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Husband fighting for custody....claiming unstable mental state, federal charges

Started by hj92562, Jun 03, 2009, 12:34:28 PM

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hj92562

I am coming to the end of a very bitter divorce and am less than a week away from my trial date to finalize everything.  I was just informed by my attorney that now my husband is planning to fight for custody (I was awarded temporary sole custody based on testimony by affidavit).  He has threatened my family members that he is bringing witnesses that will testify about my mental state and is also bringing me up on federal charges (I'm very confused about what these would be....).  I have dealt with threats like this throughout our marriage (15 years) and especially since we have separated.  In addition, he only sat through one mediation appointment and cancelled the remaining one.

How much weight will a judge put on his claims?  I have literally raised our kids by myself and have exclusively dealt with a son with mental health issues.  All these threats and baseless claims have put some serious undue stress on the kids, which makes just being a kid hard to do.

Any thoughts?

ksmarks

Sole custody, even temporay is pretty serious, have there been any chances since that award?  What does your attorney tell you?  Any clue as to what the mental health concerns are regarding you? and the federal charges?

Advice, try to keep as much of this a possible away from the kids and say nothing negative about the ex to the kids or around them, and don't let anyone else either. 
KSMarks

DadsCrushed

Only a psychiatrist can state that you have mental issue and/or unstable. Until he provides something concrete, I would put no credence into his assertions. Let him come into court making these claims without proof and see how the court responds.

ksmarks

KSMarks

grtdaddy

Quote from: DadsCrushed on Jun 05, 2009, 09:57:24 AM
Only a psychiatrist can state that you have mental issue and/or unstable. Until he provides something concrete, I would put no credence into his assertions. Let him come into court making these claims without proof and see how the court responds.

i would not follow this advise, while maybe only a psychiatrist may diagnose you, i would imagine witness testimony can help prove stability issues. if it were me i would have a back-up plan rather than just relying on "the court will respond the way i think". talk to your lawyer first and foremost. goodluck.

hj92562


gemini3

Quote from: grtdaddy on Jun 05, 2009, 12:44:57 PM
Quote from: DadsCrushed on Jun 05, 2009, 09:57:24 AM
Only a psychiatrist can state that you have mental issue and/or unstable. Until he provides something concrete, I would put no credence into his assertions. Let him come into court making these claims without proof and see how the court responds.

i would not follow this advise, while maybe only a psychiatrist may diagnose you, i would imagine witness testimony can help prove stability issues. if it were me i would have a back-up plan rather than just relying on "the court will respond the way i think". talk to your lawyer first and foremost. goodluck.

What do you base this on?  Usually third party witness testimony is difficult to introduce because of hearsay rules.  They can't go into court and say, for example, "I hear the defendant call so-and-so and you-know-what while they were jumping on a trapolene in a kangaroo suit."  That is hearsay and inadmissable.

In my experience, if the court feels there may be mental health issues or one side claims that there is, they will order psych evaluations.  If the court does order an eval I would have your attorney fight to have BOTH parties evaluated equally, and that the party requesting the eval be responsible for payment.

MomofTwo

The problem with third party testimony is  it only what they ALLEGE they witnessed, it is not proven in any way. 

Only a licensed medical professional can diagnose, but if you have enough people testifying to your actions, it could lend to the courts being concerned about mental health issues.  I would like to believe the courts are pretty savy about knowing when this is true and of concern as opposed to a ploy by someone to gain custody, but not always. 

I definitely agree with Geminis recommendation that if a mental health evaluation is ordered, fight as hard as you can to make it for both parties and the party who wanted it be responsible for the payment of it. 

Temporary orders are just that, temporary, but it usually gives you good insight of what the final outcome will be.  The fact they gave him no custody speaks volumes, but don't rest on those laurels.   Judges like to keep the status quo, if when you separated he walked out on the kids, and you have been the only one parenting this entire time, judges do not like to mess with what is working.

One last thing, your original post said you were awarded sole custody due to affadavits...if you can get those people to come testify on your behalf, that will substantially better then a written affadavit from them.

grtdaddy

Quote from: gemini3 on Jun 06, 2009, 05:48:55 AM
Quote from: grtdaddy on Jun 05, 2009, 12:44:57 PM
Quote from: DadsCrushed on Jun 05, 2009, 09:57:24 AM
Only a psychiatrist can state that you have mental issue and/or unstable. Until he provides something concrete, I would put no credence into his assertions. Let him come into court making these claims without proof and see how the court responds.

i would not follow this advise, while maybe only a psychiatrist may diagnose you, i would imagine witness testimony can help prove stability issues. if it were me i would have a back-up plan rather than just relying on "the court will respond the way i think". talk to your lawyer first and foremost. goodluck.

What do you base this on?  Usually third party witness testimony is difficult to introduce because of hearsay rules.  They can't go into court and say, for example, "I hear the defendant call so-and-so and you-know-what while they were jumping on a trapolene in a kangaroo suit."  That is hearsay and inadmissable.

In my experience, if the court feels there may be mental health issues or one side claims that there is, they will order psych evaluations.  If the court does order an eval I would have your attorney fight to have BOTH parties evaluated equally, and that the party requesting the eval be responsible for payment.

i am basing it on the fact of how eye witness testimony convicts people of crimes everyday. hearsay i always thought was having someone actually not witness an act but give an opinion on what they may have heard. for instance, abuse, neglect of a child. Do you believe a court would not allow eye witness testimony to these factors? I never said they will allow someone to diagnose a person, but if someone is mentally ill that can fall under both examples i have put down for testimony. I wouldn't walk into court just figuring they can't use it unless of course my lawyer advised me not to worry about it. thats also why i said talk to your lawyer first and foremost.

hj92562

I did do some investigation on my own because my husband claimed that he had someone from my former place of employment who would testify against me.  In speaking to the HR director there (who is a very good friend and wrote an initial affidavit for me), she couldn't find anyone who would touch things with a ten foot pole.

In addition, if there were supposed "federal charges" against me, don't you think that I would have known about something by now?  It just seems like this is a desperate action considering I've done 110% of the parenting the entire time.  In addition, I think that much of this stems from the fact that I recently took a job back in my hometown 4 hours away where I have tons of family and access to mental health services for my son.  I have to believe that a judge will look on that favorably.