To go or not 2

[dipper]

Soc,

Thank you for your reply to my earlier post.  Regarding the issue of a consent form for the counselor, I spoke with counselor today and the child's mother had filled out the consent form and appears 'very eager' to assist the counselor in any way.  

My hubby and his ex share joint legal custody with her having primary custodial in Virginia.

As for violations of the court order that my hubby is thinking of taking his ex to court over, here is a brief listing:

* refusing to pay consensual counseling for son
* Ignoring requests for medical information (including address to med. provider)
* not informing hubby of IEP meetings, changes in child's class situation
* not informing hubby of interim reports
* being very dictatorial over all visitations - which are not specified weekends in the order
* signing child up for basketball tryouts without hubby even knowing - and its on his time as she decided to keep child the one weekend he could come on time
* actually, only sending one group of requested information regarding school - and that was before school started (calendars, etc.)

They went to court in June as son wanted to stay with hubby when his mother moved 2 hours away.  Hubby was unaware at that time that he was not being informed of school meetings and unaware that he could obtain notices directly.  (He actually believed that because court instructed her to keep him informed that she would do it.)  Hubby could not afford lawyer - her lawyer was extremely aggressive.  Her failure to keep him informed of any concerns of their son were used against hubby.  Order for son to live with her is temp.....go back to court in January.  Hubby has went to school and carried a letter requesting all information and filled out appropriate papers.  

Would it be in hubby's interest to bring attention that she is not keeping him informed of concerns of son and ignores his requests, overrules his simplest wishes - such as to take son to counseling on days that are supposed to be his time anyway?  (there is actually more if you pick apart every failure to inform - about six pages worth atleast)

Thank you again!

[socrateaser]

All of the incidents you list shoud be addressed and used in a custody hearing, but they are not going to add up to a contempt citation, EXCEPT for the issue on payment for healthcare costs. Assuming that your temporary order instructs both parents to share this cost, the failure to do so is contempt, and the court will force the other parent to pay.

Of course, your prior facts suggest that the amount of money owed is trivial, so, once again I wouldn't be bring a contempt charge, I would just enumerate all of these issues and question the mother about each at trial -- the intent, to show that the mother is systematically excluding the father from participating in the child's life.

If there is a GAL or an evaluator appointed, then just list all of the issues and express sadness at the other parent's apparent desire to exclude you from participating in raising the child.

If there is no evaluator or GAL appointed in the case, and the mother has an attorney and you don't, then you're gonna lose this war, and you probably won't ever know what happened.