When you just can't get along

[MixedBag]

Davy -- this deserves it's own thread...

Sending condolences!

[Krystal44]

There is a lot of good advice for this stuff in narcissistic and emotional abuse websites. There is a video on youtube that talks about just becoming "boring." Basically you answer all questions with the most boring thing you can think of. Like, "how was your day? what did you do?" Your reply would go into extreme detail about doing the dishes and folding laundry and so on. These types of people thrive on drama and conflict. They know they are lying and trying to gas-light you when they tell you completely incorrect versions of your fights and encounters. They know it will catch your goat every single time. Its infuriating when they lie to you about something you were there to witness and both of you know it's a lie but he says it's not. They know that it's infuriating. Dont care. If you do care, don't let them know. Ignore the lies in the emails. Agree with the lies in person where it cannot be used against you. Unfortunately you have to do a little manipulating of your own to deal with people like this. Once you've become too boring, they will find a new victim to create drama with. Usually it happens pretty quickly. Hang in there.

[sunbarbie]

I found to be as boring as possible in emails.  I often use the same response over and over again.  So far this method has worked.   I constantly ask myself is child bothered by this or that, more often the answer is no.  So I don't counter.  Last email was a doozy, and I took some time to respond to get professional advice before I responded, i thought there was some kind of abuse going on, but it was just a parenting tactic they used, nothing I would do, not abuse just different.  Glad I waited and asked.