What do I need to do now

[fhl]

I recently moved back to my home state. I have custody of my kids. Kids have been in counseling for some time now. When I got back here I called ex who has supervised visitations. I had not imputed child support on her because I figured she could save up money to send for the kids for her visitation which is to be supervised in the home of her parents. She never did. In the year I was gone she called the kids maybe 6 times, sent them each one letter.

Now that I'm back I called her and told her I was here. I told her that I needed to set up counseling for the kids here and that I really felt we both needed a mediator or something because we can't seem to talk without fighting. She agreed with that. She also agreed that she could wait to see the kids until they got into counseling. Their counselor from the other state sent a letter to my attorney outlining the type of counseling the kids got and her suggestions. One important part of that was that my daughter has post traumatic stress because of repeated enema's that her mother and grandmother would give her. The counselor was concerned about that. She also said that our daughter had a type of disaccociative...she never talks about her mother. Even during play thereapy the counselor says that she talks about me, her grandmother, her aunt..but never her mother. And she removes anything having to do with toilets from the playhouse. She says ther'e not needed.

Anyway. 5 days after ex and I talked she filed a contempt charge because I wouldn't let her see the kids. I am waiting for my attorney to get the modification papers filed.. Am I in big trouble??

 

[MYSONSDAD]

Did she have a visitation she missed? Was it court ordered?

What was contempt for?

From here on out, inform her either by return signature certified mail, or have your attorney draw up a letter. Inform her you will now be taping all conversations with her to protect yourself.

After what she did to your daughter, I would have a real problem with this. She has supervised, but then the grandmother also took part with the enemas.

Am I reading this correctly? The SV is in the grandmothers home? While you have the attorney on the phone, see about getting the visits in a safer environment.

Personally, I would fear for your daughters safety.

"Children learn what they live"

[fhl]

Yes she has not seen the children yet. She should have had two visitations that have been missed since I have been back. My attorney is filing a modification with the courts asking for supervised visits in the grandparents home only after we get into counseling. My attorney has been slow to move on this so it has been around a month since I have been back and the ex hasen't had visitation. But she had agreed to this. She agreed to wait until the kids got into counseling and she agreed that visitation would be contingent upon her going to counseling as well. I have all our conversations on tape. I admit I might be upset at the lenth of time as well but I have been trying to push my attorney to get with it. I wanted initially to have the supervision changed altogether to be either by me or at a visitation center. After discussing this with the ex is when she agreed to the counseling business. My attorney seems to think that if we are all in counseling, the ex would be foolish to do anything to harm the kids but I don't know.  When I was in another state, she had out of state visitation rights.. She could have had the kids at Christmas and spring break. She did not do so. She didn't call to tell me she wasn't taking them. When I had asked her why she didn't she told me she couldn't afford it. I explained to her that this is why I did not impute support on her...so she could afford it.. She had no responce.

[MYSONSDAD]

Maybe this is why the attorney is not too upset over her contempts. If she never took her time before, why the concern now? Is taping admissable in court? Some States do not allow taping unless both parties agree.

Hope you have documented all of her, by choice, missed visits. Most parents would beg, borrow or steal to see their children. Where there is a will, there is a way.

Hope you all get to counseling soon. And I pray your daughter gets thru it with flying colors.



"Children learn what they live"