custody

[unsureaboutthings]

hello im new to this and wanted to get some general advice. relative going though a separation and custody is a big issue. children 5 & 9 currently, are in the care of their mother. no reason why not, good mother, children safe, happy. father is a shift worker. child support paid ever fn ontime. as he is a shift worker hard to arrange set days when he sees shildren. admit has been unwilling to commit to days/avos, father has ofetn gone month a time with no communication with children or seing them for weeks on end.

father after 3 months separated has new partner now wants to have children 2 nights a fn but not necessarily when he is off. he wnats to reduce his child support he has to pay, but the 2 nights a fn he wanst them he may be at work, either 10hrs day shifts or 12hrs night shift. he proposes that his new partner look after the children. they have only meet new partner 3 times so far, mother more than willing to work with father roster and offered father to have children when he is off, her only concern is that he has them when he is foo so children actually get to spend time with father, if he is at work she sees no point in them being at his house with new partner. she offered him to pick up children after work and take them then back to his house.

he refuses, he says she is still trying to tell him what to do. he sees no reason why children cant be at his house while he is at work and be looked after by his new partner, mother says he should be there. dates were given by mother where she agreed for children to spend overnight on days he was off. he wanst to be able to maybe work overtime days he may have them, or not have to be off work and let new partner look after children. what are his chances of getting a court order that says even though he is a shift worker, he can have children 2 nights a fn, and have his new partner of 3 mths look after them??

would hate to see them go to court, but mother doesnt see why he cant just have them when he if off, she is more than willing to accomodate this, as reason children will be with father not because she cant have thme, but so they spend quality time with father, he wanst to reduce child support payments and also give his new partner his trust in letting her look after his children. has anyone ever heard of any decisons where shift working parents have custody of children even when working?? and children are looked after a third party??

[ocean]

How about compromise? Let them sleep there the night before you he off so they are there the whole time he is off. If they get married, they will be allowed to stay there some time without father just like when mom has custody she is not always with children. Now if he is gone ALL day, they should be with mom so get First Right of Refusal in papers if they go back to court. It says "If either parents needs a babysitter for more than 3 hours (you can change the hours) then the other parent must be called first above other family members and step parents.

[Spaceman1982]

in my experience, our judge doesnt like the non-custodial (mom) to not be with children during her time off. Before she was placed on supervised visits she was trying to get more time and wanted to go from me having primary to a weird thing she had dreamed up where she had them 3 out of 4 weekends. My attorney at the time had asked her for amusement purposes if she was working, she said yes, he asked if she worked weekends, she said often. Our judge told her besides the fact that she had no grounds to change custody, why would he give her more time to not use. she replied that I worked at nights (I was a salesman at time) and judge told her that was fine and dandy but I had to support my kids being primary and the kids are getting staright A's so it was mute to him.