A Tragic Development

[Peanutsdad]

would a group of singledads have gotten a private space at singlemomz?

Probably not,,,,but look at the name. It was a site set up by single mothers for single mothers.  As such, I didnt even expect to be welcomed there, but I was. Regardless of popular opinion, ( or unpopular LOL), there are many many women there that either really need help with their situations or have help to offer.

Are some of them antidad? Sure,, no arguement there.  Even the members there that ARE antidad,, treated me with respect.  As a single dad with custody, in essense, I was an outsider,, but I did develop many good friendships there.


Sparc,, is probably the best site out here for parents. ( Note, I said parents,, not dads, not moms). It is the site I primarily "inhabit". Sparc has the most detailed resources for parents of anywhere on the net.
Waylon is, as far as Im concerned, a true saint. He has tried and does encompass all aspects of being a single parent with this site.

[jurroppi1]

I was looking in search engines to see if I could find them anywhere else on the web, and I cam across some statistics for the site:
[A HREF=http://www.alexa.com/data/details/traffic_details?&range=2y&size=medium&compare_sites=&url=www.singlemomz.com/#top]Related info for: singlemomz.com (from ALEXA)[/A]

Kind of interesting anyhow.

[skye]

Almost everyone here knows my story as a stepparent. The abuse of my stepchildren the harrassment from the PBFH I have been at this sight well over 4 years now... I have learned a great deal from this sight and consider a lot of you dear friends... but keep in mind there are 2 sides to every story ... I was a single mom before I was a stepparent ... here is my story..

I married very young 17 actually. At the time I really don't know what I was thinking. oh well ...he was great the first year, then he started finding fault with all my friends, when they were gone, he started on my family, then I got pregnant.. how dare me.

That was the worst year of my life, he beat me every day throughout my pregnancy, I am not talking little hits or slaps I am talking to the point I prayed to god to let me die. just be done with it....

EVERYONE said why are you staying.. yet I had nowhere to go or so I thought... than it was to the point that I believed in my heart I could never or would never find better... then one day six months pregnant and with toxemia I had the nerve to fall asleep on the couch with a dirty spoon in the sink... when he came in he was livid and drunk so he boiled a pot of water and threw it on me to wake me up. he chased me up the stairs beat me wrapped a guitar cord around my neck and threw me out of a 3 story window... and the cord broke.


My daughter was born that night, she weighed in at 1 and a half pounds. she had a collapsed lung from the fall, she was medivac'd to a bigger hospital and I was placed in intensive care for 3 weeks, I saw my daughter for the first time when she was 4 weeks old... I was scared I would not recognize her as I had never seen her so I broke down....

the day they released her I waited till he went to work and I jumped on a bus for texas ( I actually just picked a spot on the map) I remember praying that night ... GOD you have kept me here for a reason, my daughter is here for a reason, I am putting this in your hands please god just let us be ok... and yes we are now...

It took about 3 years to like who I am , to not try to figure out what I did wrong,
I lost all my teeth in the last beatiing from the fall... to be 20 and have no teeth is really difficult, and even now I have dentures but they dont fit right because I did not have them when It first happened... I feel angry alot...

Angry that it took that much for me to get the nerve to walk away...
angry that he got very little punishment...
angry that he has all his teeth, that he has no scars from me...
angry because he has served his time and has the visitation most good people have to fight for...

I have been to sinlgeMomz both as a single mom and a stepperson and I was always welcomed they may not have liked what I said sometimes BUT they never lashed out at me for my beliefs... there are a lot of women there who I can relate to almost understand their anger because I have been there too... and there are those who hate all men simply because they are ... there are men here who feel the same about women.. but they/we all have a right to what we feel

[MYSONSDAD]

My mother posted there and was VERBALLY attacked. God forbid she was asking questions to help her son.

After going there from time to time, I found about 75% of those mothers where doing nothing more then passing on information to stick it to Daddy.

'SPERM DONORS'  'RUN MOMMY RUN'

I have been going there for about a year and was not at all impressed with their bias attitudes. Some do have some real issues, but given the advice they received, it also changed their outlook and gave them direction on how to play the game.

I remember about 6 months ago, RINI was trying to help many of them understand the new IRS laws going into effect, She got blasted. Rini spent much time and effort into helping them. That was her thanks.
 
How many here would respect this site if this is what is offered on the Homepage. NOT MANY. Sparc is, by far, the best resource for parents. BOTH PARENTS. There are many Moms on this site and I have a strong respect for many of them. Their constant encouragement and support speaks volumes. Their ADVICE is irreplaceable. Wonder why I got stuck with the ex I did.

Children need both parents. Until abuse, neglect or drugs are proven, both parents should be equally involved with their children.

DO I FEEL BAD ABOUT THOSE MOMS, HELL NO. They are part of the problem. Exchanging tactics for court, encouraging others to play the system. 90% of mothers already have custody, for the fathers, it will be a lifetime of uphill battles.

Most of their articles were based on articles here, changed, of course to suit their purpose.

The Moms that truly do want what is best for their children will find their way here. Get good advice on what is in the ''Best Interest of the Child".

And as far as being for the children, you bet your a$$ I am for the kids. I would bet the farm on it! Already sold my soul.

My Opinion: SINGLE-MINDED- MOMZ

'CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE'

[MYSONSDAD]

"Children learn what they live"

[gr8Dad]

BTW, hi, ain't posted here in a while...

From what I understand, as I was not here when it was, SPARC was initially titled as a site for fathers seeking custody.

Things change, people change.  I guess singlemomz followed the old, "lead, follow, or get out of the way..."

[sweetnsad]

Yes, everyone has an opinion.  And not alway, will everyone agree.  But, you have to remember that Singlemomz was a site by single mothers for single mothers.  Men have been welcomed there (as PD knows), but that's because they are open-minded enough to realize that some of these mothers are hurting, just like alot of dads.

SPARC is a resource site for both mothers and fathers.  Singlemomz was a retreat and refuge for single mothers.  You can't compare them.  

I believe that children need both parents.  It's the responsibility of both the mother and the father to raise their children, even if they are no longer together.  But, as always, there are circumstances where that isn't an option.  Abuse, drugs and neglect would factor into this.  And, alot of CP mothers AND fathers deal with this on a daily basis.  Hence, our backed up court systems.

You have to honestly sit back and ask yourself why some women are, as PD says, anti-dad.  Probably for the same reasons that some men are anti-mom.  Is it because they want to be?  No.  Some of these mothers are having a heck of a time trying to raise these children on their own.  

Of course there are situations out there where the mother is doing her very best to keep the children from their father, whether it be out of spite or jealousy or because of money, but for every one of those, you will find 10 more that want to do the right thing for their children.  

And I applaud them for doing their very best.

[Brent]

>Brent, I was in no way smackin on you in this thread,, I
>simply was answering other posters with my own observations.

I didn't take it that way; we all have different experiences and opinions and there's plenty of room for all of them. I'm actually glad to see that some people found assistance at singlemomz.


>You do a damn good job helping parents.

I just hang out here; you guys do all the heavy lifting.  :)

[joni]

something I have noticed on this board is the disproportionate number of custodial momz posting on our expert boards....soc....dr. d.....dr. reena.  I use to cruise the singlemomz board and noticed on many occasions a poster recommending that the singlemomz use SPARC for the experts or for the resource archive.

[MYSONSDAD]

I am not referring to ALL Mothers. I am not anti-Mom. I have a wonderful, very supportive Mom.

The issue at hand is the Single-Momz board.

As per previous post:

"There are many Moms on this site and I have a strong respect for many of them. Their constant encouragement and support speaks volumes. Their ADVICE is irreplaceable."

"The Moms that truly do want what is best for their children will find their way here. Get good advice on what is in the ''Best Interest of the Child".



"Children learn what they live"