TO FLORIDADAD

[antonin]

One more thought on the rec. to wait until daughter gets in first grade.
The EVs reason may be that (I assume you work in day, wife does not?)
that mother can be with her more than you. When first grade starts, the time playing field is more equal. daughter will get out of school at 330 or so...you get home at 5 or 6, etc. Understand?

So....if that is the case and find out from the EV if it is, get that put in the stip as the reason for the wait.

[floridadad630]

I'm not sure I understand.  What did you mean by "One more thought on the rec. to wait until daughter gets in first grade."

Mother works late and gets home between 6:30pm and 7:00pm.  Its a final order at this point.   What did you mean by "reason for the wait".

Thanks for your thoughts

[antonin]

I mean the evalutor's reason for waiting to begin 50/50 until your child starts first grade may be that he thinks that you will not be able to spend as much time now with your daughter as your wife can.  In other words, the evaluator thinks you would have to leave your child in Daycare and your wife would not. (Maybe he assumes your wife does not work). The evaluator may also be assuming that when your child begins first grade she will be in school until 3:30 each day. When that occurs, then the time that you and your ex spend with the child will be more equal.

Another reason for the evalauator's recommendation to delay implementation of 50/50 may be the fact that you have had your child for a lesser time share than your ex. The evaluator's plan might be designed to ease your daughter gradually into the 50/50 arrangement.
I am not saying whether this is right or wrong: I am trying to figure out the evaluator's resoning for his decision about the 50/50 delay.

Does that make it clearer? At any rate, you should find out what the reason for the 50/50 delay is.

Sorry for the initial muddled reply.

[floridadad630]

No that wasn't the case at all.  I argued for 6 out of 14 days (Thursday and Friday of each week), Evaluator recommended 5 out every 14.  Judge gave me 3 out of 14.  With the exception of Fathers day and one day for Christmas every two years, I got no holidays.  Only 1 week in the summer.  Wife works full time, and I had taken 7 months of work to care for the child during 1st year.  The judge gave me no reasons in his order as to why I got so little time.

[antonin]

Good God! I can't believe this. I know this will be of no consolation, but I have to tell you that of all the posters who decribe their strategies and preparations, I thought yours to be the best and the most solid. So much so that one day you listed what your preparation was and I cut and pasted it into my "strategies" file as a great example of how to prepare. There is no doubt in my mind that you are being screwed by this system just to keep your visitation down to maximize child support.
No doubt whatsoever.

[floridadad630]

Thanks anyway.  The last year put about 3 years on me.  The court ruling was devestating.  If my child didn't beg me so much, I'd let it go.  Its been almost a year and 1/2 and she still cries and begs me almost every time its time to go back to her mom.  The thing I learned most about the whole process is that don't let your lawyer turn your case into a catfight with your ex.  Focus on the facts between you and your child, and on the evaluator.  A catfight will accomplish nothing but demonstrate animosity and the important things will lose their significance.