Welcome to SPARC Forums. Please login or sign up.

Jun 15, 2024, 02:58:37 AM

Login with username, password and session length

visitation with no child support?

Started by lwyphan, Sep 21, 2009, 10:29:44 AM

Previous topic - Next topic


Not mom's problem that he has a warrant out for his arrest. At this point IF there is an active warrant out, he should not be driving the child anywhere. If he gets pulled over, he will be arrested and child will be taken from him anyway. Call the local sheriff and make sure they can do something about it, then let dad deal with it. By putting him in jail, may wake him up to start paying. Not mom's responsibility to deal with dad and find a way to get him to pay.


You know -- when folks are in jail or in prison, they can participate in work-release programs and then the CS will get paid.

I'm on the side of not sending a parent to jail for any infraction....even contempt for missed time, there are other ways to make them feel their mistakes.


I guess you have to ask yourself what's more important-Your child having a relationship with their father or a monthly check.


Not really...the warrant was made from the state for non-payment. It will catch up to him sooner or later. I would rather make sure the child was not with him when it happens (not deny visitation, but let him deal with the arrest, next times he comes to pick up child, child goes...).  Is it better for mom to send child and wonder if the sheriff office will call her to come get child because dad was arrested?

I also think that the laws need to change and work out a better system of dealing with non-payment BUT this is what this mother is dealing with now...


Quote from: eagleeyefam on Sep 23, 2009, 04:55:41 PM
I guess you have to ask yourself what's more important-Your child having a relationship with their father or a monthly check.

The flip side for the NCP:

Which one is more important, the kid or the money?  Because everytime the NCP chooses not to pay child support especially if they are paying none), they are choosing money over their kids. 

Sorry, but BOTH are equally important.   The kid needs a place to live.  The kid needs heat and light, the kid needs food, the kid needs clothes. 


Quote from: ocean on Sep 23, 2009, 04:59:45 PM

I also think that the laws need to change and work out a better system of dealing with non-payment BUT this is what this mother is dealing with now...

I think that if every single court were to actually enforce the existing laws, there would be payment.  In states that are extremely strict with enforcement, there is very little non-payment of child support compared to other states that are lax in their collection.   The problem is that most states don't enforce non-payment as strictly as they should. 


Yeah, as ugly as it sounds, I am going to have no choice but to set up a pick up or drop off time and have the sheriff meet instead of myself.  I am certain that he is avoiding legitimate employment in order to skirt the payment of his child support.  He finds work here and there that pays under the table instead of obtaining steady employment.

If I don't do something, this will go on forever.  I am not putting money over DD's relationship with her father.  But the fact of the matter is, we are struggling as well.  I have spoken with him on multiple occaisions regarding this issue and have expressed understanding to him that the economy is poor and I know he's having trouble.  But it's been over 6 months since he made any attempt at paying his child support and enough is enough.  His home is a poor environment for her and I rather she weren't exposed to it.  He's an alcoholic and I'm pretty sure drugs are involved (or so I am hearing).

What I have decided to do is just to tell him that he is welcome to pick her up for visitation, but that I am calling the sheriff to enforce the outstanding warrant.  If he chooses not to come get her, then that is on him.  I won't deny visitation.  But I will clearly state my intentions.  He will avoid seeing her himself just to get out of this situation.  He won't man up and take care of the problem.  I'll be interested to see how long he'll be willing to let this go unresolved before he takes care of it just to see her.


You dont know where he lives? Cant you call the sheriff and send them there? Otherwise you will be waiting every weekend with her waiting to see if he shows up and then she will be there to witness it.


I think it is a huge mistake for you to be the driving force behind arresting the other parent.  Moreover, you're using and manipulating the access to the child to effect an arrest. 

No doubt both you and law enforcement know where this hardened criminal can be found and apprehended (probably 24 x 7) and you simply do not need the drama of the child's presence.   LE may not go along with your gamesmanship with the child nearby.

Otherwise, there are other alternatives that would benefit your child in both the short anf long run.

This is clearly a LE issue and you are NOT LE.


She is not the driving force, he did it to himself. Once she found out about the warrant it is up to her to protect their child from witnessing it. He needs to deal with this. I do agree with you about HOW she wants to tell him. She can just say that she knows there is an active warrant out for his arrest and he needs to clear it up so the child is not involved in it. This is different then him owing her money and keeping child from him. He has an arrest warrant out from the state, not her.

Did you call the sheriff to see if they will do anything and to make sure it is an active warrant that they have jurisdiction over?