Please help! My wife's attorneys have stall and stall.

[jcolt]

5 months later and I have went without seeing my now 8 month old daughter since my wife ran off to Florida overnight January 14th. I have spent thousands and thousands of dollars and not so much had a temporary relief hearing. I have not spoken or seen my wife or daughter in the last 5 months, not so much as a picture of my baby since she was 3 months old. I finally got a temporary relief hearing for June 10th and the day before the hearing at the last hour her attorney files for a motion to continue. The judge although mad grants the MTC and sets a new hearing date 3 days later. Her lawyers complain and ask for mediation, etc, etc and the judge gets pissed. He denies every one of there stall tactics. Today at the hearing they ask for a new judge. Please God tell me what I can do to get my daughter back here? I had it won today at the hearing and they ask for a new judge and my wife and daughter head back to Florida. What are some dirty tricks my lawyer can play? We will never win if we don't start playing they're game. They will stall and stall to allow my wife to keep my daughter in Florida. I cannot go one more month without my baby girl. It's killing me! Her lawyer and mine had an agreement and they did a complete 180. My wife will do anything to keep me from seeing my baby. I can't take this anymore. Please God help.

[ocean]

Breathe....yes, lawyers play this game all the time. Try to keep busy and active, take time for yourself right now. Family court is crazy and very emotional, takes up to a year or more in most cases when the parties do not agree. Have lawyer push for a temporary custody and visitation plan while you are going through trial. If new judge is granted, they will get transcripts of what has been going on. Not going to change much and may not even be granted.

In the meantime, go to your local library , fire house, department of children's services and enroll in infant/child CPR class and parenting class. It will look good in court and help you understand how to deal with your ex.
To save money, you can hire and fire your lawyer just for court dates. Ask for pictures in writing to her lawyer, ask for facetime (video) of child.

It is going to be a long fight so be prepared, go to counseling for you if needed. It is very stressful.
Good luck!

[jcolt]

I had it won and they asked for a different judge. This was just a temporary relief hearing. I haveno even seen a picture of my daughter in 5 months. The law says my daughter has to stay in the state as there is a custody case. She has already returned to Florida. I can't mentally go without her anymore. It is evil. I even had a lady from dcfs in court to testify that I needed weekly visits with my daughter. Our attorneys had an agreement and they pulled this dirty trick. You say have lawyer ask for temporary custody plan. That's what I'm saying. She lives in Florida. I just want my daughter back here in illinois. This is her home state. Yesterday was the first day I've even been able to get my wife in court. I don't talk to her. My lawyer got a new court date for Wednesday but now her attorneys are asking for mediation. Not because they want mediation but because they know they can stall it out even longer. They knew that yesterday the judge would order her to remain in the state. They are stalling to keep me from seeing my child and from her having to return to illinois. I need advice on how to stop them from stalling any longer. You say take time for myself. I want to see my baby. I'm so sick of hearing "relax", "take time for yourself". It's driving me free king crazy. This is evil!

[ocean]

You need to relax because family court is very very slow...You will not go to trial this week. Is your wife and child in your state for court? On Wed, have your lawyer say we waiting too long and they do not speak, mediation is out, we need a temp order. It really is up to your lawyer to be firm and the mood of the judge that day. If child is in your state for court, see if judge will order a visit wed night at a public place (library? where mom can be in same building but you can see child, make it strict agreement that mom will stay on other side and not interfere with visit, or even a visit away, father will have child tonight from xx time to xx time, meeting place will be in court parking lot (police station?) They are video taped places. Ask for 2 hours....

Each side is usually given at least 1-2 times to postpone with no questions asked, then many times it will be pushed off as the lawyer is out of town, or held up in with a different court case. It takes time. I know you do not want to hear that but you need to be in control of your emotions to show the courts she can not get to you. If you can not handle it , many people go to counseling or little medication while going through court. It is rough...We used to have one night a week to deal with court paperwork, getting things ready....we have a separate email for ex to deal with her when we want and not just come to our phones when she is in her moods. We check it, once a week.

Once you get a court order does not mean it is over. Our ex refused to follow it, police do not do anything for domestic orders, write it up, and tell you go to family court. This is a very long battle....one at a time. First one, get child back to this state, if not then set up a very good, detailed plan with her paying transportation costs since she moved. That does not mean she will meet you at the meeting place, or put buy plane, bus, train tickets....

There is no magical way to get an order the day you are in court, if and I mean IF you are allowed to even talk on Wed, you can say "judge, i just want to be an involved father, to this date I have not seen a picture. I would ask that I be granted a 2 hour visit tonight and that she be ordered to have child returned to xx state as this is the home state. I want to co-parent with ex but she will not speak to me and last week went back on the verbal agreement between the lawyers. Please allow me to see my daughter."

At the same time, this is what your lawyer should be doing with the other lawyer and the judge when they meet without you.
Good luck on Wed!

[jcolt]

Ocean I am sure my wife headed back to Florida right after leaving court. Since the set up they're next MTC by asking for mediation on friday. Wednesday as a court date is almost laughable. I'm positive they are certain they will get a continuence. I do appreciate your advice. I will hope and pray that Wednesday takes place but I know her attorneys are being paid to delay. They are professionals at delaying. They will use every trick in the book to get her more time in Florida. Because there is a custody case now here in Illinois it is the law that my baby stay in this jurisdiction but I do not know how to get it enforced.

[ocean]

It is not the law the the baby stay in IL, the law is that COURT will be in IL and not in Fla. IL court will decide how to proceed and control custody/visitation and child support. What her lawyer does is their business, make sure you go on Wed and you may get a return child judgement. Is Wed with same judge or new judge?