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>Guess what folks, not one single person visiting
>>this board would be in the position they are if they had not
>>been flawed in whom they chose for a partner in parenting
>>their child/children. >
>So, it's their fault for not knowing that their partner would
>develop a drug habit, become an alcoholic, or turn out to be a
>screwup? It's their fault for not being able to predict that?
>How are you supposed to know in advance? Please tell me,
>because I'll write a book and make a million dollars.
You know what there are always instances where situations come out of the blue, but for the most part people ignore the red flags in a relationship and marry anyway cause they are soooo in loooove and it will all work out! WRONG! People don't change overnight!
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>The system is not perfect and Mist does not deny that.
>There
>>is no one system that will be perfect for everybody. >
>No one said there was or would be any system that will be
>perfect for everybody. Where in the world did you hear anyone
>say that?
All I hear is you complaining that the system is broke la ti da. If there is no system that will be perfect then I guess this one is as good as the next.
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>I have yet to hear any suggestions from any of the
>naysayers
>>posting as to what would make the system better. >
>Maybe not in this thread, but various suggestions have been
>being put forth for YEARS. Please, give me a break. Just
>because you don't hear it here doesn't mean it hasn't
>happened.
It doesn't matter, there will be problems and unhappy people no matter what system is in place.
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>Anything you
>>come up with may be a positive for some, but inherently will
>>be a negative for others. >
>Thank you, Captain Obvious.
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>For instance I am apauled at my situation in that I don't
>>think my X should have ever been allowed to start the
>custody
>>action against me in the first place. >
>What, he should be forced to stay married to you and you to
>him? What gain is there in that? Should only one parent have
>the power to initiate divorce proceedings? Which one, and why?
>How will this sort of thing be fairly determined?
Who said anything about divorce. We have not been together for 13 yrs. I have raised DD by myself. Now he wants to be a real daddy! It may have been fairly determined 13yrs ago if he had given a damn. Why the hell should he be allowed to waltz in this much later and cause the strife and financial burden when he hasn't taken any responsibilty thus far.
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>I on the other hand have provided a safe loving home for
>the
>>child for all her 13 yrs. I have encouraged the X's
>>involvement and his family's. I have provided completely
>for
>>the financials and necessaties for said child. The child is
>a
>>well adjusted straight A student who participates in
>numerous
>>sports and extracurriculars. >
>Well, since the Family Court system is so fair and just, they
>should see this and you should surely prevail, right? *cough*
>It's at least as fair as the
child support system. Oh,
>wait....
Yes, I surely will prevail. The GAL see's the writing on the wall. I wouldn't know about the CS system as I don't get a dime from the X.
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>However, for every
>>thousand people who have been let down there are 100
>thousand
>>that it has worked for just as it was intended. >
>As mistoffolees is so fond of saying, "Show me the evidence".
>You're just pulling those figures out of your butt. Show me
>the proof or stats to back your claim up. Otherwise expect
>mistoffolees to berate you for making unsubstantiated claims.
I wasn't stating it as solid numbers. I am just giving an example. You are just so used to only hearing the negative side of these cases as those are the people here with issues. The ones that things work out fine for don't feel the need to come on message boards and tell everybody how hunky dory things are going.
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>The flaw that
>>starts it all is the parents and the choices they make.>
>That's certainly true in some cases, but not in all. To make a
>blanket statement like that is both ignorant and ridiculous.
Yes, the choice they make to have sex and reproduce with another individual. Don't give me the crap about I didn't choose to have a baby with that moron. Grow up! If your willing to have the sex you better ask yourself "would I want to have a baby with this person?" if the answer is "no" put your clothes back on!
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