Does full custody equal full control???

[melissa3]

How much control does a parent with full custody have? I'm asking because BM now has full custody and, because she's vindictive, I'm sure she's going to use it to make hell for DH.  (Yeah, I mean more than she has already.)

Another thing, BM moved so we're only going to see SD EOW. DH and I want to have a lot of fun things planned for when she comes. For instance, I started horseback riding lessons and would love to have SD come with me when she's here. But can DH just sign SD up for activities himself or does he need permission from BM, even though it's on his time? Also, what happens if there's an emergency and we can't get a hold of BM or she can't get down here?

Once lost, is it possible for a parent to gain custody back?

[WHN]

She has full physical AND legal custody, or just physical..?  

Physical custody does not mean you have the power at all.  It just means that the child lives with the person w/full physical custody full time while having visitation with the other parent.  If your husband has visitation rights, then I have no idea why he wouldn't be able to do as he pleases with said time.  Signing her up for horseback riding lessons doesn't seem like something most parents would cause trouble with, but you should probably check the court orders to see if there are any strange stipulations when it comes to that kind of thing.  
In an emergency, for instance if it's a life and death situation, the father can make decisions.

For instance if my step kids were at a park with their mother and one of them had to go to the hospital where she had a major medical decision to be made, if she couldn't get ahold of us or she had to make the decision on the spot to save the childs life, she is allowed that.  If she wanted to have something like a cosmetic surgery or something like that done, that's different.  She can't go having moles removed or major dental work that's not an immediate emergency or anything of that sort done without the father's written consent.  

It really all just depends on what your husbands court order is, though, in the end.  

Did he actually lose custody of his daughter or did he just lose physical custody...?  
From what little I have read and asked about I've gathered that if there is a good reason to change the situation, then there can be changes.  Example: My husband has full custody of his kids.  His ex has visitation rights that are very limited because she lives in an unsafe environment and has unhealthy habits to expose her children to.  Her kids are never allowed at her house for any length of time, let alone overnights...That completely takes away any chance she has of gaining any amount of physical custody.  If she were to move, prove she was not using drugs and had a safe home for her kids to be in, we would go back to mediation, she would lay out her case and they'd discuss what is reasonable visitation given her changes.  So yes, she could get joint physical custody if she straightened up and we went back to court to fight about it.  It's not as likely given her past and I'm not sure why your husband would've actually lost custody, so I can't tell you more than that and even that's probably different state to state.
Again, the best bet is to look over the court orders and see where he stands.  If you are really in doubt, ask an attorney.  

[BeachBum22]

HI!

DH lost custody at trial because he couldnt prove he wasn't on drugs. In MA, if a parent has a substance abuse problem for any length of time, then they lose custody. In our situation, DH had a prescription, failed a drug test because of it and becuase the courts think they always know what's best, they ordered him to undergo a substance abuse eval. just to be sure he wasn't "dangerous." We couldnt afford the evaluation though so I guess they thinks he's unfit (???) even though there's no evidence f him EVER hurting or neglecting his child. (!!??!!)

He would like to have legal custody again......

[mistoffolees]

You need to clarify whether you're talking about legal custody or physical custody. Essentially:

Physical custody defines where the child lives and who takes care of their physical needs when they're there. Generally, if the court assigns full physical custody to one parent, it will also assign a vistation schedule for the other parent.

Neither parent can interfere with the other parent's physical custody rights. For example, let's say your divorce decree says you get every other weekend. The CP can not schedule anything during your every other weekend. Likewise, you can not insist on doing something with the child on a day you are not scheduled by your court order. Of course, you can (and should) discuss voluntary exceptions. For example, let's say your child is invited to a party on one of your weekends. The CP should call and ask if it's OK to accept the invitation - and you would be the one to take the child to the party. Simiilarly, let's say your child is a huge football fan and the SuperBowl is in your town and you win tickets. It would be entirely reasonable to ask to take the child to the SuperBowl even if it's not your weekend.

Legal custody is quite different. If one parent has sole legal custody, they have the right to make all decisions about what the child should do with respect to school, religion, doctors, and so on. Sole legal custody would give them the right to move to a different state (or possibly even different country) unless it's specifically forbidden by the court.

Joint legal custody means that the two parents should joinly decide on any important issue, but in practice, each of them can make the decision themselves. Another common outcome is that the person with primary physical custody often ends up making the majority of decisions even though they should all be made jointly.

Now, you get into a gray area. What if the mother has sole legal custody and you have visitation every other weekend (not uncommon). In principle, you can do whatever you want on your visitation weekend as long as it does not pose any danger to the child. This could be amusement parks, eating out, sightseeing, fishing, whatever. But the mother (since she has sole legal custody) might say that horseback riding is too dangerous and refuse to allow it. I don't have any idea how the courts would rule on that one. If you were proposing bungie jumping, I could imagine the courts siding with the mother. My own gut feel says that horseback riding would be OK as long as it's a place that caters to riding for inexperienced people, but I don't know for sure.

I would suggest that you contact the Socrateaser board with your questions. You'll need to tell him exactly what your agreement says with respect to custody. Also, make sure to make sure your questions are very clear and that you use short paragraphs per his terms.

Good luck.