sick toddler

[Gram]

My grandchild is under 2 and the BF is supposed to have visitation but the child is vomiting, running a fever and has been since last week's visit. What is the norm for visits with a sick child? I know that the BF needs to know how to care for him, but I don't think the child should have to be taken out when so ill. We've offered to allow the visit to take place here, but the BF doesn't like to do that.

[Giggles]

nm

[ocean]

Offer make-up time but if he wants the child and it is not a far drive, I would let the child go. Fathers can take care of their kids too (even when they are sick :)  )

[Pixie]

Ocean I have to disagree just a bit.

Although yes father could care for sick child, it isn't in the childs best interest to take a vomitting child w/ a fever who feels bloody aweful and is under the age of 2 and ask the child / aka toddler to move to another place to continue being sick.

My experience is most little ones want to stay w/ their mama when sick and vomitting... but that is just what I have learned w/ my two kids.

I think make up time is a good idea, but keeping in mind teh age of the child (under 2) and that the child is vomitting... a car ride isn't a great idea. :(

[wysiwyg]

In my opinion, if the child has been sick since last week, has the child been to a doctor?  If so then gram can ask the Doc his professional opinion if the child could go out and be nurtured by dad, or if the child should stay home.  Gram should offer the docs opinion to Dad and Dad can make the decision if he thinks he wants to or better not to have the child while ill, or in the event dad feels it better to leave the child in his current environment to recouperate, then gram and dad should make an agreement to an alternate weekend when the child will be well.  

The last poster said her experience has been that kids want their mothers while ill, I wonder why then Gram is taking care of this child, I would think the child should be with his father.

Just my two cents.

[Ref]

That was my first thought. Maybe it would be better if the child is taken to the Dr. by the dad if the mom hasn't bothered to do so already.

A week of this for is 2 year old is way too long. If the baby is too ill to see dad, obviously it is serious enough for medical attention. If you don't agree, maybe you should question your motives.

Ref

[Windd]

Father's can take care of sick children also. There are male and female doctors.

I think the father should be allowed to have his time if he wants it.

If the child got sick while with the father shoulld he then stay with the father until he got better? According to your argument he should not be moved if he is sick.

[Gram]

Thanks for all your input. The child has seen the doctor, twice in fact. The BF does not want his time when the child is sick because he really doesn't know what to do, and doesn't want to deal with it. The baby was never too ill to see dad. I just didn't think it was good for a sick child to endure a 45 minute car ride (each direction) and wondered what other people do in this situation. The BF did not want to come here to take care of the child. His next scheduled visit is tomorrow, and the baby is better now, so is make-up time for the 2 hour midweek visit still necessary?

[Ref]

but a matter of what a good person would do. I think it would go a long way with your relationship with BF to at least make the offer. You may see it as ONLY a 2 hour visitation but that might mean much much more to the dad.

Good Luck
Ref

[wysiwyg]

nm