Can custodial mom exclude me from daughter's therapy?

[overit]

The CO reads, "The joint stipulation entered into by the parties provides that parental responsibility for the child should be shared pursuant to Section 61.13, Florida Statutes, which the court finds in the best interest of the child...Father and Mother shall have shared parental responsibility and shall retain full parental rights and responsibilities with respect to the child."

My daughter's custodial mother wants to find a counselor for my six-year old daughter.  When I asked to be involved in choosing the counselor and in the therapy itself, she told me that it was none of my business.

Can she legally exclude me from my daughter's therapy altogether? We're all in Florida.

[socrateaser]

>The CO reads, "The joint stipulation entered into by the
>parties provides that parental responsibility for the child
>should be shared pursuant to Section 61.13, Florida Statutes,
>which the court finds in the best interest of the
>child...Father and Mother shall have shared parental
>responsibility and shall retain full parental rights and
>responsibilities with respect to the child."
>
>My daughter's custodial mother wants to find a counselor for
>my six-year old daughter.  When I asked to be involved in
>choosing the counselor and in the therapy itself, she told me
>that it was none of my business.
>
>Can she legally exclude me from my daughter's therapy
>altogether? We're all in Florida.

She can obtain a therapist, and you can fire the therapist, and she can rehire, and you can refire, ad infinitum, as you both have joint rights and duties with respect to the child's health education and welfare.

The therapist has a separate duty to keep the child's records confidential, so once the therapist actually interviews the child, you won't be able to force disclosure of the info.

Your best course of action is to file a motion to clarify the existing orders and have the court expressly instruct the parties as to their respective rights in this area, so that there will be no misunderstandings.

[DecentDad]

Just for your consideration.

I had similar experiences with the mother wishing to exclude me.

Years ago, a judge ended up ordering... that parents shall inform each other of any educational, health, mental health, and dental appointments scheduled for the child.  Both parents shall be allowed to attend said appointments, regardless of who is exercising custody at time of appointment.  Parties shall act in a civil manner in front of health professionals and teachers.

That level of detail makes it pretty clear that both parents stay involved and informed about important appointments.

[ER]

DD--I am going through this right now in court with my ex. We have Shared Parenting but I am the residential parent.

Let me tell you that our plan was so vague that no one knew what rights each parent have. Top that with us having a child with special needs as well!!

Our problem became medical decision making. The plan allowed for both of us to have it but as Soc stated, she could hire, I could fire, I could hire and she could fire. It would never end. This is just one of the many pitfalls of "shared-parenting" It has become the "norm" in my area and it also has caused many problems for parents that do not see eye to eye.

All I can say is she filed a motion and I counter filed a motion for decision making rights. We are nearly one year into this and on our 4th pre-trial hearing as of this last Wed. We had a GAL and the interviews just like we were beginning custody all over again. The GAL found in my favor but my ex is fighting it all the way. It was determined that given our situation one parent has to have the final say otherwise the well being of the child would be at stake.

She is allowed to be invovled in any medical therapy or doctor appointments. I on the other hand have the right so far to make the appointments being RP and keep her informed. Her problem comes in if she were to be given the decision making rights she would change everything that was set into place for our child. This is not good when you consider it to be in the best interest.

The only advice I can tell you is that a motion may have to be filed to have the courts clarify the order or to actual state who has the decision making rights. Again, you both may have a clause to participate and dicuss these issues but if you do not agree then one of you has to have the final say. Like it or not.