Discipline vs. Abuse

[MYSONSDAD]

About two years ago, I posted a local story of how a boyfriend forced a four year old boy to drink liquid dish soap. The child died.

I did not save it, but a google search might bring it up.

I myself, would have the child kneel in the corner, with their nose firmly in place.

[msme]

Spanking around here is a last resort & the child knows well in advance that if a certain behavior doesn't stop they will get spanked & exactly how many times. Usually it is 3 but something horrible would get 5 licks.

Before it gets to that, they are made to write positive affirmations about what took place. The length of the sentence & the number vary with the child & the crime. Remember, we have 8 between 7 & 14.

If the 7 year olds are being stubborn, they might have to write, "I must do as I am told," about 15 or 20 times. While the older ones who are quick to squabble over their things, might write something like, "I know I must respect other peoples property," 50 times.

Usually all it takes is the magic question. "Are you telling me that you want to do some writing?" Boy do they shape up in a hurry.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression!

[kitten]

>I myself, would have the child kneel in the corner, with their
>nose firmly in place.


I agree with the good old time out, nose in the corner method myself.  With a side of talking with the child about why the action is unacceptable.

[Genie]

for using some foul language when doing something. Believe me we never talked that way again.  My Mom made sure it was in between the teeth then we had to sit there for 1/2 hour before we could brush our teeth.

As you can tell I don't think it is abuse.  Now for a 4 yr old that is a little extreme.  Realistically, the toddler used it for the first time b/c she heard someone else (her Mom or Step Dad?) use it and is just repeating it. Toddlers do that when they are learning to talk. You know that.  I think this kind of discipline should be reserved for older children who know better than to say that.  At 4 yrs old the child should be given a time out or something and explained to that this is not a word that he/she will be using in the future.

As for her disciplining in agreed upon manners.  That won't happen.  You know by now that she doesn't care what he wants done or not.

Has DH stopped moping around yet and filed any papers?  Sorry I am harsh hear but you guys had kinda split before b/c of his moping and anger management issues.  Has things gotten better. And you are calling him DH now not BF.  Any news we should know about?

[kitten]

Yes, he has picked himself up and decided to live his life.  We are back together, but not married yet.  Don't know why I used "DH", just typing in a hurry I guess.  He has found better ways to greive.  
He still has not seen the kids.  She still is playing games, PAS etc...
OSS says he lives in a prison because SF won't let them talk or make any noise when he gets home from work.  They are not allowed to ask for anything.  
Basically, without money there is not much BF can do.  This battle has cost in excess of $60, 000.  There is nothing left.