What to do, or how to do it....

[lucky]

Well, after several years of hard work and defending her beliefs to many members of her family(including her godmother, mother and older brother), ysd will be confirmed on May 1st.

Dh and I decided (fortunately for us, it falls on our weekend or she'd be at her mother's, and she doesn't even attend church, much less understand how important this is to ysd) that after the service, we would make reservations at a local restaurant for their Sunday brunch.  I called around today and we've decided on the restaurant, but we are NOT paying for anyone other than our immediate family.

In addition, her mother's family HATES OUR GUTS and one of the sisters is ysd's godmother.  Her mother and family were raised Catholic, we are Lutheran.  The Confirmation rites are quite a bit different but the godmother thinks (according to what ysd's mom said) that SHE'S going to play a role in the confirmation.  However, the Confirmation Rite at our church is all about the kids and basically has NOTHING  to do with the parents or godparents except as them being part of the congregation that day.  I'm hoping that her mom addresses this with the godmother prior to the service because I can see a problem as she is now looking forward to being in the spotlight and playing good little godmother (even though she is one of those that ysd had to defend her beliefs and faith to).

Anyway, I digress.  There is a large potential that mom's family will deliberately NOT R.S.V.P. to me and thus I will not make a large enough reservation -- they'll think they are thwarting dh and I.  OR, they'll make their own reservations and attempt to force ysd to run all over the restaurant during brunch because they will NOT come to our tables to visit with her.  Either scenario is not good.

I'm trying to figure out how to address that potential -- or even if I should address it -- in the little invitation insert (also the cost needs to be addressed, I don't want everyone to think we're footing the bill).  Here's what I've come up with so far.  Feel free to chop it up, rewrite, etc.  It's unfortunate that we have to do this, but the experience we had with them at osd's graduation party last May makes me want to prevent as much as possible.  One reason for the brunch instead of getting together at our home -- which is 2 blocks from church instead of all the way across town like the restaurant.

[em]"A brunch at the Green Mill in City will follow the Divine Service.  
(The cost for brunch is approximately $11 per adult.)

Please R.S.V.P. to 999-999-9999 no later than April 20th.

Note:  If you plan to join ysd for brunch, reservations should be made as a group to ensure everyone will be seated in the same area as ysd.  Reservations not made with her group may not be seated near ysd."[/em]



[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]

[dsm]

Ah, the joys of raising a child with strong beliefs - and God forbid they go against the other house, huh?   Hurray for YSD!!!!!  That is just so very cool for her and how very good of her to be able to stand firm in the foundation you and DH have provided for her!  That is huge!!!  :)

Okay, for the invitation.....here's what I would do.

The brunch is a *wonderful* idea - YSD is going to feel very special and how true indeed that it is about HER day - no one else's; and no one else should be in the 'spotlight'.  Do you have a pretty good feel for the number of people that will attend?  If you make say 15 reservations, will the restaurant hold you to pay for all 15 spots?  If not, reserve 5 more than you end up with for a count (unless h*ll freezes over and godmother and mother actually RSVP to you!).  Definitely make it clear to the restaurant that you are paying for X number of people and the rest are to be separate checks.

Here's what I would do with wording:


Please join us at the Green Mill in City for brunch following the Divine Service.  Cost is approximately $11 per adult.  

RSVP is appreciated by 4/20/05 to 999-999-9999 in order to provide an accurate count for brunch to ensure everyone is seated in same area



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dsm - 34
DH - 38
SD - 15
LO - 9
BB - 22 months
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2 Cheap Entertainment cats - Snoop & Dagger - 5 years and counting.....

[lucky]

Thanks DSM, I like that!

[em]Lucky

Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
- Will Rogers[em]