I'm gonna post here and hopefully I'll get some responses.

[lucky]

I need to know the overall type of city, etc. that Laredo, TX is.  In particular the economic/job climate for an 18 yo with a high school diploma and the only job experience over 1 month is working at Subway.

Here's why:  OSD is planning on moving to Laredo in a couple of weeks with her boyfriend of less than a month (met him after I kicked her out).  She's been fired from her job, she's sicker than a dog, she's pregnant (with someone other than her boyfriend's baby -- she doesn't know we know), and this man has been abusive and controlling already -- he already screens her phone calls.  To the best of our knowledge, he doesn't work, but always has a lot of cash.  I doubt he's independently wealthy.

The boyfriend is from Laredo, and some siblings live in Laredo, but we have no idea what his last name even is or what part of Laredo they live in.

[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]

[ksmomof2girls]

here are some website addresses I found from going to google.com and typing in Laredo,TX in the search area.

//www.ci.laredo.tx.us/

//www.visitlaredo.com/

There are others but you can find them on your own.

Sorry to hear about your OSD.  I hope that she will eventually get her life straightened out and I hope that its sooner than later (like 2-3 yrs after the baby is born)

Just let her know that no matter what you will be there for her. ( even if you don't like the person, or what she has done, she still needs to know that she loved despite her decisions.)

[patton]

I've been to Laredo several times.  It's your typical BORDER town is far as I'm concerned.  Other's may have a different opinion.  Not exactly the cleanest town in the US either.

There's several colleges there, regular and technical.

Some pretty good eating places, nice motels.

But it's got all that Border traffic, which invariably has drug issues.

Since the independently "wealthy" boyfriend is moving there, possibly closer to the drug supplier?

I had friend that worked there at Texas A&I for several years.  They were ready to move. LOL

[lucky]

That's what I'm afraid of, Patton.  She says they'll make a lot of money working down there, but when asked "doing what?" she said "I don't know, we'll get jobs."

[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]

[backwardsbike]

Lordy, you must be so worried.  It is difficult once they become an "adult".  My mom always used to say, " Its not how many candles are on yur birthday cke it's what you've got upstairs that counts."

Let her know you love her.  Let her know you'll always be there for her.  What a difficult situation.

I am a nurse and I've worked for 20+ years in Drug and Alcohol treatment.  I cannot tell you how many nice youg people I have seen come into treatment because they got mixed up in situations as you describe.  Unfortnately you just cannot talk sense to some youg adults.  At 18 they know all the answers.  Its not til about 40 when they finally know the questions.

I will keep you all in my prayers and send many good wishes your way and your daughter's.

[lucky]

Her boyfriend was pulled over last Sat. for drunk driving and was in jail -- got out today.  She was in the car and got a minor consumption but they just ticketed her.

Here's the part that makes it not matter...

Yesterday she got nailed with a group of people (just happened to be the boyfriend's friends)....  She's charged with possession and intent to sell -- they had 25 POUNDS of marijuana and she's acting like she had NO idea where or why these "friends" were going to that place where they got busted.

We can't bail her out, her boyfriend -- maybe, maybe not, he's not sure he WANTS to because he told her to stay away from those friends if he wasn't around because "there are things you don't understand about them or know about".

So, in spite of everything we tried to do, she's done ruined her life.

[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]

[Forthelittleones]

I am so sorry for your pain!  If you want to talk, let me know.

Your in my prayers..

[lucky]

Thanks.  

Actually, I feel pretty good about it considering.  Probably because I'm so pissed off at her.

Turns out that SHE wired $500 to Laredo Tuesday morning THEN went with the others to pick up the package that had been UPS'd to one of the other person's parent's home (she loves her folks, don't she?).

She's trying to tell everyone that she didn't know what was going on and that she wired the money because "someone" called her and told her to, and no, she didn't think it strange or question why SHE would be asked to wire $500 to Laredo.

She knows what was going on, I think she figured "quick cash, it's just one time and I won't get caught".  UPS turned the package in, I don't know how the wire was discovered.

She got lucky, she got out on her own recognizance (sp?) while one other person paid $5,000 to get out and the rest of them are still sitting because they couldn't make bail.  She goes back to court for arraignment on March 8th.

Today she asked her mom if it was true that if she got put on probation she wouldn't be able to move out of state (to Laredo, TX!).  When her mom said yes, that was true, osd then said that she wasn't even going to go to court because NO ONE was going to tell her that she couldn't move out of MN.  Apparently the concept of "don't show for court, go directly to jail" hasn't crossed her mind.  Her mom told me that she was dressed like a street walker today too.  Wonder why?

Oh, well, she's an adult, we did what we could and I don't have time for court hearings and jail visitations and I don't have money for collect calls from jail/prison.  It's not that I don't care, but I have to detach myself for my sake, dh's sake and the other kids' sakes.  I'm either overinvolved or detached in osd's issues and overinvolved is bad for my health and stress level.  Plus I can't help her with this one, at all.

[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]

[wendl]

Lucky,

Sorry to hear all this, but if she is an adult and still thinks it is no big deal, maybe it is better she go to jail for a time.  Sounds like she doesn't understand by doing this she is helping contribute to the drug use of our minor children and it is way bigger than her.

She needs to be held accountable for her actions.

I personally wouldn't want her around my other kids.  You have done what you can, you have other children to focus on, as you will still love her even for all her mistakes, you cannot afford to loose sight on your other kids that need you.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**