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Started by I cry_ in_the_dark, Jan 16, 2005, 12:26:56 PM

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I cry_ in_the_dark

Daughter says:
i am scared to ask dad if i can go to the dance..

Daughter says:
i will try to wait until step-mom is not around mwahah

Daughter says:
i think i will just ask now neways .. ughhh wish me luck brb

Terri says:
if i do go like if they dont cancel it will you give me a ride home?

I say:
tonite?

Daughter says:
yeah

I say:
won't they?

Daughter says:
i dont know.. he said he would take me..... but i dont know about picking me up.. (he said it depends on the weeeeeeeeeeatttthhher

I say:
oh good gawd, he has 4w drive

Daughter says:
he said you have to share a little too

Am I a fruitcake?
(NOTE: This convo copy and pasted with names omitted.)

MixedBag

to show your daughter you're there for her no matter what.

In this case, no matter how -- ummm--- the other parent is.

If it's not your weekend, I really don't get the answer she got.

And if I remember correctly, you live close enough to step up to the plate and be there for her.  She'll remember that.

Or pick her up and take her back to yours because your EX abandoned her and take her back to your EXs in the morning....

Nope, just take her back this time....and show her who really cares.

Sunshine1

What's the question?  Sounds like he doesn't want to get his big butt off the couch to drive her home in the middle of the night...so you get to.

Was that your question? :)

wendl

Go pick her up it your ex won't. Your daughter will remember they you were the one that came and got her no matter what the weather was.

**These are my opinions, they are not legal advice**

I cry_ in_the_dark

Right.......THIS TIME!!!

I told her this would not be a habit, and she understands that.

HE wanted custody, then why shouldn't he get to do all the goodies that I did for the last 5 years all by myself?


Nope, it's not my weekend.

I cry_ in_the_dark

There was no question.

Heading states...comments.

So...I go pick her up and he has me arrested for what...kidnapping? Who knows?

That's my X for ya. I drafted a letter to him tonite:

This is to advise you that if in the future I should be required to pick up the children from activities during your periods of custody, I must have a personal request from you prior to the occasion.

Should I not have a request from you, I will deliver the children to my home and contact the proper authorities.

How's that for letting him shirk his duties?

MixedBag

Why?  We all know that you don't want to make it a habit on his weekends.

We all know that he's being .....

But what's more important is that your daughter knows you'll be there and over time, this will totally work against dad and to your advantage.

I'd be saying the same thing if the daughter was calling Dad to pick her up on Mom's weekend.

Stupid move on the CP's part.....take advantage.

Sunshine1

See, I joined/frequent this board because then I can see the other side of things.  Really?  Would he have you arrested?

Ok, if it were me the letter is crazy, but I don't know your ex.  I would pick her up because that is what we always have to do. Pick up the slack for the CP/NCP constantly.  Custody is always temporary, the more you are involved the better it is for you.

Yes, he wanted custody and he SHOULD have all the fun of doing everything on his own but that isn't right either.  Man I wish you were my BM or in my case the BF, we would get along famously.  I would kill for him to pick the kids up or be willing to do so.  I am in your boat only reversed.  Unless he can have his wife around he wants nothing to do with the kids.  I am on the verge of losing it!

Anyway this isn't about me.  I would seize this opportunity and go and get her..she will remember that you do all these things for her.

catherine

1) why is daughter asking the day of, to go.  That doesn't leave planning for anyone.

2) "oh good gawd, he has 4w drive" isn't being exactly nice about the other parent, regardless of how they treat you or talk about you, you have a duty to be the better person too!

Not trying to be unpopular with you or make you upset, just observing the conversation.

So, did she go, and did you pick her up?

I cry_ in_the_dark

I never have a clue what that man is going to do.

Yes, he does some really idiotic things. Like when it was still joint custody, he repeatedly brought my girl home days early week after week, and then pressed contempt charges on me! (Yes, he was laughed out of court.)

Then last Christmas, he showed up at my home 2 days early to take the kids, and then called the police on me! (Yes, they told him to go on home.)

So I have to keep on my toes and stay one step ahead.

Lets see...I should go out at 10 at night to pick up a child from an activity so dad can sleep...but...I am not allowed to pick up my son from school on my visitation days so it "doesn't disrupt his schedule", and lose an hour and a half of visitation? Don't you think this is all just a little bit BS?