So Tired!

[mistoffolees]

You summed up my points well.

Sorry you had to be attacked by the "I'm so sure the system is broken that I don't have to provide any evidence and I'll launch a hundred personal attacks against anyone who disagrees with me" contingent.

You'd expect more for moderators in a group.

[SPARC Admin]

>Sorry you had to be attacked by the "I'm so sure the system is
>broken that I don't have to provide any evidence and I'll
>launch a hundred personal attacks against anyone who disagrees
>with me" contingent.

So you agree that your current situation is your fault because you picked a "bad" partner, mistoffolees? Since you obviously agree with what she says, you must agree that your divorce was all your fault because of your poor judgment. If so, it's nice to see you finally accept some blame for your situation.



>You'd expect more for moderators in a group.

Stop trying to make us live up to your expectations. That's NOT what we're here for. That whiny "you disappoint me" crap might work on other boards, but it won't work here.

[mistoffolees]

>>Sorry you had to be attacked by the "I'm so sure the
>system is
>>broken that I don't have to provide any evidence and I'll
>>launch a hundred personal attacks against anyone who
>disagrees
>>with me" contingent.
>
>So you agree that your current situation is your fault because
>you picked a "bad" partner, mistoffolees? Since you obviously
>agree with what she says, you must agree that your divorce was
>all your fault because of your poor judgment. If so,
>it's nice to see you finally accept some blame for your
>situation.

Do you ever get tired of making things up and pretending the other person said them?

Yes, much of my divorce was my ex's fault. But some of it was may fault. Divorces happen. You'd think you've have figured that out by now. But the fact that people end up getting divorced for all sorts of reasons doesn't have any bearing on how well the system works.

>
>
>
>>You'd expect more for moderators in a group.
>
>Stop trying to make us live up to your expectations. That's
>NOT what we're here for. That whiny "you disappoint me" crap
>might work on other boards, but it won't work here.

Of course not. I learned that you're not the least bit interested in an unbiased discussion of facts. This board is your site to express your unsubstantiated, biased opinions and to attack anyone who disagrees with them.

You've made that quite clear.

[SPARC Admin]

>Do you ever get tired of making things up and pretending the
>other person said them?

No one made that up. Obviously you can't read, or if you do your comprehension level is very low. She wrote (and I quote):
[blockquote]"not one single person visiting this board would be in the position they are if they had not been flawed in whom they chose for a partner in parenting their child/children."[/blockquote]
Since you agree with what she says, then you must also be agreeing with the 'fact' that your flawed 'choosing skills' are to blame for your divorce. Personally that's one of the stupidest things I've heard in a long time. But apparently you find it valid.



>But the fact that people end up getting
>divorced for all sorts of reasons doesn't have any bearing on
>how well the system works.

Again, your comprehension is appallingly low. No one said that the reasons for divorce had any bearing on "how well the system works". Read again, and this time pay attention.




>Of course not. I learned that you're not the least bit
>interested in an unbiased discussion of facts.

What I'm not interested in is your ceaseless load of self-important bullshit.


>This board is your site to express your unsubstantiated, biased
>opinions and to attack anyone who disagrees with them.

No, that's what you use it for. I do reserve to call BS on people like you who can't be bothered to consider anyone else's opinion or experiences valid. If you'd been paying attention at all then you'd that I rarely post here or get involved in the discussions. Almost never. But even I have limits and I've had my fill of your holier-than-thou attitude and "I know it all" behavior.



>You've made that quite clear.

Apparently not clear enough so you'll take a hint. That's because you don't care what anyone else says or thinks...in your world it's only what mistoffolees believes in that counts. And that's why you can't seem to let go of this. It's another fine quality you display that probably helped sink your marriage like a torpedo below the waterline.

[mistoffolees]

>>Do you ever get tired of making things up and pretending
>the
>>other person said them?
>
>No one made that up. Obviously you can't read, or if you do
>your comprehension level is very low. She wrote (and I
>quote):
>[blockquote]"not one single person visiting this board
>would be in the position they are if they had not been flawed
>in whom they chose for a partner in parenting their
>child/children."[/blockquote]
>Since you agree with what she says, then you must also be
>agreeing with the 'fact' that your flawed 'choosing skills'
>are to blame for your divorce. Personally that's one of the
>stupidest things I've heard in a long time. But apparently you
>find it valid.

Only because your logical thinking skills are so poor. The fact that your choice was flawed doesn't mean that you are to blame - unless you expect perfection.

Excluding those who are perfect (since you obviously consider yourself to be perfect), EVERYONE is imperfect - or flawed.


>
>
>
>
>>Of course not. I learned that you're not the least bit
>>interested in an unbiased discussion of facts.
>
>What I'm not interested in is your ceaseless load of
>self-important bullshit.
>
>
>>This board is your site to express your unsubstantiated,
>biased
>>opinions and to attack anyone who disagrees with them.
>
>No, that's what you use it for. I do reserve to call BS on
>people like you who can't be bothered to consider anyone
>else's opinion or experiences valid. If you'd been paying
>attention at all then you'd that I rarely post here or get
>involved in the discussions. Almost never. But even I
>have limits and I've had my fill of your holier-than-thou
>attitude and "I know it all" behavior.

Funny, but I'm simply pointing out that your not perfect. Almost everyone in the world knows that they're not perfect (I've already admitted that I'm not) except you.

>
>
>
>>You've made that quite clear.
>
>Apparently not clear enough so you'll take a hint. That's
>because you don't care what anyone else says or thinks...in
>your world it's only what mistoffolees believes in that
>counts. And that's why you can't seem to let go of this. It's
>another fine quality you display that probably helped sink
>your marriage like a torpedo below the waterline.

Once again, you're pretending you know something about a situation that you know nothing about. I'm terribly sorry I'm not perfect like you.

[SPARC Admin]

>The fact that your choice was flawed doesn't mean that you are to
>blame - unless you expect perfection.

Well, that's what she said, and you agreed with her.


>Excluding those who are perfect (since you obviously consider
>yourself to be perfect), EVERYONE is imperfect - or flawed.

There you go, making stuff up again.



>Funny, but I'm simply pointing out that your not perfect.

Never said I was, but that won't stop you from claiming such a thing. (I'm not surprised, since you never let facts get in the way of your diatribes.) Let's see who's making things up, shall we? I'll give you cash money if you can show me where I ever said I'm perfect. Show me the post mistoffolees, or admit you're just making it up as you go along.



>Almost everyone in the world knows that they're not perfect
>(I've already admitted that I'm not) except you.

Zzzzzzzzzzz. Wake me when you have something interesting to say.



>I'm terribly sorry I'm not perfect like you.

I forgive you for being so deeply flawed. lol :)

[escape2paradise]

>>Guess what folks, not one single person visiting
>>this board would be in the position they are if they had not
>>been flawed in whom they chose for a partner in parenting
>>their child/children.  
>
>So, it's their fault for not knowing that their partner would
>develop a drug habit, become an alcoholic, or turn out to be a
>screwup? It's their fault for not being able to predict that?
>How are you supposed to know in advance? Please tell me,
>because I'll write a book and make a million dollars.

You know what there are always instances where situations come out of the blue, but for the most part people ignore the red flags in a relationship and marry anyway cause they are soooo in loooove and it will all work out!  WRONG!  People don't change overnight!

>
>
>
>>The system is not perfect and Mist does not deny that.
>There
>>is no one system that will be perfect for everybody.  
>
>No one said there was or would be any system that will be
>perfect for everybody.  Where in the world did you hear anyone
>say that?


All I hear is you complaining that the system is broke la ti da.  If there is no system that will be perfect then I guess this one is as good as the next.

>
>
>
>>I have yet to hear any suggestions from any of the
>naysayers
>>posting as to what would make the system better.  
>
>Maybe not in this thread, but various suggestions have been
>being put forth for YEARS. Please, give me a break. Just
>because you don't hear it here doesn't mean it hasn't
>happened.

It doesn't matter, there will be problems and unhappy people no matter what system is in place.
>
>
>>Anything you
>>come up with may be a positive for some, but inherently will
>>be a negative for others.  
>
>Thank you, Captain Obvious.
>
>
>
>
>>For instance I am apauled at my situation in that I don't
>>think my X should have ever been allowed to start the
>custody
>>action against me in the first place.
>
>What, he should be forced to stay married to you and you to
>him? What gain is there in that? Should only one parent have
>the power to initiate divorce proceedings? Which one, and why?
>How will this sort of thing be fairly determined?

Who said anything about divorce.  We have not been together for 13 yrs.  I have raised DD by myself.  Now he wants to be a real daddy!  It may have been fairly determined 13yrs ago if he had given a damn.  Why the hell should he be allowed to waltz in this much later and cause the strife and financial burden when he hasn't taken any responsibilty thus far.  
>
>
>
>
>>I on the other hand have provided a safe loving home for
>the
>>child for all her 13 yrs.  I have encouraged the X's
>>involvement and his family's.  I have provided completely
>for
>>the financials and necessaties for said child.  The child is
>a
>>well adjusted straight A student who participates in
>numerous
>>sports and extracurriculars.  
>
>Well, since the Family Court system is so fair and just, they
>should see this and you should surely prevail, right? *cough*
>It's at least as fair as the child support system. Oh,
>wait....

Yes, I surely will prevail.  The GAL see's the writing on the wall. I wouldn't know about the CS system as I don't get a dime from the X.  

>
>
>
>>However, for every
>>thousand people who have been let down there are 100
>thousand
>>that it has worked for just as it was intended.
>
>As mistoffolees is so fond of saying, "Show me the evidence".
>You're just pulling those figures out of your butt. Show me
>the proof or stats to back your claim up. Otherwise expect
>mistoffolees to berate you for making unsubstantiated claims.

I wasn't stating it as solid numbers.  I am just giving an example.  You are just so used to only hearing the negative side of these cases as those are the people here with issues.  The ones that things work out fine for don't feel the need to come on message boards and tell everybody how hunky dory things are going.
>
>
>
>
>>The flaw that
>>starts it all is the parents and the choices they make.
>
>That's certainly true in some cases, but not in all. To make a
>blanket statement like that is both ignorant and ridiculous.

Yes, the choice they make to have sex and reproduce with another individual.  Don't give me the crap about I didn't choose to have a baby with that moron.  Grow up!  If your willing to have the sex you better ask yourself "would I want to have a baby with this person?" if the answer is "no" put your clothes back on!
>
>
>

[escape2paradise]

>You summed up my points well.
>
>Sorry you had to be attacked by the "I'm so sure the system is
>broken that I don't have to provide any evidence and I'll
>launch a hundred personal attacks against anyone who disagrees
>with me" contingent.
>
>You'd expect more for moderators in a group.
 
No problem! It's actually been rather entertaining listening to the rantings!  Yes, this particular moderator seems just a tad unbalanced in both logic and mental capacity!  Ahh well, some people can't stop themselves. If this individual was anything like this in court, I can see why they were very unhappy with the outcome!!!

[SPARC Admin]

>>You'd expect more for moderators in a group.

Get a clue. As I mentioned earlier, we're not here to live up to your expectations. If you're unable to grasp that concept, there are plenty of other divorce and custody boards for you to go whine on. Please feel free to spread your wisdom on one of them- I'm sure it will be given the deep appreciation it deserves.



>No problem! It's actually been rather entertaining listening
>to the rantings!  Yes, this particular moderator seems just a
>tad unbalanced in both logic and mental capacity!

I see...and you got your Armchair Psychology degree from what university? Also, just for the record, I'm not a moderator. I'm the administrator. (That's why my posting name says "SPARC Admin". I realize that may have been too tricky for you to figure out.)



>If this individual was
>anything like this in court, I can see why they were very
>unhappy with the outcome!!!

Unfortunately for you, this shows just how uninformed you really are.

Actually I've been very happy with my "outcome" in court.  I was given sole custody of my son, and I don't pay child support, I receive it. (Or I would if my ex would pay it, but that rarely happens.)

So basically, you haven't gotten a single thing right. Try paying a little more attention next time so you can keep up.

[SPARC Admin]

>You know what there are always instances where situations come
>out of the blue,

Thank you for admitting that, and for contradicting yourself.


>People don't change overnight!

Actually, some people do. You're obviously not very experienced when it comes to humans.




>All I hear is you complaining that the system is broke la ti
>da.  If there is no system that will be perfect then I guess
>this one is as good as the next.

By your way of "thinking", we should all go back to oil lamps and horse drawn carts. (It was a good system.) Your ignorance it breathtaking and your endless supply of foolish statements is positively amusing. If this is the way you think, no wonder you picked a loser.





>It doesn't matter, there will be problems and unhappy people
>no matter what system is in place.

That's so profound. And your point is what, exactly?




>Yes, I surely will prevail.

Lol, famous last words. The system might work in this instance. Anything is possible.



>The GAL see's the writing on the
>wall. I wouldn't know about the CS system as I don't get a
>dime from the X.

Neither do I. My ex rarely pays any support. Does Support Enforcement do anything? Nope. So, as you can see, the system is working fine.



>I wasn't stating it as solid numbers.  I am just giving an
>example.

Oh, a personal anecdote? Personal experience? Sorry, but by mistoffolees standards, you fail.



>If your
>willing to have the sex you better ask yourself "would I want
>to have a baby with this person?" if the answer is "no" put
>your clothes back on!

Too bad for the world you didn't do that. And I guess you were too ignorant to use birth control, too. Yeah, you're just the person we should all be listening too on matters like this. *cough*