can child support be denied

[raf]

According to the NC CS calculator you would have to pay $343.55/mth in CS.
That is based on the info where you said the CP makes $100,000 and you make $30,000.

Are you saying that the rest of your expenses are so great that you can't pay the $343.55?

[LESLIEONE1]

well i bought a house to keep my kids in the school district. monthy payment 1000 add car payment 279 very minimal credit cards about 50 per month, food, elect, phone..I do not live or should I say have not been living out of my means.  I depended o child support when i bought my house as ex had not had given any indication he would try to get physical custody.

[MixedBag]

I'm hoping she comes back and explains and hasn't been scared away.

[MixedBag]

take a look at my post....

and now readjust your life as the cards have been dealt

[Peanutsdad]

Like you, I had a mortgage, a car payment, cs and an attorney to pay,,,,, it came out I could pay the car payment or the attorney.

I let the car go. I drive a 20 yr old car now. It's ugly, but it runs and it starts every time I get in it.


So, it's not a matter of you CANT pay, it's  a matter of you dont want to cut your expenses.

[POC]

It's unfortunate that so many are ripping Leslie for saying the very things that male NCP's say on these boards every day. The guidelines are not in the best interests of children. In fact they are based upon tobacco and alcohold consumption - hardly needs of children.

The fact that she is a female NCP does not make what she is saying any less right. Showing vindictive attitudes on this issue serves about as much purpose of person in the holocaust badgering a German who is heading for the gas chamber too. Even if that German had previously profited from in some way, there is no good to come to other holocaust victims by the death of another.

Hopefully justice will find its way to Leslie while she is a NCP. If so, it will be a benefit to all kids.

[Peanutsdad]

POC,


I'm not ripping her, I'm simply saying, she was ok with the system when she was RECIEVING cs, but now that she has to pay,, there's a problem.

I too had to shoulder a cs burden that decimated me financially, and I had to make choices.

Her query is if there is any way to get out of this,,, essentially, no, there isnt.

Is it legal what the states do? Technically, yes it is. Is it constitutional? Technically, until it's judged unconstitutional, yes it is.

Is it right? Hell no.


Do I empathize with her? Yes I do, I've BTDT and suffered for it. But as to any way out of it?? Sincerely doubt it.

[Peanutsdad]

POC,


I'm not ripping her, I'm simply saying, she was ok with the system when she was RECIEVING cs, but now that she has to pay,, there's a problem.

I too had to shoulder a cs burden that decimated me financially, and I had to make choices.

Her query is if there is any way to get out of this,,, essentially, no, there isnt.

Is it legal what the states do? Technically, yes it is. Is it constitutional? Technically, until it's judged unconstitutional, yes it is.

Is it right? Hell no.


Do I empathize with her? Yes I do, I've BTDT and suffered for it. But as to any way out of it?? Sincerely doubt it.

[jilly]

I agree with what PD said...it's not because she's female and is now having to pay child support. It's because her initial post (and subsequent posts) have all been about how she can't maintain her standard of living because she now has to pay child support instead of receiving it and she wants to know if there's a way she can stop paying child support because she can't afford to pay it. She's paying $1,000/month for a house, which she bought because she was receiving child support at the time she bought it. Now that she has to pay child support she can't afford the house.
I think everyone here can empathize with the fact that when you have to pay child support it puts a serious strain on your finances because what is brought home isn't enough to pay what's going out. That's how the guidelines are set up and it sucks.
As for nobody ripping into a non-custodial father for saying the very things that Leslie is saying...that's not true.  A few months ago there was a poster (male - NCP) who was asking about information he thought he'd seen on this board about a book that told you how to get out of paying child support. He was quickly torn to shreds for trying to find a way to get out of his legal and moral responsibility to his children. That's what's happening with Leslie.

[LESLIEONE1]

Ok, first of all this was my very first post to SPARC. I came here for support, opinions, understanding, and hopefully to share and receive from others that have been through the same kind of situation.  I certainly did not plan on getting "crucefied" so to speak.  All I have done from the day of my divorce was what was best for my kids.  Yes I purchased a home that I would not have been able to afford with out CS.  But I downsized more than half of what I had and I purchased a home to keep my children in the school district that they were attending, as this was important to them and myself.  At the time of divorce I was only employed part time so that I could be home when my kids got home from school, as there father has a job that he goes out of town weekly and home late.  I had full physical custody of my kids, and everyone was ok, ex never indicated that a year later he would try to get custody. By that time I had already purchased my home. We went to court and CS was cut in half due to 50/50 week with me, week with day. So I worked full time and got a second part time job. Only working the 2nd job when the kids were at their dads.  Yes a mistake to depend on CS, but too late now.  I do not have a high standard of living, I have a home, no credit cards and a old vehicle to drive. I did not sit around and eat bon bons living off CS.

My post was intened to mean can EX say he doesn't want it? Yes I know the law and the requirements of child support especially here in NC.  Some have said you might have to pay $17 per week, ok that would be fine, but in NC  my requirements would be more around $400. no where close to $17 per week.  I never received alimony, partly because I had a bad attorney, too late for that now, I never asked for more money from ex. What kind of a parent can you be if you can not even offer a home to your children, or your working non-stop to pay CS to someone that doesnt need it and very little time to spend with your children? I was never crying for sympathy, thank God because this was not the place for that or understanding.  

Bottom line, EVERYONES situation is different and you truly cannot judge my situation unless you knew every detail in it. The emotional part, the bitterness, the unforgiving, we all have our own stories and situations. Its too bad that my first time here has been so unpleasant. I thought this was a different kind of place, obviously its not!