VENT!!

[Stepmom0418]

This was my DH's weekend to have SS. We had a great time! We went to the State Fair on Saturday, all day. And on Sunday we went swimming most of the day. It was a great weekend!

Then on Sunday PBFH starts calling and demanding that DH bring SS to her home at the end of visitation.

CO says DH is to pick SS up on at BM's home Friday night at 8pm. On Sunday BM is to pick SS up at DH home at 8pm. This was agreed to and signed by the judge in April of this year.

Last Tuesday she recived Dh's certified letter with return reciept that outlined the visitation plan. (we found the letter on this site, the intent to excersize visitation letter) Plus last week she also recieved a letter from her attorney that DH attorney sent to her attorney and it told her that we were following the Temp order and that DH is going to court for physical custody of SS.

(we have had alot of problems getting BM to follow the co. She has denied visitation including fathers day of all days,plus many weekends and holidays, tried to change pick up drop off, tried to change the times, shortened visitation, and false accusations made in court that have been proven false.)

Bm has her mother call and say that if we dont meet them in town "X" that they will call the police. This was on the voicemail. There were several voicemails that we saved even BM demanding we bring SS all the way to her house.

BM showed up at our home at 10:40pm last night to pick up SS. She had several family members with her. When she knocked on the door she about pounded it down, mind you there are a total of 5 children sleeping inside the house including SS. We got SS up and told him that BM was here. We walked him out (he was awful tired) and Bm started saying, " Oh baby whats the matter?" She said this about 4 times and he kept telling her that he was tired. Dh got a little upset that she seemed to be insenuating that we would harm SS in anyway! He came out and told her that he just woke him up and he was tired. He gave SS a hug and kiss and love you and told SS that we would see him in 2 weeks.

She then told us that our directions suck that we gave her to our house. We gave her the same directions we have given anyone else and noone else has ever complained!

This woman doesnt get the point that she cant change the co at her whim! We are in the midst of a custody case for many reasons all leading to the best interest of SS, and still she dont want to follow the court order! We just dont understand it!

Anybody ever deal with anything like this? Anyone got any advice? Anything would help at this point. We are now expecting some new false accusations, we just arent sure what they will be and how far the courts are gonna let her go with this!

Oh ya and BM didnt bring any police with her when she arrived to pick up SS. But she has stated many times that she fears DH and claims he is a violent criminal. (she has nothing to back up her claim to that so we beat it in court. She tried to get supervised visitation and it didnt work.)

[joni]

continue to stand your ground and do NOT deviate from the court order that is in place.  let her implode.  ignore her threats and immature outbursts and take the higher road always...for SS.  what goes around, comes around.  it may not happen today...but it will happen.

[Stepmom0418]

Thank you for your response. We do take the high road although it is very hard to do! But we know SS doesnt need to have any more conflict in his life than he already has. You are right what comes around goes around and sooner or later it will come back on her and she will get hers in the end.

[onedaddy]

We are going through the same thing.  
BM has two contempt orders in NJ and one pending in NY.  She denies visitation regularly, phone contact, etc.for years.  Her family tells the children 7 and 5 they cannot hug or kiss their daddy and they certainly are not allowed to tell him they love him forget about me.  The stepfather is a violent ex-con who has over 26 arrests mostly for domestic violence and even patronizing prostitues near the home the children live in.  He has no rights to his 2 children by 2 different woman according to the state of florida.  He regularly threatens DH in front of the children and his threats get increasing more violent.  BM has learned to file flase harrassment charges against DH land him in jail 2x after never being arrested in his life.  We recently won in criminal court against the allegations, but spending 8 hours in a maximum security prison is horrifing to say the least.  
We are embroiled in a custody battle, too that has cost us tens of thousand of dollars and much $ in lost wages.
We changed the pick-up and drop-off to the local police stations, yes it's bad for the children but it's worse to see their father threatened my Stepfather and BM or worse, if this seems to harsh for you, you should at least try a public place.
I implore you to document EVERYTHING.  By a small tape recorder and do not let a conversation or encounter go untaped EVER, that will be the one you will need.  Save all correspondences and good luck

[Forthelittleones]

Your case could be ours.  Our final hearing is on Sept 13th for a week.

We have parenting time before then but last time she said no, since we refused to not follow the court order.  DH wanted his 56 hours and mom was supposed to pick him up.

she said noon and you bring him here. We said No, we will follow the court order.  She said nope he isn't going.  So we will see. BUT you made me remember that I ned to let our attorney know that she wanted to file kidnapping charges against us as well as her mother for not returning him when she wanted us to.

DOCUMENT and keep the faith.

[Stepmom0418]

Well we do like the idea of meeting at a police station but due to SS being scared to death of the police at this time I dont believe that would work at this time. Although he seems to be doing alot better since we talked to him about what a police officers job is and we also talked about drugs and what they can do to people. (His grandma has been arrested recentally for drugs and she told him a whopper of a story about how the police abused her) As for a public place that is what we would like to see when we go back to court but right now we are going to follow the current co and there will be no deviations from it at all.

[Stepmom0418]

One thing our attorney has told us from the beginning is that we are to NEVER leave home without our CO in hand!! So it is in my purse and it goes everywhere we go even if SS is not with us.

At the present time DH attorney is working on a motion to set aside the mediation agreement. Mediation was a joke as BM didnt even show up and her attorney did. Her attorney managed to get her on the phone and we had mediation via the telephone. Since that day and even before she didnt want to follow the mediation agreement so now we want to procede to trial. It is just a matter of waiting on an answer from the judge and see if we can go to trial. (there are alot of other things that have came to light as well but that is our main arguement against the mediation agreement)

I wish you the best at trial and let me know how it goes!!