update

[mattwolf]

mwolfsr

I just wanted to update whats going on w/daughter & name change.
I decided to let her know that w/she turned 18 or married she could change her name if she wanted to.

She let me know that since I shut her out of my life I had no reason to want to her to keep same name.  

The truth is that it was her Mom that has shut me out, not the other way around.  I want my daughter to know this but am concerned that trying to push the issue, will only make it seem like I am trying to "bash" her Mom.

I am living in MD, but as soon as I have some minor surgery done this month, I am going to relocate to NC, as soon as I can.

One of my biggest fears has been to once again, go through a huge "battle" with BM, both for my daughter ad my own sanity.
It seems very obvious to me now that there is no other way.

My daughter also let me know that this is all "her" idea and that BM had nothing to with it.  I want so bad to tell her that her BM has been "putting" her up to this for the past 7 years, maybe not by what BM says or does, but by what she is NOT saying or doing..

Anyhow, thanks for letting me vent.  Any input would be great.  And thanks again to those whole shared w/me earlier.
Peace
Matt

[MYSONSDAD]

Everyone here has probably gone thru this in some form and at some degree.

The best thing you could probably do right now is keep a good communication. Phone her, send her cards and letters, let her know you love and are thinking about her. It might be sometime before she realizes the truth, but keeping her in the forefront, will someday come to light. She will learn on her own.

When my son grows up [25 years or more] and is fully mature and can handle the truth, I will show him how hard I fought to stay in his life. I will show him the good things and how much love that will always be there. It will be unbias, just facts. He can make up his own mind. No intentions of coming forth until he asks. Everything is put away and in a safe place. I do not want him to find it on his own.  

No slamming, no prejudice, I am sure the ex will do enough for both of us.


"Children learn what they live"