Child Care - again - need VA specific info please

[gemini3]

we are trying to resolve a child care issue.  Ex is leaving the children (8 & 11 years old) in the care of a 15 year old for 8-13 hours per day, 4 days a week.  We think that this is too much responsibility for a 15 year old.

I haven't been able to find anything for our state regarding child care - just that it should be "appropriate".  Very subjective...

does anyone have any helpful information?

[greatdad]

Babysitting Laws


When it comes to babysitting laws, the regulations vary from state to state, so it's always best to check the specific babysitting laws in the area where you live. However, although most states don't regulate the minimum age that a child is old enough to care for other children, some municipalities have adopted guidelines. For instance, in Dakota County, Minnesota, the guidelines state that it's acceptable for children who are 11 to 14 to babysit other children as long as the parents will be returning the same day. In Prince William Country, Virginia, children who are between the ages of 12-13 may babysit a child for up to four hours.

[gemini3]

So we went to counseling with an agreement drawn up saying that the kids would be in after-school care, licensed daycare facility, or with a certified nanny if parents were unavailable to care for them, and she refused to sign it.  She also refused to agree to get any other child care other than the 15 year old for this week and next, and stated that once school starts the youngest will stay with her neighbor and the 11 year old will stay home alone until she gets home (3-4 hours).  The counselor wasn't much help - just lectured her on responsible parenting, and said that 11 years old was too young to be home alone, and that the courts here typically draw the line at 14 years.

So, the kids went back to their mom's on Sunday.  The oldest had been running a fever since Thursday.  My husband took her to the doctor on Thursday and he said to keep an eye on her and bring her back if it didn't resolve in a couple of days.  It didn't resolve.  She continued to run the fever, and their mom still left her home with a 15 year old to care for her for more than 12 hours.  Yesterday my husband went to pick them up for his Wednesday visitation, and their mom had them out at Chuck E Cheese.  The oldest was hot to the touch, so he brought her home and she was running a 102 fever.  He called his ex and told her that she needed to take her to the doctor, not Chuck E Cheese, she at first refused and said that he should take a day off of work and take her.  He said that he would, and then she agreed to take her.  She took her to the doctor this morning - diagnosis: PNEUMONIA!

So she's been leaving her 11 year old child under the supervision of a 15 year old for extended periods of time, refused to follow up on medical advise, and the child has pneumonia.  Unbelievable.

Is there anything he can do?

[Kitty C.]

Does the 11 y.o. know what circumstances would require her to either call you or 911?  Make sure she knows.  Also, if at ANY time while she's alone you feel she might be in danger, or she calls you and says she's scared (regardless of the reason), call law enforcement and ask for a welfare check.  They will check on her and will take her out of there if the situation warrants it.

Call the counselor and tell her about the diagnosis and BM's lack of concern.  If he/she still acts nonchalant, ask to talk to someone higher up.

Did the BM take her to the same MD that your DH did?  If so, contact that doctor and ask about their perception of the situation.  If 'neglect' is mentioned or alluded to by the MD, remind them they are required by law to report such to the authorities.  Bottom line, you need to get an objective 3rd party to recognize the situation and report the BM for neglect.  Law enforcement, the counselor, and the MD fit that bill.

What's the status in court?  Are you scheduled any time soon?  If so, get documentation from the doctor on this and make sure the judge knows that, in your opinion, the counselor didn't seem to be concerned about the babysitting issue, even tho the 11 y.o. is left alone frequently.  And if a welfare check has been done at any time, make sure you have a report of that to provide to the court, as well.