where do i legally begin

[4charlie]

i cant afford a lawyer period... so i need help on where to begin the process ie: how and what to file!!! is it a petition? a motion? the laws here simply state that both mothers and fathers have equal custody rights. i already pay child support thru a court order but it doesnt specify anything about custody! but when i ask to take my daughter her mother says no!!
pls help

[itsalluphillfromhere]

that is usually handled as part of the divorce judgment.  Are you divorced yet?

[tigger]

What state are you in?  What do you want?  (specifically, 50/50 custody? Joint legal with visitation/parenting time, full custody?)  Did the mom move out or you?  How long ago?  How far apart? What's the age of the child? Is there (real or false) an accusation of domestic violence?

Generally: You would petition the court for whichever custody/parenting plan you want.  You can do a search for examples.  If you give us specifics, we can try to be more helpful.

[ocean]

If you were never married, go to the same family court that gave you  the child support order and ask to fill out a custody/visitation plan petition. (Some courts have that online so you can fill it out and hand it back). Some intake court offices will have someone type up the papers for you. You will need any orders you already have through the courts and what you you want "father requests joint custody and a parenting plan to be put into place by the courts. Father requests a temporary order be put in place so he starts seeing child while the courts make a final parenting plan. Father requests to have child XYZ until a perm schedule can be arranged. Mother has refused father regular visits and he would like to be involved in his daughter's life. There us already a child support order in place under docket xxxxx through XX county court. "

Then the courts will give you your first court date , usually within a few weeks. You will go and tell judge what your proposed schedule is (remember holidays, vacations, summers, birthdays, fathers day, halloween). Look online for many different proposals. You can give ex this paper before hand and try to agree on something. On that first court date, ask for a temporary schedule to be put in place while you go through courts. You may be in court every month for the next year hashing this out so be prepared for that. You can ask the judge to morning or afternoon hearings so you can work around the trial dates. It usually is never done in one day unless both parties agree. If  you want to look good in court, take a CPR class through your fire department or library. Sometimes the library or social service with offer parenting classes too.

How old is child? If child is very young, remember this is the schedule until 18 years old so get everything in there, what happens when child goes to school? School vacations? Drop off place , pick up place, exact times, who drives child (can be each drive one way, person wanting child picks up so no one can screw with dropping off late). Some people meet half way or at a public place.

Remain calm in court and just say I am here to see our daughter that is it. It is in the best interest of her to have both parents involved in her life.
Good luck!

[tigger]

Some places will require mediation and coparenting classes. Wake County NC is one of those places.

[OneMan]

i cant afford a lawyer period... so i need help on where to begin the process ie: how and what to file!!! is it a petition? a motion? the laws here simply state that both mothers and fathers have equal custody rights. i already pay child support thru a court order but it doesnt specify anything about custody! but when i ask to take my daughter her mother says no!!
pls help

One suggestion based on very long experience: learn and read everything on the subject. Become an expert. Start wherever you want. Then act resolutely in your own and your child's interest. Don't wait. The longer the other parent has the child to themselves, the easier to argue that primary custody has to be with that parent. Unless you or the mother are total screw ups, the child needs both parents in her or his life the most time possible. Only my opinion but quantity=quality.