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Messages - Amy_in_MA

#1
Child Support Issues / Some good news!
May 08, 2007, 06:16:05 AM
Apparently the conversation I had with the supervisor at DOR/CSE made a difference. A phone call DID get made to the employer for whom I provided information to DOR back in February, and confirmation was given that dad is a full-time employer there. So, the wage withholding order has been sent to them for processing! YEAH!!!!!!!

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#2
That lovely little (and I do mean little) payment that gets sent in just before the 8 week mark (here in MA) before you are first eligible through DOR to file for contempt. Dad is 45 minutes away in NH...he and his then girlfriend moved 8 weeks after son was born to NH from their 10-minute away from son location.

I've worked really hard to be in a position where I am ok supporting our son without the child support. I think (with this next paycheck) I may be there and I was just promoted. It still doesn't make up for all the years of debt I carried when things were short or had to be charged because the "cash" had to be saved to pay daycare. Ah well. I'm grateful we've been able to make do no matter what. I shouldn't complain.

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#3
I have been calling DOR (who handles CSE here in MA) for almost 3 months now (actually more like over 3 years, but just in this cycle it's been about 3 months) to get them to enforce the wage assignment order we have (back from 2002...it was active until he became unemployed and then unemployment ran out in 2003...he has subsequently found work and is working full-time and has been for some time).

Back on February 20th, I provided them with employer information (obtained from my ex's myspace page, of all places). DOR told me that they already had a wage assignment packet out (as per my request February 7), but it was not the employer I had just provided them with information for. They cannot send out any additional wage assignment packets until this one is "resolved" (made active, they are told he doesn't work there, whatever).

After weeks and weeks of having to follow up (because the employer hasn't responded to the packet, or to numerous phone calls they have made to verify his employment), I got the same apathetic worker I spoke to last week. I asked what steps they take when employers are non-compliant. She told me "we sent them another wage assignment package." I asked how that enforces everything, and she started to give me another standard apathetic response. I asked to speak to a supervisor.

The supervisor and seemed to understand what I was saying. I asked what steps they take if an employer is non-compliant. He said "well, this is just one of the steps we take...we have to document that we have tried to contact them numerous times before we can claim that they are non-compliant with the law and do anything about it." I told him that while I understand that, and that while I know they cannot confirm for me who the employer is that they have sent the wage assignment package to, I can tell them that I know he has two jobs. And one of those jobs is for (XYZ COMPANY)...and that is a part-time job. As such, even if the employer DOES respond, the 65% garnishment issue will come into effect and what will be withheld/sent in will be minimal. He was very interested in hearing that and basically, unofficially confirmed for me that that is in fact who they have sent the wage assignment order to.

So, he put a note to request a phone call into the employer that I gave them the information for back in February and just ask if he is in fact employed there. Two, he would note that the employer to whom they have sent a wage assignment order may in fact be only a part-time employer and as such, be impacted by the 65% income withholding rules. I asked him if one week was enough time for me to wait before checking back to find out the status. He said "at least that long."

*sigh* It irks me so much that he can just not provide this information himself...it would be SO much easier and it would just be done. He said "well, the last payment you received was sent directly by him." I said "I understand that, but if you notice, he pays sporadically, and he's always very, very short on the amount. And there is an order for wage assignment for a reason."

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#4
I've gone to see them in person once...and just once. And that was to provide them with my Excep spreadsheet that showed all of the payments and amounts my son's dad had made...because they hadn't tracked them properly and were showing him in arrears. I took 3 hours off from work to get this done...gave them the spreadsheets, signed an affidavit. And he can't just simply call them to give them his employer's contact info when he changes jobs? It's irritating.

But, going down in person for this gets me no different answers then I get on the phone. I have the wage assignment order. I've had it for years. They just don't seem compelled to enforce it if he is paying ANY amount of his ordered support "voluntarily". It's only when he pays nothing, like right now, for weeks that they seem to push to go ahead and enforce wage assignment by trying to track down his employer. And it shouldn't be that way. It's a court order. :(

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#5
I'm in MA. My son's father and I have had a support order with wage assignment in place since paternity was established back in 2001. For the most part, it's worked fairly well until a few years ago when he was laid off. Sometimes he sends payments in, sometimes he doesn't, and it's rarely for the full amount when it's sent in, so he is about $2500 in arrears. He's also way over due on his portion of uninsured medical expenses ($600), but those don't go through CSE.

Many months ago I called and asked DOR (our CSE agency locally) why the wage assignment wasn't being used if they had his employer on file. They basically said that because he was sending payments in (didn't matter if it was the right amount as long as he sent in something), they wouldn't change the way it was done. I reiterated to the agent that we have a court order that says it is supposed to be through wage assignment. So he tells me they will send out a packet to the employer, who then has 30 days to respond. Several months go by and no wage assignment, sporadic payments. I call again. They tell me they never heard back from the employer.Ok, fine. Then they should be able to make a follow-up phone call to find out. They told me it had been too long since they sent out the packet for them to do that, and they would have to send a whole new packet to the employer, wait another 30 days, etc. etc. Apparently, it was my job to flag them when 30 days had gone by with no wage assignment happening. Eventually they heard back from the employer that he's no longer employed there.

So, a couple of months ago I found out the name of his employer (wouldn't it be easier if he would just notify DOR/CSE himself?). I provided CSE that information. They replied that they had another employer named on file, it had come up in a SSN scan, and they were sending a packet out to THAT employer. Ok, so now we're into waiting 30 days again. I wait 45 days, just for good measure, and I ask the status. They tell me they haven't heard anything, they will make a note to have a follow-up call made, it should be made within a week or two. I wait two weeks, ask again. They tell me to be patient, the call hasn't been made yet. Now, they can't send out a wage assignment packet to the employer I gave them until they get a response from THIS employer...by the time they get this all wrapped up, he won't be employed there anymore. I wait another two weeks. Yesterday, I call. The woman I spoke to put me on hold. She came back and told me that she had bumped it up in priority to a supervisor because 1) CSE still had not made a follow-up phone call (60+ days after sending out the wage assignment package to the employer), and 2) since he hasn't been sending any support in, they've decided they really need to trake action with this. All they really needed to do was look at the history over the past 4 years and they could see what's been going on. She assured me that within a few days a call will have been made to the employer they mailed the packet to in the beginning of February. And if they got "he's not employed there", they would send a packet out to the employer I gave them info on back in early February.

Is it really this difficult to get a court order followed in other states to?????

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#6

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#7
Child Support Issues / Reckoning day....
Jul 26, 2006, 07:48:49 AM
is rolling around soon, isn't it?

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#8
Visitation Issues / RE: Do you think that Z
May 15, 2007, 01:49:15 PM
I don't know...I think he would at first. I think, if I had told the attorney this morning that he doesn't really want to see him that she would have pushed the issue with him and let him drop out of the picture. And I've told her that I have questioned myself what the best answer is, to have him in his life or not...but then I try to remind myself that it really isn't my decision, he'll have made it all on his own by his lack of involvement with his son. At some point, Zachary won't want to bother any more...the only reason I've done anything about this is because it IS a safety concern...and I'd never forgive myself if I knowingly let him go...it's like condoning the neglect. Maybe Rob will think twice before just leaving the kids unattended again...I don't know...but he knows I'm not playing games with the safety of our son...whether he cares or not.

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#9
Visitation Issues / RE: Sometimes I wonder
May 15, 2007, 12:24:10 PM
The attorney just called me. She called Rob, talked to him (briefly as he basically told her he's a really busy guy). She explained that I was very concerned, that I had tried to reach him, left him a voice mail, sent him email, to which he basically said "what? I didn't get those, I don't have time to check email" and then two minutes later referenced me saying that Zachary ran into the street to get his ball, which I only mentioned in the email...so she knew he was lying. He told her "I TOLD her I was working really hard on that situation, and if he's without a car seat it's only for an hour, I mean 5 minutes" and she told him that he needed to call me, by Friday, and let me know if the situation was resolved because he was scheduled for visitation this Saturday. He said he didn't know if he'd be able to take care of it by then because he's so busy and she told him that Zachary wouldn't be going with him on Saturday if that was the case...but that he should call and let me know. She told him to make life easier on himself and to communicate with me...he insists that if the boys are outside that either he or his 11 year old daughter are outside with them supervising (which I know is not true). She told him that seeing as I don't even know the kind of street he lives on, how busy it is, etc., to think about it from my perspective, that I don't know what I'm sending my child into at this point. She asked for his address and he said that he's been living at the same address for the past 4 years. She said "well what about when you were separated from your wife just a couple of months ago?" Rob said that he has been living back with her for a month now. Zachary said this wasn't the case as of the last visit they had, 1.5 weeks ago...so I think this is BS. She told him to make his life easier and communicate with me, that none of us want to see this go anywhere. He basically said he was busy, had to go, and hung up on her. She called him back and left a message letting him know that she didn't know if he'd hung up on her, but that she expected a phone call back from him, that they needed to talk, that he could call her in the 5 minutes he has alone in his car after work...that we are all busy people but these things need to be resolved. She told me that if I didn't hear from him by Friday, Zachary is not going with him.

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen
#10
She's the mother of a friend of my son's in school as well. She and her partner sat down with this morning because of the ongoing safety and supervision concerns I have had lately (dad not using a car seat for son, not supervising their play when they are out by the street--my son went into the street last time to retrieve a ball, dad was inside the house watching the ball game).

The attorney and her partner said we have to be careful not to paint ourselves into a corner because if we tell dad he has to address these things or we take him to court, he'll basically just stop visitation altogether because that's easier for him and he basically doesn't really care. So, she's going to give him a call as my friend, but also let him know that she is an attorney, and basically that I was talking to her about it and she was calling to let him know how concerned I am. If that doesn't seem to be getting a response from him, there is always the option of taking him to court for the arrears, uninsured medical expenses, and low and behold, calling DSS regarding the lack of supervision/safety, which would end up getting all of the other children and their mothers involved...something he isn't likely to want to have happen. But, treading carefully is important so he doesn't just abandon our son altogether...because our son would hurt for that and then dad would be saying it was all my fault. If he hasn't returned her call by Friday with a solution to at least the car seat situation, I'm not to let our son go on visitation on Saturday. I really hope it doesn't come to that.

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Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil.

     ~ James Allen