Help with WA Law/Standards re: custody and visitation

[Dslayer]

This site looks to be a godsend--Any advice to get me started in the right direction is greatly appreciated.

My questions are:

1) Is there an age in WA at which children have a right to determine which parent they want to live with.

2) 8 years ago when my daughter was 5, standard visitation in the summer was 2 weeks-she is obviously 13 now....Has that standard been changed?  I've heard 6 weeks is now the standard.

Thanks in advance.  

[4honor]

On whether your Judge is constipated that morning or not.

There is no age your child can choose, but IF you have something in court that judge MAY look at the relative maturity of your child and ask her what she wants.

Your teenager can vote with her words or vote with her feet. If she keeps leaving the CP's home and coming to yours then she is voting with her feet. I suggest you do not encourage her to do so, as there are all kinds of sleezy people out there between your home and the CP's. (On the other hand, as an aunt to teenagers, I might consider providing safe transportation for my Nephew to go to his father's home.)

Six weeks is pretty standard for that age, BUT it will create a major modification in the parenting plan, as it is more than 24 days difference in the parenting schedule. So, you must prove a "significant change in the circumstances" of the child or the CP to meet that threshhold.

If nothing has really changed, I suggest you go for the most additional time you can get under a minor modification, and then redo in 12-24 months to add more time. It will be less costly and likely to succeed.

[Dslayer]

Thanks-I appreciate the reply.

I was afraid that your response as to 'age' was going to be what it is-a friend of mine was able to choose which parent he wanted to live with when he was 13-also a WA resident, but that was 22 years ago in his case.  I find it amazing that children, even as they mature, have so few rights.

As you advise, I have suggested to my daughter never to 'vote with her feet,' but she has already made plans with several of her friends and at least in two cases, with their parents to have a safe place to go to bail out-both are relatively close by and then she's supposed to immediately get in touch with me-I asked her to do that after she told me about her plan.  This is not a classically abusive situation in terms of physical abuse although her BM has struck her with objects at least two times, but her BM is an extremely manipulative person and in my estimation, emotionally abusive. That my daughter has not fallen victim to her devices is testimony to her own strong will and the particular efforts of her stepmother, my wife, myself and our family as a whole.  The problem is that while what is going on here is extremely obvious to the three of us and my immediate familly, it would not necessarily seem to be so to a judge.  My daughter is doing extemely well in school, is marvelously mature and well adjusted, but has reached the point that she's willing to do about whatever it takes to live with us.  But it sounds to me that short of going to war in court-there is little that I can do-and even then there is little hope.

I'm going to seek legal advice here locally as well.

Thanks again.

[4honor]

and if she has done so on more than one occassion I would have a motion in front of the judge ASAP.

[wendl]

Depends on the county and what commissioner you go before. If your case is in Pierce County I can tell you what commissioner NOT to go before in Snohomish County I can tell you a good commissioner.

A lot depends on how you come across to the commissioner and what kind of mood the commissioner is in (in my opinion)

I don't think there is a set age, I know some commissioners will listen to the kids wishes at 12.

I am soooo glad to be out of WA now.

Let me know what county your case is in.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[gipsy]

My cousin just went through the same thing and consulted a couple atty's , It is My understanding By His reported information that if his daughter really  wanted to live with him she could , But What he discoverd was that his daughter was playing the mother and him , and he told her that she could if she really wanted  , And it seemed to turn out that the daughter was saying things to get out of restriction from what ever parents house she was in trouble at ,