school back ground check

[delmaster]

Recently I email my child's teacher and express my desire to volunteer in the school. The school does not at this time have a structured volunteer program. The principal call me today and told me that I am not allowed to visit with my child at school except during her lunch break from 11:55 to 12:45 because I could disrupt her and her classmates. I understand this. I asked her if I would be notified of volunteer oportunities such as field trips and class parties. She said that she could notify me if, get this, I am willing to provided personal information to undergo a criminal background check, I asked the principal why and she said that it was school policy that at the discression of the princial that she can ask any person who is not a paid school system employee that has contact with children at the school or at a school function to complete a positive back ground check. I asked the principal if my child's mother has volunteers at the school or during school functions and was told that she had done so in the past and she presumed that her mother would do so in the future. I asked if my child's mother had be asked to undergo a criminal back ground check. The principal replied," I don't have any reason to believe that it is necessary". I asked her what reason she had to believe that it was necessary that I undergo a back ground check. Would you know that she replied to the effect that she had been informed that I have been convicted for drug trafficing and kidnapping. I asked her who informed her of such a thing and she said that she was not at liberty to discuss it further with me. But we all know who she got her "information" from. Btw, I recorded this call.

I told her that her information was wrong and that I would submit to a criminal back ground check only if the child's mother was required also. She told me again that she did not she the need to have the child's mother investigated.

Here is where it get really stickey. I have 50/50 joint legal and physical of my child. Mom is refusing to let me see child more that 2 days per month. As per CO I get 14 days plus 6 weeks summer, and alternating school holidays. I pay child support and have since ther moment of seperation from child's mother. I told the principal that the same legal right to visit my child at school, volunteer at school and be involved in my child's education. I have a legal right to pick-up my child from school, which has been refused in the past (of which there is a contempt charge pending against the school system) in which the CO specifically states that I have the right to pick-up child. But mom wrote on child's contact sheet that I was absolutely not allowed to pick her up presumably because I have kidnapped her in the past. Which is not true and I have never heard of this until today. I have a completely clean criminal record.

My question: Is this something I should presue with counsel? Does a school have the right to exclude that father on the word of the mother? Where the heck do these people get off?

BTW: I have a change of custody action pending since May siteing mother's consistent custodial interfearence. I don't expect to win. It would be nice. I am hoping to get a judge to force law enforcement to get involved in exchanges.

Any thoughts or advice appreciated!

Del

[wendl]

I know in my sons school if you Volunteer in the class or for  a field trip they require background checks.

As for the information provided in the school file regards to you no being allowed to pick up your child. TAKE your court order to the office and give them a copy, request to speak with the principal and discuss your concerns. COMPLETE an emergency contact list for you to be put in the childs file.

I know at my sons school, when I indicated that my sons father was not allowed to pick up our son without prior written consent from me, the school secretary told me the only way they legally could allow for my ex not to pick up my son from school is 1) ex has criminal background(kidnapping, abuse etc) and court orders stating this. So I had to give them the court orders showing my ex only has supervised visitation and why and then and only then did they put in my sons records that dad was not allowed to pick up child without written consent from mother.

I would talk to the super of the school.
:)
**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[delmaster]

I have no problem with the back ground check. I know it's clean I have never been convicted of anything except a speeding ticket 5 years ago. I do take exception to be singled out for a back ground check because the principal has been incorrectly "given" inforamtion that I am a convict. And that not all parents are required to submit to a back ground check. Basically, in my opinion, the mom has told the school that I am a bad, bad man and that's why the school is giving me so many problem. I talked to my lawyer today and she is going to request a meeting with the attorney for the school district. She said that she is going to file a motion for every single piece of paper in my child school record to see where the principal got this new "information". I guess now we moved from PASing the child to PASing the child's school. Nice.


About the pick-up. I have done what you have suggested. My attorney has written 3 letters to the school attorney and requested that I be allowed to pick-up my child. The only responce we got was that I could pick her up if I gave the school 48 hours notice and the mom agreed to it.

The CO was designed to allow me to pick-up from school so mom would be less likely to interfer with visits. I guess mom thought she couldn't get into trouble if she could blame it all on the school policies.

Thanks for your advice!

Del

[MixedBag]

You know, if that's the answer you got from the county board of education's attorney, I'd suggest going above their heads and write the STATE Board of Education and file a complaint with them.  

Go over their heads....

And actually, I'm trying to think how Soc put it once...  They're overstepping their authority when something is spelled out in a civil court order.

[nosonew]

So, you are taking her to court for contempt charges and possibly change of residence due to her interference?  Keep good records of everything the school says (like the tape-recording-smart thinking, especially if you are in a one-party state).  I would also call these people to the stand as witnesses FOR YOU, to clearly state WHO told them what, and what was said.  

If you have c.o. 50/50, how did it happen that you don't have your child more than 2 days a month?  How long has this been going on?  

[wendl]

I would definately have your attorney file a motion and complaint with the school and the school district regarding how they are treating you. That is just wrong.

I can understand if the CP has PROOF in a court order, basically this school is failing to abide by COURT ORDERS and should be penalized for their lack of respect for the courts.

JMO

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

[delmaster]

I agree. The school is over stepping it's bounds. We filed a contempt order on the school district for custodial interference 2 weeks ago. I think that just made the principal even more angry at me. She has only been principal for 1 month.

We had to deal with the same things last school year. At least the teacher will tell me how my girl is doing in her classes.

I will talk to my lawyer about contacting the state board of education.

[delmaster]

Yes, motion to show cause was filed against her in May. She has been able to put off court twice and we are just waiting for a date. Her lawyers is a real piece and told her that if we went to court int he middle of the school year then custody would be less likely to change. I'll give him credit, we'd would probably use the same tactic.

We plan on calling school teachers and administrators as witnesses.

I don't have my child for more than 2 days because mom doesn't want me to see my child. She screens calls, won't allow the child to call me back, tells the child that I do not love her because I *never* call and talk to her on the phone even though I call 3 or 4 times a week. She tells her that I don't want to see her while taking the child to one of her brothers homes when it is my turn for visitation.

She has turned the school against me and even tried to turn my own mother against me. Thank god my mother didn't fall into the trap. I've been recording phone calls for almost a year now. We are in a 1 party state. Georgia to be specific. I record every call that has to do with my child. Mom has staed on recording that She doesn't care what CO says, she will do what she wants when she wants and if I don't like it tough.

She has yelled at me. Told me I do not love my child because if I did I wouldn't be doing this to her mother. And on and on and on and on.

Mom currently has 32 pending contempt charges against her from the last 3 months. I didn't have an attorney before that. I saw child from May 25 to July 6 for summer visitation all the while mom had child beg me to take her home. I refused. Since July 6 I have seen the child on August 13,14, 15 for 51 hours. I am supposed to see child this weekend. I wrote a letter to mom stating my desired visitation schedule for September per CO. I encluded Labor day as visit because I have every other school holiday. Mom said I could not have monday and told me if I did not agree I would not get to see child.

 Mom has been interfering for most of the childs life. I have journal entries that show a very cunning pattern of PAS. I requested pshyc and parenting eval on all 3 of us during mediation. Mom refused and mediator agreed with me. Judge ordered evals. I've paid the evaluators and have done my part and mom keeps rescheduling her appointments.

The stupid thing is that ex wife's brother started all this. When he came tovisit me and child (whenI lived in another state for awhile) to visit child (he lived in a near by state) during summer visitation he mentioned that his other sister had talked about taking custody of my child because "M doesn't take care of C, my mom (child's grandmother) is doing most of the rearing." I responded that if custody were to ever change that I would be first in line and not allow my daughters aunt custody. Uncle told child's mother what I said and that I wanted custody of child. At that time I was not seaking custody. Mom flipped out and accused me of trying to take away *her* child and that is when all of the denied visitation, assusations and all around crappy time started.

Sometimes I just want to scream. But I know I can't. I just have to keep going and play the game. At this point I don't think it's a game that will ever end and even if it did no one is going to win. Least of all my sweet daughter.

[delmaster]

I agree. My attorney and I have already talked about this today. She is going to try to work it out with out filing anything else. Filing the first contemt seems to have made things even worse. If we can't get it worked out then we will definetly be filinf on the school.

I guess we'll have to wait and see if the court agrees also.

[gipsy]

The mom tried this crap on Me also . She took the new court order to the doctoer and the school and tried to preclude me from this , heres what My atty told me to do . I went to My son's orientation And stood up and told who I am etc , I acted intelliganly and asked questions concerning my son , My atty said I would get further With the school than I ever will with the mother and I do , Heres the deal , Ask the Principal and whoever else if they have a court order that precludes you from being a parent of the child , And when they say No . Pick up the child and tell them to you have a court order for your visitation and you are sorry that the mother told them these stories but you have a court order for your visits and that they will cooperate , You have joint custody . I don't even have joint custody , I would even gently tell the principal that she needs to contact an atty reguarding this issue , And provide her with the court order , The mother in My case  went around flashing this court order that said she had sole decision making etc at the school and doctors and that the school and doctor were not to cooperate with me at all or give me any information , fortunately I have a cool atty that kept it simple and told me to be really nice and just say the court order does not  take away any of my rights as a parent , it just gives her the ability to decide what school he goes to and what doctor , . So I told the school and the doctor , theres nothing in the order that  say's I can't have all this information etc , And they said well she said this and that . And I said well I can have My atty write you a letter they said no your right the order doesn't stop you from any thing .Just Be nice and get them to ask an atty , what the deal is you have all the rights as a parent . You just  let the mother push you around , Sorry to be blunt , But I have a really cool atty And he tells it like it is , He say's plainly if you would have stood up for your rights from the beginning than you wouldn't be where you aRE , Your reason for change of custody Probably won't work cause the judge will wonder why you just let her push you around and not file contempt , My atty explians it , " Parenting plans are not self enforcing "   " If she doesn't cooperate then you have to go ask the judge or commissioner to make her ,'' Ok The first few times the commissioner will do nothing ,  But if you keep filing contempt  3 -4-5 6- times if neccessary then the court is going to get it ,, My atty filed for My cousin ,for free , And he went to the court , Here's how it played out ,Mom talks crap and sends the child over top sisters , We go to sisters to get His daughter , Of course all these sick people have the child all freaked out , and she is crying and doesn't want to go . I had already told My cousin . About My expirience and he may have to DRAG the child away screaming, as I had My son because the mom would terrorise him before I got there , And if you pick up and drag the child away then the Sick moms will see there sick game doesn't work , And they will quit , , SO the transfer went poorly and the sick sister flipped us off as we drove away , And I had the viseo camera waiting and she saw me film her and put the nasty finger down and there is no further problems . Now about video taping , it will rarely be used for evidence except if there is an assault , But it is a great Behavior modifier , They will tell the truth to the court and there atty more often for fear of the tape being shown , trust Me grow BALLS file contempt , and video tape the pick up , there is nothing that has put the stop the BS In my Case and my cousins faster than Video taping .Heck Half the time The tape is screwed up and really shows nothing significant , But I gauruntee , It really makes every one stop the bullshit , Never has the mother been poisening My sons mind when I have the Magical camera , As a matter of fact she is Mary poppins at the transfer EVERY TIME  with the camera rolling , Its a miracle cure for this cancer ,Grow balls show up at the court order place and time with a witness and file contempt if the child isn't ready to go , If she say's child doesn't want to go thats like the usual crap and the judges here this all the time , And In wash state its the parent that is to have the child ready to go , File contempt . Call 20 attys tomarrow and get one that will file the papers for  a fee of like 90 $ My atty does it all the time , And then You do the footwork  Just bring a pen and paper and make sure every one gets the right copies and go pay a process server that serves her , fills the served papers and files them with the court ,This is not rocket science and there like  . Half the attys out there that will tell a big story about a contempt , and I have seen My atty at a contempt  hearing and heard him say this 20 times , Just go tell the commissioner that You need a little help getting the mom to cooperate wiht the parenting plan , then Mom has to say Blah blah , And then You say theres a parenting plan and she's not doing it , and then she will say Hes a psycho and the commissioner may not believe it , then If the commisioner does , then You say  , Depending on what court you are going to , that You want a Guardian ad litem , And get the paper at the law library and file it  Ask the commissioner if you can come back for them to sign it , trust me I have been through the ringer and the court just has this Process  postwhat state  and area you are from , So people from that area can give you feed back , and call the court and ask if they have Guardian ad Litems , or court investigators on Behalf of Minor children .I think Your main deal is to file contempt and stand up to the mother , Like whats the deal with the school did they attack you , What You do is go get your child if they attack you call the police , they have no athority that precludes the court order . If the police get called show them the order .