Good news and bad news

[DMcD]

Bad news is that DH's atty has spoken to PBFH's atty. They have decicided to use the child support review hearing to also address the psychiatric issues. SD won't have her assessment with the children's center tomorrow because she won't even agree to that. I have rescheduled it for March 22. So, what this means is that she will have to go without treatment until after DH gets home and that's ONLY if the court allows the assessment and recommended treatments. Although it has since come to my attention from SD's therapist that she has a condition called dysthymia. It is a depressive disorder indicated by a low grade depression lasting TWO OR MORE YEARS. Um, PBFH had been ordered to get SD therapy for 3 1/2 years before we got her. So, basically, we can prove that not only is some of her depression not caused by her relocation here, but also that - proof positive - BM was negligent in her mental/emotional health treatment of SD. Unfortunately, we can't do anything to have her officially diagnosed with dysthymia (only an M.D. can do that, the therapist can only indicate that SD meets certain criterion in the DSM).

YSS will also have to go without antidepressants until this happens. PBFH wants a "second opinion" and told DH that she will send up YSS's Kaiser card. PBFH has provided NOTHING to us in the last 7 months so I doubt that she will send a medical card. Of course, getting a second opinion will not be possible if we don't have her insurance info. Pretty sneaky, wouldn't you say? YSS has had three opinions already: 1. therapist 2. psychologist 3. psychiatrist. If she wants another psychiatrist's opionion, she is welcome to get it, but I'm almost certain that they will say EXACTLY the same thing that the other THREE mental health professionals said. I'm not pushing the issue, his counselor is. If she hadn't advised me to have him assessed by a medical professional, I wouldn't have taken him, nor considered antidepressants for a child as young as he is. It gets frustrating. The kids will live through this and so will I. PBFH is probably just digging herself a much deeper hole when it comes time for the review mediation and hearing. She will probably have much of her decision making rights taken away based on her refusal to follow medical advice and her inability to work with me and DH in ensuring the children get appropriate medical treatment.

Now for the good news. I called CSE yesterday and they have FINALLY modified DH's wage assignment. They had stopped charging him ongoing support in September but had left the wage assignment in place for the full amount and they were applying the whole thing to his arrears. Well, while that was happening, PBFH hadn't sent up one red cent for the kids. She made her first court-ordered child support payment late last month and she should start having her wages garnished sometime this month. Next month, she will probably be expecting a $345 arrears payment from DH. I bet she'll be PO'd when she gets her new child support amount. Poor baby is only going to get $59.67 a month from now on!!! Woo-hoo!! That made my day. With the increase in DH's take-home pay and the additional child support coming in to the household, our buget has over $600 per month more than it did while DH paid support and PBFH paid nothing. I am breathing a huge sigh of relief. We were about to have our utilities shut off and our home loan defaulted on. Now I can get everything caught up again.

Oh, and PBFH was ordered to provide her W-2 to DH through her atty. W-2's are required, by law, to be sent to employees so that they are received on or before January 31st. It's been nearly two weeks. I know she's lying about her income. I don't think we're going to get a W-2 by the time the review hearing comes up. I wonder what the court will do if that happens. Figure she has something to hide and use the amount we suspect she makes until she can prove otherwise or just shrus their shoulders and keep the amount the same. Contempt? Compel her to provide? Authorize a subpoena? Anyone's guess right now.

I'll keep everyone updated on the medical issues and if we get a child support victory next month.

[Peanutsdad]

Good goin D!!

Good luck and keep us posted...........pictures in mind,, pbfh seeing the WAY off amount of check.. aint it bliss?

[kiddosmom]

sounds great D!!

one bit of advise, do not hold your breath for the cs checks. be happy if you get one, but don't count on it. our pb still has yet to send even a penny!

[nosonew]

I know it's hard to sit back and wait, but not that you are cp, can't you get the medical cards yourself?  

And I agree on the cs issue, however, with garnishment, until she quits her job, you should get a good chunk!  That's great!

[DMcD]

DH's atty has already gotten and served the wage assignment. She owns a home and has worked at her job for about 6 years now. If she quits, she will lose her house and have to move back in with her mom. Frankly, I don't care what happens. She can pay and we can give her kids nice things or she can quit and lose everything she has worked for and the kids will go without some of the finer things in life. It really doesn't matter to me. I don't want to screw her, but I do hope that she does the right thing for the sake of her kids.

As far as the medical cards, she has Kaiser. She is in So. Ca and we are in No. Ca. I guess they have different billing systems. The kids have So. Ca policy numbers and BM will have to call Kaiser and ask them to issue No. Ca numbers to use her insurance. It doesn't matter that DH is CP, they need her to call. We just use the military insurance. There aren't any co-pays or deductibles and they cover almost everything. It's really up to BM. Again, I don't care either way as far as the medical insurance. She can get the new policy numbers and we can get a second opinion or she can use it as a stall tactic - for now. We are going to ask for specific orders in March. If she provides a No. Ca Kaiser number in 10 days from the hearing, we will get a second opinion. If she doesn't, we use the three existing diagnosis's and the medication recommendation. Same for SD. I see no problem with getting the assessment ordered for her. If BM doesn't provide a Kaiser number by the date of the assessment, we go with the children's center diagnosis and medication recommendations, if any. We will have that court ordered and she can either do it or not. I don't think that there is really anything we can do at this point but litigate until someone decides that she's not competent to make decisions in the kids' best interests.