Settling arrears in a lump sum

[COFJ55]

Hello-
I have not been on this site for almost 18 months now and I won't go into extreme detail about my case but I have a pretty simple question.

Here are the basics:
I found out that I unknowingly fathered a child 12 years ago during a VERY brief relationship.  There are multiple states involved because neither the mother nor I are in the same state.  The court in my jurisdiction, in the interest of her state, awarded arrears of $11,000 and current support of $500 each month.  The judge thought the whole case was bullsh#t, as did the state appointed attorney, but went with "minimum" award for the mother.  

Instantly, I had to get a second job (now working 70 hours each week) in order to keep my family from having to suffer, and $500 + $100 (arrears) was garnished from my paycheck.  During the refinance of our home, obviously in an effort to cut mortgage payment and make this easier, we found out that there is a lien against the home for the arrears so we can not refinance.

I want to offer the mother a lump sum cash settlement of $5500 to settle the arrears and remove the lien.  The $5500 is money that I will get if I sell my car and is the maximum I can pay her.

Is there a form letter that I can find in order to get the legal mumbo jumbo correct to make this happen?  And secondly, should I address this matter with the mother, my state's CPS officer or her state's CPS office?

Thanks for any help in this matter.

[kiddosmom]

Not sure if you can pay only part of the arrears.
You are in a sucky position as alot of fathers are finding themselves in these days.
Mothers decide they do not want the father in theirs or their kids lifes, so they do not say anything to the father, then years later when the father is doing good, the mother hits him for automatic back arrears because the mother decides she wants the money, the father then has to suffer because of a choice made without his knowlege or input.

You might want to post this to scocrateaser, make sure you read the manditory posting guidlines.

[mandi]

Do either of you have a lawyer???  If so, I would inform your lawyer about this settlement and have him bring it to the attention of her lawyer.  And see what comes out of it.  If you do not have a lawyer, I would maybe send her a certified letter telling her of this settlement that you would like to do and wait for her reply.  If she replies and agrees to it, then i would have legal papers drawn up with this new arrangement.  It will not hurt to try, my hubby owed $6,300 in arrears and that was only because BM's lawyer brought up that he had only paid her $200.00 a month fromt he time the child was born until she was 2, which they both agreed that was fine.  Anways, she ended up settleing for $3,200.  My point is, to give it a try and see what comes of it.  Who knows maybe she will settle for it, I would.  But i am not a mother or a lawyer, so I could be wrong, but htis is only my opinion.
*~Mandi~*