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WHY doesn't the CP have to show proof that the child support is being spend on the child?!?!

Started by caringstepmom, Nov 08, 2005, 09:32:45 AM

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This should absolutely be in effect!

It's not right when the CP claims poor, asks for additional support, and the buys new clothes/shoes/etc. every other week.

Are there any petitions to make something like showing proof happen?


>This should absolutely be in effect!
>It's not right when the CP claims poor, asks for additional
>support, and the buys new clothes/shoes/etc. every other
>Are there any petitions to make something like showing proof

The title should read: show proof that the child support is going to the CHILD, and when I say buys new clothes/shoes/etc...Im not talking about for the child!!!

Just to clarify b/c my post looked very messy!


and I would have NO problem showing proof of what I spend the CS on.
Unfortunately I don't receive any child support.  I do without the things that I need just to make sure that our daughter gets what she needs regardless of whether I receive any CS or not.

Think about it.  Those CPs that really spend the money on frivilous things would just lie and come up with false documents to prove that the money was spent on the child.  

In a perfect world what your recommend would work, but there are always those people out there who know how to work the system with their lies.

It's the same with "some" people on welfare.  I know people on welfare that live a much better life than I do.  They get their hair done, nails done and buy much nicer clothes than I have.  But, that's because they have no problem lying and manipulating the system to get what they want.


My husband pays cs to a woman that does drugs and is an alcoholic.  She doesn't have those nice clothes or a nice house.  My SD has always lived the poor life while her mother gets her durgs and so forth.  Yes, I would like to know what is spent to my SD also.  This woman has everyone so scared of her that we can't even find anyone to help us out and go against her in court.  


Isn't that the truth. I am also a CP who does not get cs.

BUT if I did, I could show my ex receipts for everything I spent cs on, not to hard to do.

In some states you can request a breakdown on how cs is spent BUT, it ain't worth the paper it is written on cuz all the CP has to do is:

xx for rent
xx for food
xx for clothes
and does NOT have to show receipts, pretty easy to write anything down on paper.

Personally I think ALL custodial parents should have to use the new debit credit card thing and then give the CP a copy of the monthly statement that shows WHAT stores the money was spent at, it is a monthly statement just like a credit card, BUT the state forcing the CP's to use this card and give copies of the statement to the NCP will never happen.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**


It will only bring on more problems if that were to be used. First, what if not ALL stores took that card? So then you're forced to shop at a limited number of stores. Second, what if the cp spent $40 on a pair of shoes, and the ncp thought that was excessive? Then they'd be bickering about misuse of the money, or frivolous spending. How would the cp pay the child's portion of the rent/house payment and utilities? How would the cp determine the child's portion of the food and toiletries? What about childcare? If the cp had to attend a wedding, for instance, and hired the neighborhood teenager to babysit. I'm sure the teen wouldn't take that debit card. How would that be paid? I shopped at garage sales for a lot of years. They don't accept debit cards at garage sales.

I have no problem showing where cs goes either. I can spend it on my ds without including food, too. But you have to remember that when two people are no longer married or in a relationship, it's because they didn't get along then. And now that they HAVE to associate with each other because of the child, if those animosities aren't put aside (which they rarely are) then there are going to still be reasons to disagree or nit pick the other person. So even though this system is a good IDEA, it's not feasible cuz it will just cause OTHER problems.
Love me without fear-Need me without demanding-Trust me without question-Want me without restrictions-Accept me without change. Find my soul and I'm yours 4ever


her entire wardrobe (exluding clothes that were given as birthday/christmas gifts) consisted of all garage sale clothes!!!!! LOL!!!
I don't know how I would have survived without garage sales and hand-me-downs from friends!


From someone whose spouse pays CS, it doesn't matter to me what the money is spent on but it would be nice to know that the money is spent for the child.  I don't think it should be for rent, the CP has to have a place to live anyway.  I don't think it should be for electricity or water either.  I don't expect my kids to pay for elec., water or give me money for rent.  I think food and clothes and extra things that the child is involved in.  Lessons of some sort.  If the child wants to go to a movie or a gift for a birthday party then it would come out of the CS.  jmho


A one bedroom apartment is alot cheaper than a two-bedroom apartment where I live.  I have a teenage daughter that takes way too many showers and is constantly in her room with the TV on, the computer on and the radio on.  If I lived alone, my electric bill would be ALOT cheaper!

I also spend alot more money on gas due to having a teenager in the house.  I am constantly driving her to all of her sleepovers, dances and other after-school activities.  

All of these things add up.  My ex thinks that $10 a week for CS should be enought for a 14 year old girl (but he doesn't even pay that).  $10 a week doesn't even cover her school lunches!!!

Just my opinion.


I'm forever on my ds to turn off the lights when he leaves a room. As for the water...HE has more laundry than *I* do. That also causes more in heating bills, cuz our hot water tank runs off of the propane that heats the house. At least one day a weekend, I'm driving him to school for some function, then picking him up and driving him to a party, then going home, waiting until midnight, and heading back out to get him from the part and bringing him back home. That doesn't count the trips DURING the week, to band practice, friends houses, etc.

Don't get me started on shoes and clothes. Ugh...

I used to have an old beat up car. The first time I broke down on the freeway when ds was still in a car seat and had to walk in the snow for a mile to a phone in a bad neighborhood, my stepfather called and asked what color car I wanted. He couldn't see me and my baby not having safe transportation after that, so he offered to lease a car for me...I paid $100 a month, he paid the rest. And quite frankly, I STILL want to know I have reliable transportation when I'm driving my ds somewhere. Besides, why aren't we allowed to have a new car if we work? What makes people think that we are using the cs on the car payment rather than our wages?

That's one thing that irks me at times. People think if the cp gets her nails done or drives a new car that it's coming out of the cs. Well, if we work, what makes them think it's coming out of the cs and not OUR WAGES?

Love me without fear-Need me without demanding-Trust me without question-Want me without restrictions-Accept me without change. Find my soul and I'm yours 4ever