Posting for a friend...

[lucky]

Ok, here is the info as far as I know it...

Dad & Mom married several years, they have 3 boys 5/6 & under and one daughter (YD) about 8 who was from Mom's prior relationship, but Dad has legally adopted.  Dad has one daughter (OD) who is 19/20 yo from his prior marriage.

Mom has been physically assaultive to OD (it's kind of mutual) and they both have court cases pending against them.  Mom has denied everything, but recently the youngest boy spilled his guts to Dad about what he witnessed happening.  Mom refuses to allow OD to set foot in the house now.

Dad & Mom argue a LOT, most of the time with the kids around.

Dad owned the house prior to marriage and deed is in his name only as well as mortgage.  Mom has not worked throughout the marriage until approximately two months ago and she quit that job after several weeks.  She is licensed as an RN.  She has threatened to take the kids and everything he has away from him if they end up in a divorce.

Mom has been diagnosed with schizophrenia but is not med compliant.  Even when she does take her meds, she doesn't always take them like she is supposed to.

Dad has been talking about possible divorce for a while, but isn't prepared to go that far yet.

Last week Mom was admitted to the psych ward of the local hospital, she might be released today or tomorrow, but also might be admitted elsewhere for a 30 day evaluation.  Since her admission happened, OD has been staying with Dad and helping with the younger kids.

Dad is afraid for his and the kids' safety if she comes home.  He filed for an OFP, however, the judge denied it saying that Dad's reasons didn't meet the requirement threshold.

Minnesota allows legal separation but there aren't any forms specific to that published - just divorce forms.  I honestly don't think he can really afford an attorney, but we're going to recommend that he contact one if only for a consult.  I also found Temporary Relief with Children forms which ARE divorce forms, but not for final orders.  I'm going to print them out for him as well and explain to him that it isn't the final step of divorce, they could always withdraw the Divorce petition, but it'll get him in a stable place where he & the kids would be/feel safe.  I'm recommending that he ask for the house, the suburban (not paid off - and she can't pay it), legal/physical custody with supervised visitation with a supervisor of HIS choice or in a supervision center.

Does anyone have any other input/ideas that I could pass on to him?

[ocean]

Few things.....
1. Have him call hospital where she is and tell them he is not accepting her back into house at this time until she gets help. She would need a place to go or someone to take her "home". This will force the hospital to get her other housing.

2. Go get temporary emergency custody of the kids....mom is hospitalized and dad is afraid mom will sign herself out and take kids from school.

Not sure why he did not get RO, needed to use the wording from #2. Depending on the laws of your state, she may be able to get some money for house even with just his name on it. Call the local police and find out if he can legally change the locks on the house. See what they would do if she came to the house and he refused to allow her in.

Have him get ALL the proof he can NOW of this admission, diagnosis, medications she is supposed to be on...etc... (any discharge papers from the past, medical papers around house...).

Does OD have an RO in place? If she is living there...that could make mom stay away...