just wanted to know what you all thought.....

[raindropsla]

Hey, its been a while since I have posted here and just wanted to know what you all thought about our current arrangement with dh's ex. Recently we have all (us and ex and her hubby) have been calling a truce for the sake of the children. Last summer we had been going to mediation to try to come up with a plan for dh to have more time with children. After we all started getting along better we decided to handle things like adults.

     I still have one problem with what we all eventually worked out. We currently have one week on one week off during summer time. When school was about to start we all sat down and tried to come up with more time besides one night one week, one evening the next week and every other weekend. (this is what we had had in the past). She finally agreed to on our weekend we get them Wed. night thru sunday evening. But she wants and gets them on what is supposed to be our thurs. She brings them back here for 8pm. on the opposite week we only get wed evening. My question is. If this is pretty much a 10/4 situation out of 2 weeks why should she have to have what is supposed to be our thurs evening. Even the 11 yr old asked that same question. The youngest is still only 5 and I keep thinking that once bm realizes she is not her baby anymore she will allow more time. Also she is starting a new job that may require her to be at work on the wed evening's we have them so those may turn into overnights. and if she works on the thurs evening she is supposed to have them. then those may be given back to us as well. I was reading another post and I too don't like the fact that they have to be switched up so much. We take them to school on our thurs and fri. I am supposed to pick them up from school so at least they wouldn't have to get off bus at mom's on our days. but yesterday she called and said just pick them up here. I want to do 5 yr/old's home work with her before she goes.

     Should we just wait and see what happens or bring some of these concerns up with her and her hubby. I just don't think it is fair that dh still has to go wed evening till the next wed night without seeing girls then she gets our thurs for herself for an evening. Am I wrong?????

[MYSONSDAD]

Something does seem somewhat off.

Have you looked into a Parenting Plan? There are several here at Sparc. Use it as a starting point and customize it to your mutual agreement.

Might save a few more headaches down the road...

"Children learn what they live"