Significant Change of Circumstances...?

[Luving StepMom]

My DH and I filed for a change of custody last summer (state is South Dakota).

We went through a home study and the evaluator praised DH (good role model, great parent) and said that BM is not a good role model, more of a parent than a friend, needs financial and emotional counseling, BUT the bottom line of her recomendation is that the child had not been damaged enough by the BM to recommend a custody change.

So last November DH and I moved to the same city where SS/BM live. BM has not made ANY changes, and actually things have gotten worse. We want to file again for a custody change because we believe the evaluation would be different now that SS would not have to change schools, etc and based upon the fact she has not made any of the evaluator's recommended changes.  

Our attorney says that moving to the same city is not enough for a significant change of circumstances.  

DH also now works out of the home, so he can pick up SS from school almost everyday (if he was allowed to).  

BM has also recently refused to give SS medicine that a Doctor prescribed. SS is 7 and still has "accidents" in his pants, so the Doctor told us to give him a stool softener daily. She has refused. Granted this is not life threatening, but it is an example of neglect in my opinion.

Where can we go from here? Are any of the above "significant" enough in your opinion?

Thanks...

[socrateaser]

"SS is 7 and still has "accidents" in his pants."

This is the only important issue. Seven seems unusually old for this behavior. I would not move for a custody eval, yet. I would have the child evaluated by a mental health expert, to determine if this behavior is being caused by either or both parents, and then if I received a conclusion that was extremely negative with regard to the other parent, then I would file the motion. Otherwise, I agree with your attorney.

[Kitty C.]

Something else to keep in mind.........this can also be a symptom of ADD/ADHD, because children with it can ignore signals their bodies tell them.  DS had the same problem, just for not as long.  I would also recommend he be seen by a specialist.  Recommending a stool softener, without finding out what the underlying cause is, is only treating the symptoms.  The cause still remains.