deltabravo.net/faq/cust_ans3.htm

[overseaesdad]

thank you for this information, I will review it and hopefully it will guide me in what to do.

[Lawmoe]

Visitation time and custody issues are determined based on a best interests of the child standard.  Bests interests are determined by a Court by applying various factors spelled out in your state's statutes.  Those factors are not exclusive and the Court must consider the totality of all circumstances.  

One of those factors is the wishes of the minor child, assuming the child is old enough to express his/her desires.  The child's wishes are generally not dispositive on the issue and are weighed as only one factor out of many.  As the child matures, their opinions will carry greater weight.   For example, in the State of Tennessee, the statutes allow the Court to consider the reasonable preference of any child age twelve (12) or older.  The court, at its discretion, may also hear the preference of a younger child upon request by a party. However, the preferences of older children are given greater weight than those of younger children. Most states have similar laws, some  more vague than others.  Minnesota allows the Court to consider the preference of a child if the Court deems the child to be of suitable age and maturity.

There are some states that do give greater weight to a child's desires, although such state statutes  are an exception to the rule.  In the State of Georgia, state  statutes provide – "In all cases in which the child has reached the age of 14 years, the child shall have the right to select the parent with  whom he or she desires to live. The child's selection shall be controlling, unless the parent so selected is determined not to be a fit and proper person to have the custody of the child."

Remember, so long was there is an existing Court order requiring parenting time and telephone calls to occur, they must occur.   If they do not, the parent who does not support the contact may be found in contempt.  An Order may only be modified by filing a Motion and acquiring an Order with a different ruling.