Worried:custody and support

[mynameisDAD]

MY ex has had full custody for 9 years , now my daughter is 13 and lives with me but i dont have custody and i just have been keeping the child support to better take care of her along with my other 2 daughters but nothing has been done legally. The ex called me 13 months ago and said she wanted our daughter to move in with me because they clashed to much and she really couldnt deal with a teenager(spends all her time with her other daughter)Now i want to at least have joimt custody and some child support for my daughter because she deserves it and what god for the goose is good for the gander. I live in kentucky what are my chances and waht should i do . Thank you

[nosonew]

Well, first thing I would do is this:

If you and ex get along well enough, have your attorney write up a change, ie: residential custody with you, she gets xxx visitation, and as of ____ date, child support is no longer valid.  (Go back to when you quit paying).  Otherwise, you still owe the arrears because it wasn't done legally.  DONT mention right now you want c.s.!

Once this is all signed all legally, it needs submitted to the court under the relevant case, etc.  Now, wait 2-3 months, then file for c.s. from her.  If you ask for c.s. NOW, she is less likely to sign anything, and may choose to take daughter back, which she can do.  

Im sure others will have great ideas and suggestions...so be sure to look at everything and take what works best in your situation.  

[smtotwo]

DON"T file for support immediately.  2 things will come from it.
First, the court will look at you like you only want the money (God knows they'd NEVER look at a woman this way) and Second, psychomommy WILL take both the child and the support your ordered along with the arrears.

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT to file for support until after your order for custody has been entered.

[mynameisDAD]

Also does it matter if my child wants to stay with me and she said she will back me up by telling lawyer or judge the same

[nosonew]

Most states don't have an "age" that a child can state whom they wish to live with...however...in our case, our 13 could choose.  Also, since she has lived with you for over a year...has an established home, school, friends, etc....it is less likely a judge would change the status quo...I suggested getting your ex to agree without going to court if possible, but if that is impossible...your chances (if you aren't a convicted sex offended, druggie, alcoholic, etc.)..should be good, especially if the child is wanting to live with you.

Best of luck and keep us informed!