out of state visitation over holidays

[crayiii]

My wife and I are working on our visitation schedule for our 6 year old boy.

Travel will be by airplane so we are both trying to maximize the visits.  

We are trying to figure out how to do the Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years schedule.  It's not just the Holiday's themselves but it is also our son's school break.

Can someone share there winter schedule with me?  

[Ref]

DH gets every other holiday (Thanksgiving break, July 4th, MLK Jr etc) Just look at your kid's school schedule and make su all the holidays are covered and specifically mentioned in your agreement. Xmas is split so DH gets first half on even and second half on odd. This works to alternate New Year's too.

DH also has any weekend visitation with 5 days notice because we live so far apart. DH has all summer but 1 week at the beginning and 2 weeks at the end.

Make sure your agreement states the holidays that you have also include the weekends attached. DH's doesn't and it is a huge pain in the ba!!s.

[crayiii]

We've looked at the every other Thanksgiving and Christmas but that means that every other year I wouldn't see him at all in November.  I'm trying to get it where I don't go a whole month without seeing him.

Since we're splitting the airfare for the visits we both need to be able to afford it.

[MixedBag]

We have 3 long distance divorces.....and three solutions....

I suggest that you alternate the holidays -- and include spring break/Easter.

Write into your agreement that the child can depart their home location starting at say the time school dismisses or maybe 5 pm and returns by 9 pm on the day before school resumes.

Then alternate between odd and even years....

Spell out WHO pays for airline tickets and WHO gets to decide which flight the child will actually take.

Work to get it all half and half...at the very least.

[Kimberly9]

Dh is the NCP to a 10 year old boy who lives in another state about 4 hours drive.  We are kind of different, because we don't rotate.

Fall Break -- (2 days and a weekend) BM gets every year.

Thanksgiving -- Dh gets the entire break every year

Christmas /  New Years  -- Dh gets from the end of school until Dec 23 and from Dec 30 until the day before school resumes.

Spring Break -- Dh gets the entire break every year

Easter Break -- The entire school holiday rotates years.

[Kimberly9]

as NCP we really wanted the long holiday -- time-wise -- of Thanksgiving weekend.  We were willing to give up every Christmas and Christmas Eve to get that.  It is not as bad as it sounds.  We have our own traditions that take place on December 27 and New years.

The CP was willing to give up Thanksgiving and just celebrates the weekend before.   New Years wasn't a biggie for her.

My suggestion for your situation.

NCP gets the entire Thanksgiving break every year.

CP gets from when school dismisses until Dec 26th every year.

NCP gets from Dec 26th until the day before school resumes every year.

This makes the visits longer and worth the airfare.

[wendl]

With thanksgiving I would suggest Everyother since it is not that long, or request you get the child the day after Thanksgiving thru the weekend. That way you will still be able to have a Thanksgiving with the child, we do not alway have to celebrate on the Day of the Holiday.

As for xmas, most of the time in WA state they have 2 weeks off at xmas, maybe one year you get the 1st have of break (which would be you get both xmas eve and xmas and then mom gets the 2nd half, and alternate each year.

Also remember in WA the kids usually get a mid winter break as well

Here in my new state my son only gets 1 week off at xmas and NO mid winter breaks.

Go to your childs school website and download the calender so you know the dates of all the school vacations.


**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[awakenlynn]

DH has his DD every spring break,
every other Thanksgiving(rotating with every other Christmas Break),
and every summer(minus 1 week after and 1 week before-but for only 8weeks).

We will be going back to court soon to get weekend visitation for everytime BM and DD are in the area.

[flewwellin]

We get every other beginning with the wednesday before thanksgiving and ending the day before school begins, every christmas from the 26th until 2pm the day before they go back to school (for us jan 3rd), every spring or easter break whichever is longer until day before school begins again and 5wks in the summer consecutive or separate at father's discretion but has to let their mom know by May 1st. My step kids are ages 4 & 6.  Hope this helps some, also this was set by the judge.  Their mom wasn't willing to allow so much time with their father.  

[joni]

My SD is in Rochester NY, we're in Chicago.  The plane commute is 1.5 hours.  Since she was 6 (she's now turning 8), we get her the 2nd & 4th weekends of the month from Friday after school to Sunday night.  We alternate holidays, including school breaks, split Xmas break and Summer in 1/2.

Most long distance would state to alternate the holiday, split Xmas in 1/2 and the NCP gets the entire summer vacation except for 2 weeks.

Regarding XMas break, which is only 10 total days, it's split in 1/2.  The first half is alternated every to include Christmas for a parent every other year.