Spouse wants to take daughter

[Lostinfl]

I apologize if this has been asked but my time is somewhat limited for answers.  So here it goes in short. This morning I found out my wife planned on leaving with our daughter after I had left for work, basically sneaking her out while I was gone.  I felt something was up and when I asked if she would be home when I got off she said no.  At this point I told her she could leave but without our child.  She called the sheriff to try and force the issue and was told that she could leave but could not take our daughter.  She loaded up her stuff and left, now she still wants me to let her take our daughter for a few days, she staying at a friends I don't know.  I have an appt with an attorney Monday.  My question is what can I do to protect my daughter from being taken?  My fear is I won't get her back.  I've told my wife she is free to come back while we process the paperwork or just visit if she wants.  But I don't trust her to just handover my daughter.  Any advice out there?  Thanks in advance.

[ocean]

For this weekend, she can visit at the home with you there. How old is child? What time is your appointment with lawyer on Monday? You could go to family court first thing Monday morning (be there an hour before they open) and file emergency temp custody of daughter as the mother left the home and threatened to take child (see police report). You should see a judge that day. Mom may try to do the same thing and be on line. Ask around and see if you can find out exactly which office in family court to file petitions and be there early. Then go to you lawyer appt. If mother files before you on Monday, she may be granted temp custody then it is a long battle. The age of child comes into play here to and the fact mom does not have a place to stay.

PS- you should not leave daughter with anyone else this weekend. Take off of work , do what you have to do. If mom finds her in care of other family or babysitter, she may be able to take child. Do not talk to mom on phone, use text only for this weekend and do not have long conversations. Less the better until you get something in writing from the courts.

[Lostinfl]

Thanks for the response.  Daughter is 3, and yeah I'm not letting her out of my sight.  Last night got a txt saying that if I won't let her take her she will just move back in, but we are still moving, which was planned before all this happened.  There will be no residence in my current location it will go back to our old address where I still own the house.  As I'm typing this she actually showed up with her friend, says they're all staying here.  nightmare.

[ocean]

Take child with you to court on Monday, do not let mom "babysit". Stay a little while but then go out for rest of day...(go to park, beach, whatever...take pics of having fun). Is her name on other house? If not, after you get temp order, you can go live there and she can not just move in with you (ask lawyer)...going to be a long 48 hours but make sure she does not leave with her.

[Lostinfl]

Gonna be a very long 48 hours, and very hard to do the court/lawyer thing.  just like me she's gonna keep her eye on savanna, thinks I'm gonna run off.  Don't see anyway to get that much alone time, I'd have to take her with me.   One thing is for sure, she's not leaving this property with that baby.

[Lostinfl]

Why do people act like this?  They totally lose site of what's important, the child.  Now I don't know what to do, she came back, didn't move back in all her stuff is still gone, she's naturally not gonna let our daughter out of her site.  Just being spiteful, like I'm gonna run off somewhere.  I live here she's the one that bailed.  Anyway I don't see anyway of getting to the lawyer now.  Can't leave my daughter she'd be gone, and unless I take my wife to my appointment I'm screwed.  Plus to top it all off my mom starts chemo next week for breast cancer.   Dealing with a very selfish person here.   

[ocean]

Just tell her you have appt and bringing daughter with you, you will be back in 2 hours (start the process hour before you have to be at lawyer in case she starts in). You can call your local police first and say you want to leave to go to appt but not leaving daughter because look what happened few days ago and if she calls on me ...here is my cell and what is going on.
What time is appt? Another option is to do a phone conference if you have a spot in the house you can call lawyer without her interference. If your appt is later, you can go to family court right when they open and file emergency temp custody as mother is threatening to take child and will not leave the house. Do you think she would run with child? You can go file without child right in morning and come home with custody papers if judge can fit you in, usually same day by me.
Can call lawyer at opening and ask what you can do since she is there threatening to take child and you can not leave....
Good luck!

[Lostinfl]

Thanks I'll call the lawyer first thing.  What are the chances I get the custody order if I go to the courthouse?  One thing in unsure of is we live in one county now, next week we move to another.  If I go to the courthouse here will I have to continue coming here or will it transfer?   My appt with lawyer is at 2pm and is 3 hours away. 

[ocean]

Emergency orders are given that day usually....make sure yo just file for custody that take months.
Call lawyer and ask what to do but really you file where you are now and then would take the case until the end usually. You can file for custody in the county you are on in now through family court and not file divorce until you get to new county and have them use the final papers from family court in your divorce papers.
Make sure the lawyer understands that this needs be done tomorrow or tues...you may want to call a lawyer in your county closer to you that deals with these courts.

[MixedBag]

Heck -- I was thinking -- take Mom with you and let her sit in the lobby of the attorney's office while you speak with your attorney and child on your lap.

That way MOM will know you're serious as can be....