I need help fast!!!! Please!

[IceMountain]

First, I'm in Illinois, she is in Iowa.

My ex and I came to a verbal agreement concerning transportation.  Since we live 200 miles apart and our decree does not address transportation, we agreed on meeting points, etc.  I put the agreement in writing for which she refused to sign.  I then sent the letter to her certified mail with return receipt.

Our decree states have my son EOW from 5 to 5.

Today, I get a letter from her that was sent overnight delivery.  She states that the agreement was just a 'temporary compromise' and not permanent.  

She stated in her letter that I can now pick up my son at 5:00 on Friday and return him on 5:00 on Sunday.  She will do no driving.  In return she will do all the driving during my 6 weeks visitation.  

She also refuses to do any driving for holiday visitation, which is usually 9-6 on the day of the holiday.

If I drive to pick him up what happens if I don't return him?  I'm crossing the state line.  The courts and CSRU both know my address and have been informed of such.  Since transportation is not addressed, does she have anything to hold me in contempt for?

I have my son this weekend.  I cannot be at her house at 5:00 because I don't get off work until 2:30 and it's a 3 1/2 hour drive.  Can she deny my visitation if I am late?

I already plan to take a witness with me.  What else can I do???  I need help and I need it fast!!!!

[socrateaser]

Please post the exact text of your custody orders. I can't comment on the reasonablness of either of your positions until I read the order.

[IceMountain]

Custody of Minor Child:
Custody of the parties' minor child, to-wit, ******* born *******, shall be and remain jointly in the parties as provided by law.  The primary physical residency of ******** shall be placed with the Respondent, **************** subject to the following visitation schedule:

a. **** shall have visitation with the children alternating weekends from 5:00 PM to Friday until 5:00 PM Sunday commencing withthe second weekend following entry of the decree within;

b. Six weeks summer visitation.  **** shall provide notice of his intention to exercise summer visitation not less than four weeks prior to the actual exercise of said visitation.  ************* shall receive alternating weekend visitation during ****'s summer visitation.  Said weekend visitation shall be from 5:00 PM Friday until 5:00 PM Sunday, commencing with the second week of ****'s summer visitation.

c.  During each even-numbered year, **** will have visitation with the minor child on Easter Sunday, July 4th and Thanksgiving Day from 9:00 AM to 6:00 PM, and from noon on December 23 until 9:00 PM December 24; during each odd-numbered y ear, the same are reserved for *************;

d.  During each odd-numbered year, **** will have visitation with the minor child on New Year's Day, Memorial Day and Labor Day from 9:00 AM to 6:00 PM and from 9:00 PM on December 24 until 5:00 PM on December 25; during each even-numbered year, these dates are reserved for ***********;

e.  **** will be entitled to have the child every Father's Day and ************ wil lbe entitled to have the children every Mother's Day, irrespective of the visitation schedule set forth above;

f.  **** shall, in any event, have reasonable access to visit the minor child on his birthdays, and on his own birthday, by telephone, or other wise, as the parties may agree;

g.  Such other times as the parties shall mutually agree.

This is the exact wording of the section of our decree involving custody and visitation.  You probably didn't need all of that, but I didn't want to take a chance of missing info and taking up more of your time:)

IceMountain

[socrateaser]

The order doesn't give much of a clue. You need to obtain a clarification order on the transport issues, because the order is so vague that even if the custodial parent unreasonably uses the distance and transportation issues to restrict your access to the child, you can't get a contempt order, because there's nothing in the order that you could use as an element of the contempt.

In short, there isn't anything that you can enforce concerning transportation. So you had better get a judge to decide, because otherwise your ex will just keep you dancing on a string.

[IceMountain]

Thanks for the information!

I met with my lawyer today and he confirmed the same thing.  He is drawing up the papers to get this thing modified.  

Thanks again!