Has anyone used a GAL?

[backwardsbike]

We have been separated/divorced for nine years.  We have two children DS 17 DD 14.  We have been to court os often I considered going to law school.  So far we have had two cusotdy evlautions, ran through two mediators and now have a counsleor for Cp and me (NCM).


Cp does not want me in the children's lives.  Ihave been fighting for nine years to maintian realtionships witht he children.  Both CP adn I have remearried.  The kids hated his new wife when she came on the scene adn movedin, literaly adn figuartively.  I encouraged them to get along with her.

My new husband has a serious mental health condition.  In the past he had been violent although not against me. We also have two children to gether.  A DS 8 and DD 4.  Both of our children flourish in our home.  My DH is a stay at home dad and I am a grad student working part time.  I suffered a disabilng back conditon.  Prior to this I was a psychiatric nurse adn parent educator for 25 years.

X calls CYS on us and makes all sorts of false accusations.  The most recent call was this past summer when my DH had to be voluntairily admitted to a mental health hospital for a change in his medication regime.  X's cry was "He's unstable, myhcildren are scared to death!."  Cys found us in need of NO SERVICES and closed the case.

Six days later, after refusing to change a night for weekenght visit to accomadate my classs chedule my X filed a petiton stating the children told him my DH was drinking during thier visit and that they were afraid for thier saftey.  They said they called dad for an early pick up.  My DH says my X did call here adn asked if he could pick the kids up at our home but Dh said, "anywhere but here adn they argeed on a convience store about a .25 miles away.  We do not generally allow X on our propety due to his propensity to make false allegations.  We prefer to do excahnges where there are wintesses.  The judge has affimred this by order to exchange at a specific point.  But we have doen excahnges in other pubil places when it was more convinent.  My Dh adn my aunt who was here for the entire vist say the visit ended exactly on time adn that no drinking had occurred.

X's oetition asked for vists to be ssupended pending the hearing.  The judge didn't realize he suspended the visits when he scheduled the hearing.  OC had included a draft order adn the judge signed it without reading it.  I lost one visit when I found out I called my attorney who callthe the judge the next Monday dn the judge recinded this adn gave me a make up weeknd to return things tot the staus quo.  Visits have been rocky since htis happened.  Prior tot hat including the weeknd following the supposed drunk driving fiasco my kids came for thier visits and seemed happy.  Had friends stay in our home with them for weekends, inculded Dh and the tow younger kids in a skating party we had for DD's 14th Bday. In short they showed no fear at all.  But in court they tell the judge all sorts of fantasitc tales that dad has primed them up for.

We went to court for the hearign on this petiton this week.  Judge appointed a GAL for the children.  Nothing was changed in the order.  X had beens eeking for the hcildren not to spend time with Dh alone.  We wnet thru that during the first custody eval. I had to hire caregivers to stay in myhome while I worked although when the NC kids weren't here Dh stayed alone with our own tow younger, more vuleralbe kids.  Once the $$$ for the caregivers was coming out of the child support I paid X an evalaution was ordered which said DH was capable of taking care of all four kids while I was away formt he home.  That was three years ago and X has never been able to accept it.

So what I am seeking here is any advice anyone can offer on using a GAL.  The GAL will be an attorney and the judge tells me he will have the authority to invstigate the children's concerns.  Judge said, "The GAL will be for the kids but it won't be a process they are in charge of"

X had a tendency to show children all court documents.  He shows them emails betweenhe adn I and they claim to have read emails between me adn my attorney but refuse to say how they accomplished this. Dad tells them his version of everythign that ever goes on in custody confrences or hearings of any kind.  he doies this in the name of keepingthe hcildren informed.  I am the oppoiste adn when questioned about why I am doing such and such legally will say,"Its an adult matter adn I will work it out with your dad. I am doing it becasue I think its best for you."  The kids see this as me lying to them.

[dipper]

A GAL was appointed for my stepson earlier this year.  He didnt do much the first go around.  But, when all came to pass that we had foretold, he finally got on the ball and investigated.  Custody was reversed.

Just be open with him/her......hopefully he/she will see past what is going on....