Legal Question!!

[miamifreak]

Hello Socrateaser, here is my situation.  I am 31 and just relocated to Rhode Island from Florida where my STBX resides with my 3 children. My childred are ages 7, 5 & 4.  I pay 765.00 per month in child support. I make 500.00 per week before taxes. I seperated from my wife in January of 2003.  Lived in Ft.Lauderdale, FL until April of 2004 and relocated to Rhode Island for employment.  Out of the blue........

I was served with an Injunction for Protection Against Domestic Violence with children on July 27th and was scheduled to attend a hearing on August 10th. I attended the hearing and the Protection order was continued to another Judge in Broward County Florida on August 30th.    

The hearing was a joke as it lasted maybe 5 minutes and I was not given a chance to defend myself against these false allegations. I have been in Rhode Island since April of this year and we had never in the 9 years that were were/are married had an issue of domestic violence.


I did ask the judge to allow me to see my children and she agreed to give me 1 hour of supervised visitation which was humiliating but very rewarding none the less since I had not seen my kids since April.  The injunction says I cannot have any contact with my wife or my children.

Here is my question: Her lawyer just faxed to me a Stipulated Agreement for Extension and Modification of Injunction.   In this stipulation, I am allowed telephonic communication only with the minor children on a daily basis. The minor children are to contact the husband daily at a provided number between the hours of 3:00 p.m. and 5:00 p.m.  Her lawyer asked me to sign this agreement, have it notorized and fed-ex'd next day to her on Monday, Aug. 23rd.......In signing this, am I admitting guilt or wrong doing?  

I cannot afford to hire an attorney to represent myself and her parents have hired hers and have the financial resources to do so.  I feel alone on an island and that I am about to lose the only things that matter to me, my children. I havent been able to speak to them in months and I want to sign this so badly just to speak to them but am affraid that by doing so I am putting myself in serious jeopardy.  Please help me.

[socrateaser]

>Here is my question: Her lawyer just faxed to me a Stipulated
>Agreement for Extension and Modification of Injunction.   In
>this stipulation, I am allowed telephonic communication only
>with the minor children on a daily basis. The minor children
>are to contact the husband daily at a provided number between
>the hours of 3:00 p.m. and 5:00 p.m.  Her lawyer asked me to
>sign this agreement, have it notorized and fed-ex'd next day
>to her on Monday, Aug. 23rd.......In signing this, am I
>admitting guilt or wrong doing?

You're not admitting anything except that you don't have much interest in seeing your kids, which is gonna come back and bite you right where the sun don't shine.

>
>I cannot afford to hire an attorney to represent myself and
>her parents have hired hers and have the financial resources
>to do so.  I feel alone on an island and that I am about to
>lose the only things that matter to me, my children. I havent
>been able to speak to them in months and I want to sign this
>so badly just to speak to them but am affraid that by doing so
>I am putting myself in serious jeopardy.  

OK, here's the help. HIRE AN ATTORNEY, because you are too emotional, and you can't defend yourself. You need to take a polygraph and offer it into court as evidence of your truthfulness, to defeat this allegations. If you do, and you are telling the truth about your ex's allegations of abuse being perjured testimony, then you will suddenly have a HUGE edge.

If you sign the stipulated order, then, I'll state it directly, you are a moron or a whimp. Beg, borrow, and do what you have to to, but get the money for a lawyer, because you are very close to having your life ruined more than it already is.

[miamifreak]

Thanks for the quick response to my question Socrateaser! Much appreciated.  I figured your answer would be similar to what it was and I am no moron or wimp and I plan on following your advise and hiring an attorney as quickly as possible.  As far as the polygraph,  can I offer to take one before the court and ask that the court pay for such test and the loser of said test pays for both? I know I am not lying and have no problem in doing this, just not sure if court will go for such request.

[socrateaser]

>Thanks for the quick response to my question Socrateaser!
>Much appreciated.  I figured your answer would be similar to
>what it was and I am no moron or wimp and I plan on following
>your advise and hiring an attorney as quickly as possible.  As
>far as the polygraph,  can I offer to take one before the
>court and ask that the court pay for such test and the loser
>of said test pays for both?

The court won't pay, so forget that idea. You can offer to take a polygraph -- that by itself will make the court distrust your opponent's allegations, unless she agrees to do similarly. And, you can certainly ask the court to order to pay for your test in the event that it comes back showing you truthful.

[DecentDad]

Hi,

I'm not a lawyer but want to echo Soc's advice (from a layperson dad).

I faced false accusation for DV that resulted in my arrest, and prosecutor ended up dropping charages against me for lack of evidence, a plethora of character witness declarations about me, and a psychiatrist's declaration stating that two months prior to my arrest I had reported to him that my ex had assaulted me.

Three years later and a month before custody trial, I faced a potentially serious accusation of locking up my daughter in her room during my custodial periods.  Biomom had recorded herself having a conversation with our four-year-old daughter describing that I lock her up, never let her out, etc.  The recording was sent to a number of people in my case.

My attorney likewise told me to immediately take a polygraph.  It cost me $400, and it was with a former Secret Service examiner.  The results were immediately faxed to opposing counsel, our custody evaluator, and the child's therapist (who had reportedly heard the recording).

So, 48 hours after the recording was distributed, my polygraph results made their rounds.

For $400, it served to neutralize the allegation before it exploded.  Opposing counsel never brought it up again.  The custody evaluator concluded in his report that the conversation was the child engaged in pure imagination.

Also, as long as I was taking the polygraph, I had the examiner ask me other issues.  So, the polygraph results didn't just deal with defending me against that other accusation but also dealt some blows back at my ex in terms of other things that had happened between us.

Also echoing Soc's advice... right now, you're standing at the lip of a cliff, given your situation.  If you represent yourself, it's like pretending there's an invisible bridge over that cliff.  You won't know until you're already falling to the bottom that you made a huge error, and nothing will save you at that point.  An attorney will-- at worst-- give you a safety line at the edge of the cliff, and --at best-- may be able to pull you far away from the cliff.

Best wishes for you and your kids,
DD