Is 50/50 parenting time really best for kids?

[flgs228]

I am wondering if people can refer me to good research on 50/50 parenting times. I have done my own search and has not find good resources. Most people say that it is best that kids spend with both parents but I am wondering what are the conditions for that to be true. I have had that schedule with my ex since we got divorced 6 years ago but last year I remarried and my husband has a son the same age than mine (they are both almost 7). The boys get along really well they play together all the time, and my new step son has been a great influence for my son too. Since things changed around my house, we are a family and do everything as a family. I make sure we treat both kids equally too. My son seems to be straggling with having to go with his father now, not wanting to go and when he comes back he is displaying some disruptive behavior that I haven't seen before. I almost think it would be best if my son sees his dad less often now so he can be with a real family most of his time and just visit with his dad once a week and not overnight and once every other weekend. His dad is still single and living along.

Thanks,
F

[ocean]

Yikes.....
First, his father is his REAL family. Just because you remarried is not a reason for a modification.

Find out why your son is acting that way. Maybe he can bring a friend to his fathers and have a sleepover? Maybe if you all get along he can come home after school on dad's week to be with step brother until dad gets home for work? Your son is seeing that you guys are having fun when he is not there but encourage him to have fun at dad's. Send him with his toys/games. At 7, they do not make these choices. As he gets older, and involved in activities, teen friends, jobs you will need to work together to make things work.

Does dad see an issue? Maybe a different version on how you are doing 50/50 would work? How do you split up the time now?

[tigger]

And if the roles were reversed and Dad had remarried with a wife and stepchild, would you think it were fair for your son to spend more time over there with the "real" family and less time with you?