Erin Brockavich?

[tjraid18]

 This is out there but desperate measures call for desperate means ----- or something like that. I was watching the movie Erin brockavich last night and there was a part that got the old gears spinning again. I have posted a few times on here but am still very new. Some of my posts insinuate that we should all get together , combine our forces, recources, and voices and try to do something more!!! For our children. There is a scene in the movie where Erin says they need to get all of the plaintffs together in court and get something done. She is not even an attorney (in fact she despises attorneys) and ends up taking down an industrial giant for all the right reasons almost singlehandedly through sheer determination. Arent our reasons important? Don't we have determination. Theres a lot of folks who are being denied their children and payng and suffering because of it. I see a lot of good effort and good folks trying to do as much as they can. But it's rarely enough. Maybe if we all got together, things could get done more effectively. What does everybody think? Am I dreamin'?

[Peanutsdad]

The key there,, was most of those folks lived somewhat near one another in that movie,, right?

Here,, we are all scattered all over the country. Most of the parents here do well to keep their cs paid, much less trying to put together a national movement.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again,, most ncp spend every waking hour working, paying, trying, and hurting. There simply are not the extra hours, dollars nor energy left. The courts, the evaluators, the attorneys and the ex suck it all up.

Sooner or later, it WILL happen,,, when enough people who HAVE been thru it, when enough children grow up outraged, when enough celebrities decide its PC to be outraged.

[tjraid18]

 Hi peanutsdad- Nice to "meet" you. Your right about being scattered all over. But with some good planning and effort, it's gotta be worth a try. Maybe some of us could put more into it than others. But I think it could get done. As long as eveyone involved put some effort into it and would stand with everyone else when it was time to take the plan we would come up with to court. I don't know, I just want to have the rights as a parent that I should automatically be entitled to as a citizen of the greatest free country in the world-- know what I mean? What was I supposed to tell my daughter 3 years ago when she was 4 and said "why don't you just tell the judge you want to see us more and that you can't?" I told her it's not that simple, but she does'nt understand that. She is all hope & trust & love. Or was. Children have ideas about judges and policemen and firemen---- and fathers. I'll make the time and the effort because the purity and innocene in my daughters eyes told me too. And I am her dad!!! Or at least I'll try like you know what, thanks for the feedback------tjraid18

[Peanutsdad]

What you may not realize,,

This website is a major step in what you envision.

10 years ago,, NO such resource as this existed.

10 years before that, no man would dream of bucking the system and going for custody except in the most dire circumstances,, and even then,, most times did not win.

Go back another 10-20 years and no men went for custody nor did society as a whole expect them to. You were expected to lose everyhing in your divorce, never see our kids, skip out on your child support and put up with your ex cussing you out at every turn.


So,, changes ARE occuring. Societal mores and gender expectations/bias' dont change overnight. That is a generational project.

[tjraid18]

 agreed. Thanx. It's good to get input, it helps.

[mandi]

TJ, It all sounds like a great idea and all, but i will have to agree with peanut.  Slowly but surely, things for father's will get easier.  The only thing that the father's need to do, is to NEVER give up and keep everything, so that if in a worst case, some one loses their rights and their child(ern) come looking ofr them later on in life, you have all this proof that you did not just give up on your kids and you did not just walk out on them.  It is very sad that the court system is the way it is toward the fathers' that actually try to have something to do with their kids.  Keep up the good work.
*~Mandi~*

[tjraid18]

 Gracias

[Brent]

>I was watching the movie
>Erin brockavich last night and there was a part that got the
>old gears spinning again.

Yes, well, ummm, don't forget that that was a movie, not real life. Based on fact perhaps, but that's not the same thing.


>but am still very new. Some of my posts insinuate that we
>should all get together , combine our forces, recources, and
>voices and try to do something more!!!

Many people have suggested this, but few are willing to do anything. Are you? It's easy to make suggestions on an internet message board, much harder to actually do something. My suggestion is not to wait for us or anyone else to endorse your idea and turn it into reality, but to start doing something yourself. If it's good, people will follow. The guy that started this place didn't wait for people to tell him it was a good idea, he just went ahead and did it. If he waited to get everyone's buy-in first, you'd be browsing another site right now.



>is a scene in the movie where Erin says they need to get all
>of the plaintffs together in court and get something done. She
>is not even an attorney (in fact she despises attorneys) and
>ends up taking down an industrial giant for all the right
>reasons almost singlehandedly through sheer determination.

Remember, that was a movie, produced on a Hollywood soundstage. Thisngs tend to go swimmingly in movies, because everyone likes a happy ending.  



>Maybe if we all got together, things could get
>done more effectively. What does everybody think? Am I
>dreamin'?

The father's/parent's movement has tried to organize for years, especially the father's movement) and nothing ever comes of it. There are reasons for this that are too involved to go into here, but they exist and they're formidable.

Don't hold your breath; my advice is to go out and start something yourself if you want to see it happen. Unless *you* are willing to take responsibility, work like a dog, and get it off the ground, don't expect it to happen. Everyone will tell you it's a good idea, even me, but that doesn't get it any closer to happening.

Again, unless *you* are personally willing to take responsibility and do whatever it takes it to happen, don't expect it to spring into being. It's a lot easier to make suggestions than to implement them.

[tjraid18]

  Hi Brent, Thanks for the feedback. Youre right on both counts. I just don't know how to start something like this by myself and am feeling around for support. And you know how inspiring Julie Roberts can be.

[Rysimps0419]

Your point is very well taken and I couldn't agree more. Numbers speak loudly!!! I have been working with my son on a custody and visitation for his infant son and I am appalled at how the legal system works. They say "What is in the best interst of the child." I have questions about this....My son has had numerous false allegations placed against him 3 restraining orders which were denied. I say we need to ban together and get them to start enforcing the laws that are in place. It states in the Florida Staues that if you are placing false allegations against someone for domestic violence you can be prosecuted. I am wondering why this woman hasen't been prosecuted yet and why she is still able to make cause problems for my son. We all need to stick together and come up with some solutions. My sons, son is 6 month old and because of this womans frivulous accusations he still has not got to see him yet. It is pyschological damaging to keep a child away from his father espeicially a father who wants to be a part of his sons life, he is very responsible, paying child support before it was ever court ordered, has taken child care classes, and has a great reputation.

With warmest regards,
Sandy
[email protected] Please feel free to email my son if you have any suggestions.